My dream starting five — basketball_team 🇺🇸
5 members · TeamBranch
Season Journal
Standings
| # | Team | W | L | Pts |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | Oklahoma City Treasure-Chest | 14 | 1 | 28 |
| 2 | Detroit Engine-Roar | 13 | 2 | 26 |
| 3 | Boston Ring-Chasers | 12 | 3 | 24 |
| 4 | Cleveland Twin-Towers | 11 | 4 | 22 |
| 5 | San Antonio Skyscrapers | 9 | 6 | 18 |
| 6 | New York Over-Timers | 9 | 6 | 18 |
| 7 | Minnesota Ice-Wall | 9 | 6 | 18 |
| 8 | Denver Horse-Track | 8 | 7 | 16 |
| 9 | My Team | 8 | 7 | 16 |
| 10 | Houston Blast-Off | 7 | 8 | 14 |
| 11 | Los Angeles Nursing-Home | 5 | 10 | 10 |
| 12 | Philadelphia Injury-Report | 5 | 10 | 10 |
| 13 | Toronto Border-Patrol | 4 | 11 | 8 |
| 14 | Phoenix No-Defense | 3 | 12 | 6 |
| 15 | Orlando Magic-Beans | 2 | 13 | 4 |
| 16 | Miami Heart-Attack | 1 | 14 | 2 |
Pre-season
Alright, sit your ass down for two minutes because tonight we're not messing around, we're diving headfirst into a sold-out arena that smells like rubber and sweat, with 20,000 fans ready to lose their damn voices. We're about to relive the saga of a franchise that's seen it all: the glory years when they bulldozed the league, the dark ages when nothing went in, and the Draft-night strokes of genius that brought them back to the summit. This ain't just basketball, this is American legend carried by physical freaks who aren't here to play nice, they're here to carve their names into NBA history with psycho stat lines and rim-rattling dunks that shake the whole damn building. The team with no name, baby! Yeah sure, it's a team sport, we all agree on that. But when you've got Magic Johnson on your roster, the word "team" basically means him plus four guys who pass him the ball. Standing at 206 cm, a first step more explosive than a rocket launch, and a fadeaway so silky that even the defenders applaud as they watch him score. Scouts had this dude flagged at 14. By 16, he was beating pros. Today? He's embarrassing them. The worst part? His ice-cold composure. The clock shows 0.8 seconds, the whole building is holding its breath, the ball is burning in his hands... And he flashes a little smirk before draining the game-winner with sickening ease. He's the engine, the brain, and the heartbeat of that locker room. If he sneezes, the whole damn franchise catches a cold. Tonight, he's on a mission, and believe me, he didn't show up to mess around. The chef's surprise of the evening is Mewtwo. An astrologer by profession. No, it's not a joke, it's an actual coaching staff decision. The GM nearly had a heart attack when he saw the signing, but the coach said: "Trust me, this guy can handle the cosmic fate with surgical precision, imagine what he can do with a basketball." Spoiler: so far, not much. The man spent his first week confusing the free throw line with the sideline, and asked three times if tackling was allowed. But he's got a heart size of a watermelon, he runs around like an overexcited golden retriever, and damn it, the crowd absolutely loves him. The budget? It's "here, take my credit card and go nuts." The owner is a damn billionaire who wants a championship ring the way other people want a yacht. Every position is doubled up, every role player is a former All-Star, and the bench is so deep that the twelfth man on this team would start for half the league. It's an armada, a war machine, and everyone in this building knows that if these guys don't win the title, it's a goddamn scandal.
Matchday 1 — vs Detroit Engine-Roar
113-110 (W)
This max-contract guy Tim Duncan means business! Fast start from the left corner!
Kobe Bryant deflects the pass and starts the break! This global icon defense to offense!
Magic Johnson misfires back to the basket! Even this undisputed superstar has off nights!
Kobe Bryant buries a buzzer-beater from mid-range! This global icon is on fire tonight!
Mewtwo counters the press! Problem solved, astrologer style!
Break! Kobe Bryant takes his jersey off before even reaching the locker room. Did you know? Kobe Bryant launched a basketball podcast. Two episodes. Zero listeners. Still going. The show goes on. Players take position. Silence. Whistle.
Tim Duncan with the pressure-proof euro-step facing the rim! On the inbound pass!
Tim Duncan with the full-court pressure! This established star making them uncomfortable!
Kobe Bryant in a Finals-like atmosphere! This all-time great has been waiting for this stage!
Son Goku with the clutch block! Not in this house, says the bushi!
Son Goku walks off the field house victorious! This dark horse owns this moment!
Tim Duncan pretends to faint from happiness. Kobe Bryant pretends to call 911. Behind the scenes, the cameraman told me I was making faces during free throws. I had no idea. Good night! Up next: 'My 600-Lb Neighbor: He Makes Noise at 3 AM.' Shocking testimonies.
Matchday 2 — vs Miami Heart-Attack
107-90 (W)
This potential GOAT Magic Johnson comes out aggressive! Opens with an off-balance shot from way beyond the arc!
This total unknown Son Goku finishes with authority! A pull-up jumper along the baseline!
Tim Duncan times it perfectly and rejects the shot! A double team driving to the hoop!
Magic Johnson with the hockey assist! That extra pass, beautiful basketball!
This all-time great Kobe Bryant attacks the closeout! Driving past the over-eager defender!
Halftime. The physio pounces on Son Goku to massage his thighs. Rumor has it Son Goku has been wearing the same lucky underwear for three seasons. The medical staff is concerned. Back on the hardwood. The tension has gone up a notch.
Magic Johnson with the and-one devastating dunk! Iron discipline through the whistle!
This certified GOAT candidate Kobe Bryant brings a standing ovation to a new level! Incredible scene!
Tim Duncan, this colossus, boxes out for the teammate! This world-class player doing the dirty work!
Son Goku, this do-it-all player, evolves before our eyes! A play that goes down in history!
That's the game! Tim Duncan finishes with a monster performance! This established star victorious!
Tim Duncan and Mewtwo chest bump so hard they each fly back three meters. Tonight my voice traveled three octaves. Baritone to soprano. Basketball does that to you. That's a wrap! Coming up: 'American Idol: Accountant Edition.' Singing, dancing, and spreadsheets.
Matchday 3 — vs Orlando Magic-Beans
123-88 (W)
Son Goku takes the floor with that look in his eyes! He came to play tonight!
Magic Johnson, this titan, rises above and hammers a finger roll!
Tim Duncan reads the defense like a book! Assist under the basket! Pure God-given talent!
This reliable star Tim Duncan with a picture-perfect and-one! The crowd goes wild!
Mewtwo denies the entry pass! No the cosmic fate gets past this astrologer!
Off to the locker room. Mewtwo has already drained two water bottles. Little secret: Mewtwo listens to Celine Dion to focus. I repeat, Celine Dion. The players step onto the hardwood once more. The second half starts now.
Tim Duncan with the highlight-reel tear drop! This top-tier talent owning the moment!
Magic Johnson, this once-in-a-lifetime player, still going full throttle! No mercy tonight!
Mewtwo just tried to use their star chart on the pill! Wrong equipment, right energy!
Kobe Bryant pumps the fist! This household name feeling it from the right corner! A raised fist!
Magic Johnson shoots into the tunnel with the W! This basketball god all smiles!
Magic Johnson and Son Goku do the conga. Alone. On an empty court. Nobody joins in. Behind the scenes, I learned Son Goku was also a bushi in a past life. You can feel it in the game. Thanks! And now, 'Neighbors from Hell: The Community Compost Bin Saga.' Episode 1 of 74.
Matchday 4 — vs Philadelphia Injury-Report
129-94 (W)
Son Goku locks eyes with the opponent! The stare of a bushi who means business!
A tear drop by Kobe Bryant! The crowd erupts! Natural-born leadership personified!
This elite player Tim Duncan with assist number points! Scary good handles on display!
Mewtwo, this raw talent, unleashes a hook shot facing the rim! Bang!
Magic Johnson, this walking skyscraper, contests everything from the right corner! An off-the-charts basketball IQ on full display!
Halftime. The doctor examines Magic Johnson's shoulder while the others catch their breath. Did you know? Magic Johnson has a personal mini-fridge in the locker room. Nobody knows what's inside. Both teams retake the floor. The best may be yet to come.
Son Goku puts it through! The reliability of a bushi with the feudal lord!
Magic Johnson even the deep bench is scoring! Complete team effort tonight!
Mewtwo mistakes the pill for the cosmic fate and starts divining it! Not today!
Son Goku, this versatile guy, gets the crowd on their feet! A primal scream! Electric!
Tim Duncan, this top-tier talent, high-fives the bench! A victory dance! Team effort!
Kobe Bryant throws chalk powder like LeBron. Tim Duncan coughs for two minutes straight. My evening in one word? Epic. In two words? Epic and loud. Off to bed! And now: 'Jeopardy: Cafeteria Trivia Edition.'
Matchday 5 — vs Phoenix No-Defense
114-105 (W)
Son Goku sets the tone early! The bushi came to play tonight!
Tim Duncan, this jersey-selling name, drills another double-clutch layup facing the rim! Automatic!
Magic Johnson draws the offensive foul! Smart play, great positioning!
Tim Duncan, this oversized freak, delivers the entry pass! Beautiful feed into the post!
Tim Duncan, this bonafide star, draws the double team and finds the open man! High IQ!
Halftime whistle! Mewtwo slides down against the hallway wall. Little scoop: Mewtwo collects Pokemon cards. That Charizard is worth more than his first contract. The players are back. The court had time to dry, at least.
Mewtwo tallies another one! This astrologer keeps racking them up!
Mewtwo bows to the fans! An astrologer bowing after the cosmic fate masterpiece!
Magic Johnson explodes the basketball into the right hands! This absolute legend quarterback!
Tim Duncan, this guy everybody knows, answers every challenge! A killer instinct never fading!
Kobe Bryant, this oversized freak, acknowledges the fans! A sold-out gym on fire! A bench mob celebration!
Son Goku throws chalk powder like LeBron. Tim Duncan coughs for two minutes straight. I spent the evening standing up and sitting down every thirty seconds. My Fitbit is congratulating me. Good evening! Coming up: 'Dancing with the Stars: My Cousin's Wedding Edition.' Open bar.
Matchday 6 — vs Los Angeles Nursing-Home
120-102 (W)
Game time! Kobe Bryant and this household name ready to put on a show at the palace of hoops!
Kobe Bryant, this basketball god, knifes through for a deep three under the basket! Wow!
This all-time great Kobe Bryant with the weak-side drawn charge! Incredible help!
Son Goku threads the needle! Beautiful assist on the low block! Unreal court vision!
Tim Duncan, this mountain of a man, positions perfectly for the offensive rebound! Night-in night-out consistency!
Intermission. Tim Duncan dumps an entire water bottle over his head. Little secret: Tim Duncan listens to Celine Dion to focus. I repeat, Celine Dion. The players come back running. Did someone set the locker room on fire?
Tim Duncan scores at will! A half-court heave driving to the hoop! This certified bucket domination!
An incredible energy as Mewtwo warms up with some astrologer moves!
Tim Duncan, this 7-footer, holds the team together with an off-the-charts basketball IQ! Captain!
The stadium knows it! Magic Johnson is special! This guy with rings on every finger writing legacy!
Tim Duncan, this certified bucket, embraces the teammates! A slide across the hardwood! Sweet victory!
Magic Johnson rips the net off the rim. Son Goku wraps it around his neck like a scarf. Behind the scenes, I learned Son Goku was also a bushi in a past life. You can feel it in the game. Good evening! Up next: 'Fixer Upper: Renovating a Studio on a Twelve-Dollar Budget.' Challenge accepted.
Matchday 7 — vs Toronto Border-Patrol
108-88 (W)
Son Goku checks in for the first play! Clocking in for the shift, let's work!
Magic Johnson knocks down a bank shot at the buzzer! Ice in the veins!
Tim Duncan with the huge perfect contest facing the rim! This headliner says no!
Mewtwo with the give-and-go! Teamwork from divining the cosmic fate together!
Tim Duncan spaces the floor perfectly! Great read of the system!
The locker room. Tim Duncan sprawls out full-length on the bench. Staff confession: Tim Duncan is afraid of pigeons. Not 7-foot centers, no. Pigeons. The players are back. Some look fresh, others... Not so much.
A bucket by Kobe Bryant from downtown! Night-in night-out consistency in every fiber!
The arena chants for Mewtwo during every stoppage! Astrologer pride echoes!
Son Goku makes the extra pass! Extra effort, the bushi way!
This game belongs to Kobe Bryant! This first-ballot legend stamping authority from downtown!
Mewtwo daps up the opposition! Class act, on and off the court!
Kobe Bryant does a backflip. Well, he tries. Son Goku applauds the effort. My evening? A microphone, cold coffee, and the greatest show on earth. What more could you ask for. Thanks for the game! And now, tonight's feature film: 'Fast and Furious 47: The Quest for a Parking Spot.'
Matchday 8 — vs Minnesota Ice-Wall
93-108 (L)
Magic Johnson looks dialed in from the start! Night-in night-out consistency preparation showing!
Kobe Bryant forces a bad free throw! This undisputed superstar needs to trust teammates!
Kobe Bryant with a wild pass that sails out! This guy with rings on every finger giving it away!
Mewtwo gets posterized! An astrologer framed by their star chart in the worst way!
Son Goku pulls up and drills an and-one! Can't teach that!
End of the second quarter. Son Goku is breathing so loud you can hear it from here. Locker room anecdote: Son Goku talks to a sock called 'Assistant Coach.' We don't judge. We're off again! The crowd chants the team's name.
Magic Johnson storms to the bench! This absolute legend is visibly upset!
Son Goku, this dude out of nowhere, with a contested buzzer beater that misses from mid-range!
Son Goku executes a triangle offense perfectly! Precision learned as a bushi!
This max-contract guy Tim Duncan can't close out! The legs are shot on the low block!
Son Goku walks off in defeat! Even a bushi's skills couldn't save tonight!
Mewtwo taps the tunnel wall as if trying to pass through it. Tim Duncan walks through the door without pushing it. My chair squeaked the entire game. Everyone thinks it was me. It was not me. Thanks for the game! And now, tonight's feature film: 'Fast and Furious 47: The Quest for a Parking Spot.'
Matchday 9 — vs Houston Blast-Off
92-106 (L)
Tim Duncan fires up the crowd to open the game! This guy everybody knows starting strong!
Mewtwo, this all-around player, gets the look at the buzzer but the lid's on the rim!
Kobe Bryant throws it into the stands! What was that from this basketball god!
Magic Johnson bites on the pump fake! This franchise cornerstone sent flying in transition!
This hall-of-fame lock Magic Johnson with a beautiful double-clutch layup at the buzzer! Poetry in motion!
Time to breathe. Mewtwo has both hands on both knees, completely cooked. They say Mewtwo eats honey straight from the jar during timeouts. The bear of the hardwood. Back at it! The players jog toward center court.
Magic Johnson, this undisputed superstar, with the frustrated foul! Heavy feet in tough moments!
Mewtwo, this diamond in the rough, fumbles the finish from the right corner! Back to the drawing board!
Magic Johnson, this long boy, posts up the smaller defender! Mismatch hunting!
Magic Johnson is gassed! This guy with rings on every finger bent over at half court! Defense that's basically a suggestion catching up!
Kobe Bryant walks off in silence. This certified GOAT candidate gave it all but it wasn't enough.
Kobe Bryant sits down on the hardwood, head on his knees. Tim Duncan puts a hand on his shoulder without saying a word. During the game, my colleague ordered sushi. It arrived at the final buzzer. Perfect timing. Off to bed! And now: 'Jeopardy: Cafeteria Trivia Edition.'
Matchday 10 — vs Denver Horse-Track
110-96 (W)
Mewtwo, this combo guard, takes the court! The sold-out gym on fire is electric!
A fadeaway jumper! Kobe Bryant cannot be stopped tonight! This all-time great is locked in!
Son Goku rotates beautifully! Spinning with precision worthy of their katana blade!
Mewtwo times the pass perfectly! Timing of an astrologer with their star chart!
Son Goku triggers the fast break! Launching the offense with bushi urgency!
Halftime. The doctor examines Magic Johnson's shoulder while the others catch their breath. Confession: Magic Johnson calls mom after every loss. And every win. And also on Tuesdays. Back at it! The coach said two words. Two words that were enough.
Son Goku cuts and scores! Sharp as their katana blade, this bushi!
The fans sense it coming! The energy is building as Mewtwo gets hot!
This living legend Kobe Bryant runs the damn ball patiently! Searching for the perfect shot!
They said an astrologer couldn't play at this level. Mewtwo and their star chart disagree!
Tim Duncan, this titan, celebrates the win! A raised fist! What a game!
Magic Johnson and Kobe Bryant carry Mewtwo like a trophy across the entire court. Your favorite commentator survived. It's not much, but it's honest work. See you tomorrow. In the meantime, it's 'Who Wants to Marry My Goldfish.' Good luck with that.
Matchday 11 — vs New York Over-Timers
90-103 (L)
Tip-off! Tim Duncan gets us started! Let's go!
This certified GOAT candidate Magic Johnson whiffs on a bucket! The crowd groans!
This dude out of nowhere Son Goku dribbles off the foot! Unforced error!
Magic Johnson loses the screen battle! Heavy feet around the picks!
Tim Duncan with another devastating dunk! You can't stop this man!
Coach calls everyone back. Kobe Bryant drags his feet toward the tunnel. Locker room anecdote: Kobe Bryant talks to a sock called 'Assistant Coach.' We don't judge. Play resumes! The coach set a few things straight in the locker room.
Tim Duncan fades away and kicks the stanchion! This world-class player losing composure!
This household name Kobe Bryant short-arms a scoop layup from the left corner! Not enough lift!
Magic Johnson reads the defense perfectly! Scary good handles and a sky-high basketball IQ!
Tim Duncan takes off but the legs won't cooperate! Sometimes predictable game catching up!
This total unknown Mewtwo congratulates the opponent. Class in defeat from this total unknown.
Kobe Bryant is the last one off the court, shoulders hunched. Mewtwo waits at the tunnel entrance. Yours truly survived this game without losing his voice. It was touch and go. That's a wrap! And now, the network's masterpiece: 'My Cat, My Battle.' Don't miss the finale.
Matchday 12 — vs Cleveland Twin-Towers
93-98 (L)
Son Goku bounces the leather pre-game! Getting that rhythm going!
An off-balance shot from Tim Duncan hits the iron! Lack of consistency under the spotlight!
Magic Johnson explodes into a dead end driving to the hoop! Turnover! Injury-prone body!
This global icon Magic Johnson can't recover! Scored on back to the basket! Tendency to force bad shots!
This absolute legend Kobe Bryant with a vintage buzzer beater! The old magic is still there!
Halftime! Mewtwo walks barefoot on the cold tunnel tiles. Juicy intel: Mewtwo turned down an endorsement deal because he'd have to wear a mascot costume. The players emerge from the tunnel. Stern faces, clenched fists.
Mewtwo, this player nobody saw coming, yells at the coaching staff! Limited stamina causing friction!
Kobe Bryant, this towering presence, can't finish from way beyond the arc! That one stings!
Tim Duncan attacks with purpose every possession! This All-Star caliber talent chess master!
This absolute legend Kobe Bryant can barely get up the court! Fatigue setting in!
Mewtwo leaves the arena with dignity! The dignity of an astrologer with their star chart!
Son Goku walks head down toward the tunnel. Magic Johnson drags his feet behind, shoulders slumped. I got a text from Son Goku after the game. Just kidding. Nobody texts me. Good evening! Up next: 'Criminal Minds: Finding the Colleague Who Steals Yogurt from the Fridge.'
Matchday 13 — vs Boston Ring-Chasers
97-104 (L)
And we're underway! Tim Duncan touches the damn ball first! This top-tier talent looks eager!
Magic Johnson drives the orange into the front rim! That's frustrating for this undisputed superstar!
Mewtwo charges right into the defender! Turnover! Injury-prone body when controlling pace!
This franchise cornerstone Kobe Bryant picks up the cheap foul! Ego the size of Texas showing!
Son Goku pulls up through traffic and scores! Incredible finish!
The locker room. Son Goku sprawls out full-length on the bench. Little secret: Son Goku listens to Celine Dion to focus. I repeat, Celine Dion. The tunnel spits the players out. The war resumes.
Kobe Bryant, this colossus, throws the hands up! Exasperated at the top of the key!
This hall-of-fame lock Magic Johnson muscles up a double-clutch layup but can't get it to fall!
Son Goku sets up the play three passes ahead! Three moves ahead, like a bushi at work!
Tim Duncan is cramping up! This top-tier talent trying to shake it off! Injury-prone body!
Magic Johnson reflects on what could have been. Hot head the difference tonight.
Tim Duncan walks head down toward the tunnel. Son Goku drags his feet behind, shoulders slumped. Tonight my colleague told me I smell like stress. I told him it was my cologne. That's all for tonight. And now: 'Deadliest Catch: Rush Hour on the Beltway.' Documentary.
Matchday 14 — vs San Antonio Skyscrapers
99-100 (L)
Mewtwo steps onto the gym! From divining the cosmic fate to this, game time!
This guy with rings on every finger Kobe Bryant does it again! A layup with effortless precision!
Mewtwo, this swiss-army-knife type, can't keep up with the speed! Hot head exposed!
Mewtwo can't connect! Their star chart in hand, sure. The Wilson through the hoop, nope!
This total unknown Son Goku with back-to-back buckets! The lead is crumbling!
Halftime! Magic Johnson has the hardwood pattern imprinted on his elbow. Quick anecdote about Magic Johnson: apparently he eats pasta with ketchup before every game. To each their own ritual. Resumption imminent. The players wrap up their express warm-up.
This diamond in the rough Mewtwo fouls in the clutch! Sometimes predictable game showing late!
Son Goku, this who-is-this-guy player, barks at the teammate! Injury-prone body taking over!
Kobe Bryant crosses over through pain, through doubt! This once-in-a-lifetime player transcending!
Magic Johnson, this titan, forces a bad shot in the closing moments! Limited stamina!
Son Goku consoles teammates! The heart of a bushi in that moment!
Kobe Bryant's complexion is grey. Son Goku's is red. Defeat comes in different colors. Tonight I lost my voice, rediscovered my passion, and forgot where I parked. A complete evening. That's it for tonight. Coming up: 'True Confessions: I Put Ketchup on Pasta.'
Matchday 15 — vs Oklahoma City Treasure-Chest
96-112 (L)
Tim Duncan, this big-name player, wins the opening tip! Great start for the team!
Mewtwo misses the triple! Three-pointers aren't like triple-checking the cosmic fate!
Son Goku with the backcourt violation! A bushi going backwards with the feudal lord!
This potential breakout star Mewtwo gives up the offensive rebound! Tendency to force bad shots when boxing out!
Tim Duncan crosses over to the rack for a free throw! Can't contain this oversized freak!
Intermission. Magic Johnson dumps an entire water bottle over his head. Exclusive: Magic Johnson was caught reading a philosophy book on the bench. It was Nietzsche. Alright, it's time. The second half waits for no one.
Kobe Bryant, this oversized freak, waves off the play call! Lack of consistency hurting the team!
Magic Johnson, this mountain of a man, loses the handle and the opportunity! Limited stamina!
Mewtwo reads the defense like a book! Perfect play call from this astrologer!
This franchise guy Tim Duncan has heavy legs! The pace has been brutal!
Kobe Bryant sits alone on the bench. This guy with rings on every finger processing the defeat.
Magic Johnson stands alone at center court as the lights go dim. Son Goku comes back to get him. Yours truly held it together all evening without a bathroom break. That's professionalism. Good evening! Now: 'Destination Unknown: The Roundabout in Scranton, PA.' Total adventure.
My Team ends the season #9 with a 8W-7L record. Season MVP: Magic Johnson.
Season Journal
Alright, sit your ass down for two minutes because tonight we're not messing around, we're diving headfirst into a sold-out arena that smells like rubber and sweat, with 20,000 fans ready to lose their damn voices. We're about to relive the saga of a franchise that's seen it all: the glory years when they bulldozed the league, the dark ages when nothing went in, and the Draft-night strokes of genius that brought them back to the summit. This ain't just basketball, this is American legend carried by physical freaks who aren't here to play nice, they're here to carve their names into NBA history with psycho stat lines and rim-rattling dunks that shake the whole damn building. The team with no name, baby!
Yeah sure, it's a team sport, we all agree on that. But when you've got Magic Johnson on your roster, the word "team" basically means him plus four guys who pass him the ball. Standing at 206 cm, a first step more explosive than a rocket launch, and a fadeaway so silky that even the defenders applaud as they watch him score. Scouts had this dude flagged at 14. By 16, he was beating pros. Today? He's embarrassing them.
The worst part? His ice-cold composure. The clock shows 0.8 seconds, the whole building is holding its breath, the ball is burning in his hands... And he flashes a little smirk before draining the game-winner with sickening ease. He's the engine, the brain, and the heartbeat of that locker room. If he sneezes, the whole damn franchise catches a cold. Tonight, he's on a mission, and believe me, he didn't show up to mess around.
The chef's surprise of the evening is Mewtwo. An astrologer by profession. No, it's not a joke, it's an actual coaching staff decision. The GM nearly had a heart attack when he saw the signing, but the coach said: "Trust me, this guy can handle the cosmic fate with surgical precision, imagine what he can do with a basketball." Spoiler: so far, not much. The man spent his first week confusing the free throw line with the sideline, and asked three times if tackling was allowed. But he's got a heart size of a watermelon, he runs around like an overexcited golden retriever, and damn it, the crowd absolutely loves him.
The budget? It's "here, take my credit card and go nuts." The owner is a damn billionaire who wants a championship ring the way other people want a yacht. Every position is doubled up, every role player is a former All-Star, and the bench is so deep that the twelfth man on this team would start for half the league. It's an armada, a war machine, and everyone in this building knows that if these guys don't win the title, it's a goddamn scandal.
My Team ends the season #9 with a 8W-7L record. Season MVP: Magic Johnson.
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