Berik Serik — basketball_team 🇺🇸
5 members · TeamBranch
Season Journal
Standings
| # | Team | W | L | Pts |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | Detroit Engine-Roar | 15 | 0 | 30 |
| 2 | Oklahoma City Treasure-Chest | 12 | 3 | 24 |
| 3 | Berik Serik | 12 | 3 | 24 |
| 4 | San Antonio Skyscrapers | 11 | 4 | 22 |
| 5 | New York Over-Timers | 10 | 5 | 20 |
| 6 | Cleveland Twin-Towers | 9 | 6 | 18 |
| 7 | Minnesota Ice-Wall | 9 | 6 | 18 |
| 8 | Boston Ring-Chasers | 8 | 7 | 16 |
| 9 | Denver Horse-Track | 8 | 7 | 16 |
| 10 | Toronto Border-Patrol | 7 | 8 | 14 |
| 11 | Houston Blast-Off | 5 | 10 | 10 |
| 12 | Los Angeles Nursing-Home | 4 | 11 | 8 |
| 13 | Phoenix No-Defense | 4 | 11 | 8 |
| 14 | Philadelphia Injury-Report | 3 | 12 | 6 |
| 15 | Orlando Magic-Beans | 2 | 13 | 4 |
| 16 | Miami Heart-Attack | 1 | 14 | 2 |
Pre-season
Let's not beat around the bush: tonight is going to be one hell of a show. The arena is packed, the air is unbreathable with tension, and the lights just went out for the pregame laser show. We're talking about a franchise that has weathered every storm: lockouts, star injuries, catastrophic trades, rebuilds that never seemed to end. And they're still here, standing tall, with the same fire in their belly. This club is a survivor. And when survivors bite, they don't let go. Ladies and gentlemen... Berik Serik! Alright, let's not kid ourselves, if the arena is packed to the gills, it's because of THE phenomenon. This guy isn't just a basketball player, he's a walking cheat code on the hardwood: give it up for Iron Man! Picture this: standing at 6 cm, but he handles the rock with the agility of a 5'10" point guard and launches missiles from 30 feet like he's at shootaround. When he attacks the paint, it's simple, he's a freight train: either you get out of the way, or you end up on his poster doing the rounds on social media for a week straight. What kills you about this guy is that he makes basketball look easy. You watch him and you think "well yeah, it's simple." And then you realize the defender in front of him is 6'9", runs a 4.4 forty, and he just dropped a step-back in his face like he was dribbling against a traffic cone at practice. It's not ease, it's absolute mastery disguised as nonchalance. And damn, is it beautiful to watch. And because this season couldn't possibly be normal, the coach went out and signed Jesus Christ. The man. Is. A messiah. I'm going to let that marinate for two seconds. A messiah. On a professional basketball court. With guys who jump 3 feet off the ground. This dude jumps 6 inches, on a good day, with a running start and the wind at his back. But he's got bare hands and apparently, the technical motion of a messiah and a pull-up jumper are "basically the same thing, give or take 90 degrees." That's what the coach said. The team doctor immediately requested a cognitive evaluation for the coach. Now we're talking real money. They're above the cap but being careful not to cross into luxury tax territory. They're using their trade exceptions and mid-level to plug the gaps. This is a playoff-caliber team: they've got the goods, a balanced roster, but they're always one big move short of landing a true superstar.
Matchday 1 — vs Detroit Engine-Roar
83-116 (L)
Iron Man looks dialed in from the start! A gym-rat work ethic preparation showing!
Stephen Curry, this versatile guy, can't get an off-balance shot to drop! Cold as ice tonight!
This world-class player Stephen Curry with a careless turnover! Gift-wrapped for the opponent!
This world-class player Stephen Curry gives up the offensive rebound! Tendency to rush when boxing out!
Iron Man walks away muttering! Muttering about the game under their breath!
Break! Stephen Curry has left a puddle of sweat at every step through the tunnel. Little scoop: Stephen Curry collects Pokemon cards. That Charizard is worth more than his first contract. Back in action! The coach got the message across.
This bonafide star Stephen Curry muscles up a catch-and-shoot triple but can't get it to fall!
Stephen Curry, this combo guard, is moving in slow motion! Tank is empty!
Stephen Curry throws it away! Heavy feet under pressure from the left corner!
This certified bucket Stephen Curry stares at the ref! That look could freeze water!
Stephen Curry, this jersey-selling name, takes the loss hard. Tendency to rush at the wrong moments.
Kawhi Leonard punches his locker when he gets to the locker room. Anthony Edwards slides down the wall to the floor. Your commentator survived one game, four coffees, and a sandwich of questionable date. See you soon. And now: '911: My Cat Climbed on Top of the Wardrobe.'
Matchday 2 — vs Miami Heart-Attack
119-79 (W)
Jesus Christ starts in the role player! Playing the role player the way a messiah plays with their bare hands!
The technical flair of Jesus Christ recalls their messiah days. A pull-up jumper! Sublime!
Iron Man hits the trailer! Connecting plays with their bare hands accuracy!
Kawhi Leonard with an incredible thunderous slam back to the basket! Standing ovation!
Iron Man locks down the top of the key! Fortified with their bare hands!
The players head in. Jesus Christ slips on the wet tunnel floor. Little scoop: Jesus Christ tried to bribe the DJ to play his song. The DJ agreed. Nobody liked it. The players are back on the court. Here we go again!
A finger roll from Anthony Edwards! This established player reminding everyone why they're on top!
This world-class player Stephen Curry adds another! This is a demolition job!
Jesus Christ asked where the game locker is! It's a locker room, not a workshop!
Jesus Christ mimics using their bare hands as a microphone! The messiah is the star tonight!
Jesus Christ puts a bow on it! Clean finish, just like a messiah wrapping up the job!
Kawhi Leonard launches his shoe into the air. Stephen Curry catches it. Standing ovation. During the game, my colleague ordered sushi. It arrived at the final buzzer. Perfect timing. Thanks for being here. Now put down the remote, it's time for 'Wheel of Misfortune.'
Matchday 3 — vs Orlando Magic-Beans
126-90 (W)
Jesus Christ, this all-time great, draws first blood! A devastating dunk to start!
Anthony Edwards dishes the pill with purpose! A layup! This well-respected player means business!
Anthony Edwards with the transition assist! This guy with a proven track record pushing the pace with freakish explosiveness!
Stephen Curry drains a step-back three at the top of the key! Textbook a gym-rat work ethic!
This multi-time All-Star Stephen Curry disrupts the play with a timely perfect contest!
Finally a breather. Kawhi Leonard has calf cramps, the physio rushes over. Juicy intel: Kawhi Leonard turned down an endorsement deal because he'd have to wear a mascot costume. The players come back running. Did someone set the locker room on fire?
Jesus Christ muscles through for an alley-oop! The strength of a messiah moving the game!
Jesus Christ rises up with confidence! The game is well in hand for this generational talent!
Jesus Christ calls a timeout team doesn't have! This once-in-a-lifetime player lost count!
Jesus Christ does a victory lap! Lapping the court with messiah swagger!
Iron Man, this all-time great, soaks in the moment! Victory on the low block! A primal scream!
Anthony Edwards jumps into Stephen Curry's arms without warning. They both go down. While you were watching the game, I was desperately searching for my pen. Still haven't found it. We're signing off. And now: 'Musical Chairs: Subway Seat Edition.' Winner takes all.
Matchday 4 — vs Philadelphia Injury-Report
133-88 (W)
Iron Man stretches center court! Loosening up, the superhero is getting ready!
Iron Man floats one in in transition! Delicate as a superhero with their bare hands!
Iron Man with the bounce pass! The pill bouncing with precision worthy of their bare hands!
Iron Man penetrates and converts! A bank shot at the buzzer! Money!
Stephen Curry, this top-tier talent, shuts down the play off the pick and roll! Lockdown defender!
End of the first act. Stephen Curry is puffing like a steam engine heading back. Rumor has it Stephen Curry does 100 push-ups before every game. Or 10. Depends who you ask. The players jog toward the court. The air is electric.
Jesus Christ, this solid build, with a silky floater from the right corner! Smooth operator!
Iron Man dominates wire to wire! Dominant as a superhero over the game!
Iron Man called a timeout to check on the game! Priorities!
Jesus Christ lets out a roar! The emotion is real! An ice-cold stare at the opposing bench!
Iron Man has the last say! Final word from a superhero about the game!
Anthony Edwards does a belly slide on the court. Stephen Curry does a back slide. The hardwood is ruined. Tonight I yelled so loud the guy in the next booth asked me to keep it down. Mid-game. Off to bed! And now: 'Jeopardy: Cafeteria Trivia Edition.'
Matchday 5 — vs Phoenix No-Defense
106-103 (W)
This dude putting the league on notice Kawhi Leonard comes out aggressive! Opens with a layup back to the basket!
This legit talent Kawhi Leonard with a critical stop! A sky-high block when it counts!
Iron Man can't convert! The superhero's touch with the game deserted them!
Jesus Christ converts the and-one! Tough as competing the game all day!
Jesus Christ with the perfect cut! Precision of a messiah with their bare hands!
Back to the locker room. Anthony Edwards's shorts are torn but he couldn't care less. Intel: Anthony Edwards once called an imaginary timeout in the middle of a game. The ref actually hesitated. Tipoff! The ball bounces, the arena vibrates, we're back.
Kawhi Leonard, this walking skyscraper, comes through when called upon! At the last second! Star!
This generational talent Iron Man holds ground in transition! Immovable object!
You can cut the tension with a knife! A sold-out gym on fire as Iron Man steps up!
Anthony Edwards breaks the tie! A half-court heave! This guy with a proven track record wants to be the hero!
Iron Man is named player of the game! The superhero is also the star!
Stephen Curry and Anthony Edwards play rock-paper-scissors to decide who carries the ball. Stephen Curry loses. I discovered tonight that my mic was off for three minutes. Three minutes of pure genius, lost forever. Good night everyone! Coming up: 'Boot Camp: Supermarket Checkout Line Edition.' Discipline.
Matchday 6 — vs Los Angeles Nursing-Home
103-96 (W)
Iron Man pulls up with energy from the opening whistle! This certified GOAT candidate locked in!
Stephen Curry hits a fadeaway jumper! Natural-born leadership proving to be the difference tonight!
This bonafide star Stephen Curry with a clutch steal at half court! Intimidating!
Anthony Edwards dribbles and dishes! Gorgeous feed from downtown! Scary good handles!
Kawhi Leonard slows the pace when the team needs it! This respected competitor tempo control!
Halftime! Kawhi Leonard checks his stats on the board and winces. Juicy anecdote: Kawhi Leonard was caught dancing the Macarena in the showers. Alone. We're back! The coach drew stuff on the whiteboard, let's see if it works.
Stephen Curry, this franchise guy, operates driving to the hoop with a pull-up jumper! Clinic!
Standing room only! A sold-out gym on fire as Stephen Curry takes over from way beyond the arc!
This player on the come-up Anthony Edwards dives for the loose ball! Insane court vision on every play!
Anthony Edwards is inevitable tonight! This name that's buzzing can't be stopped!
This established player Anthony Edwards led from start to finish! Comprehensive win!
Iron Man moonwalks across the hardwood. Stephen Curry attempts the worm. One of them pulls it off. Tonight I chewed through two pens. The office supply budget is going to explode. That's all for tonight! Coming up: 'CSI: Underground Parking Garage.' Riveting stuff.
Matchday 7 — vs Toronto Border-Patrol
117-83 (W)
This respected competitor Kawhi Leonard opens the scoring! A floater! Early advantage!
Kawhi Leonard, this beanpole, overpowers for a step-back three! Size matters!
Jesus Christ with the alley-oop pass! Launching the basketball with messiah precision!
This up-and-coming baller Anthony Edwards does it again! A bank shot with effortless precision!
Iron Man with the full-court pressure! This franchise cornerstone making them uncomfortable!
Heading in. Jesus Christ's eyes are bloodshot from sheer effort. Quick anecdote about Jesus Christ: apparently he eats pasta with ketchup before every game. To each their own ritual. Break's over, the players take their positions.
Anthony Edwards pulls up and drills a thunderous slam! Can't teach that!
Jesus Christ dishes and it's too easy! The lead is ballooning! Mercy rule!
Iron Man just tried to use their bare hands on the Spalding! Wrong equipment, right energy!
This hooper's hooper Kawhi Leonard waves goodbye to the opponent! A finger to the lips to hush the crowd! Savage!
Kawhi Leonard pumps the fist as the buzzer goes! This league veteran savors the win!
Jesus Christ takes a bow for the crowd. Iron Man bows to Jesus Christ. The nobility of basketball. Tonight I lost my voice, rediscovered my passion, and forgot where I parked. A complete evening. Thanks everyone! And now: 'Keeping Up with the Kardashians: Season 312.' They will never stop.
Matchday 8 — vs Minnesota Ice-Wall
108-99 (W)
Jesus Christ, this swiss-army-knife type, takes the court! The boiling cauldron is electric!
Jesus Christ treats the pill like the game and sinks it. Easy as pie for a messiah!
Anthony Edwards with the help-side ball recovery! This solid pro always in position!
Iron Man, this short king, finds the rolling big man! A catch-and-shoot triple off the assist!
This respected competitor Kawhi Leonard calls the audible! Changed the play and it works!
The players disappear. Iron Man has a makeshift neck brace out of a towel. Anecdote: Iron Man tried to impress the Minnesota Ice-Wall players with a warm-up dunk. Hit the rim. With his face. Back on the court. The crowd greets them with a standing ovation.
A free throw from Kawhi Leonard! This solid pro is putting on a show tonight!
The crowd waves their bare hands replicas! Jesus Christ has started a movement!
Stephen Curry takes the blame for the mistake! This world-class player protecting teammates!
Stephen Curry, this max-contract guy, has been building to this all game! On the inbound pass!
Kawhi Leonard shoots in triumph! The final buzzer sounds! That's a W!
Kawhi Leonard moonwalks across the hardwood. Jesus Christ attempts the worm. One of them pulls it off. During the break, I tried doing crunches behind the console. My back remembers. Thanks everyone! Up next: 'Ice Road Truckers: Uber Eats Delivery on a Rainy Night.'
Matchday 9 — vs Houston Blast-Off
108-96 (W)
Iron Man comes out hot! Heated up and ready, the superhero means business!
Jesus Christ fires away and scores! Those messiah hands work wonders with the Spalding!
Kawhi Leonard pressures the inbound! This player making noise with relentless a killer instinct!
This guy everybody knows Stephen Curry with the behind-the-back dish! Highlight-reel pass!
This player making noise Kawhi Leonard uses the floater over this tree of a man coverage! Smart!
The players leave the court. Jesus Christ clings to the tunnel railing. Rumor has it Jesus Christ talks to his basketball in the locker room. Nobody dares say it's weird. The players are back. Some look fresh, others... Not so much.
This world-class player Stephen Curry erupts for a double-clutch layup! The floodgates are open!
The energy in this building is unreal! Anthony Edwards channeling palpable tension!
Iron Man glues the team together! Team-first mentality, pure superhero instinct!
Iron Man is the protagonist tonight! This guy with rings on every finger authoring a masterpiece!
Jesus Christ delivers in this heated rivalry! The messiah shows up with their bare hands!
Stephen Curry gives his headband to a kid in the crowd. Anthony Edwards gives his shoes. Iron Man gives his water bottle. The kid is overwhelmed. Confession: I nearly fell asleep during the second quarter. The third woke me right up. We're done! And now: 'The Voice: Office Karaoke After Two Beers Edition.'
Matchday 10 — vs Denver Horse-Track
99-96 (W)
Stephen Curry goes to work onto the floor! The crowd roars for this multi-time All-Star!
Stephen Curry, this combo guard, clamps down in the clutch! Elite a charge taken!
Anthony Edwards fires a bucket at the top of the key but can't connect! Injury-prone body showing!
This seasoned vet Kawhi Leonard with a picture-perfect alley-oop! The crowd goes wild!
Kawhi Leonard reads the defense perfectly! Insane court vision and a sky-high basketball IQ!
Into the tunnel. Anthony Edwards grabs a banana on the way and devours it. Fun fact: Anthony Edwards got rejected at a casting for a deodorant commercial. The irony. The players are back. The court had time to dry, at least.
Iron Man with the game-winner! The winning touch of their bare hands on the game!
Stephen Curry a sky-high block with authority! This smooth operator protecting the paint!
Deafening noise! Stephen Curry pulls up and the building shakes!
Stephen Curry converts in traffic during the extra period! A tear drop! An unmatched feel for the game!
This dude putting the league on notice Kawhi Leonard walks off to a standing ovation! A standing ovation! Incredible!
Kawhi Leonard climbs onto the scorer's table. Jesus Christ joins him. Security is unsure whether to intervene. During the break, I tried doing crunches behind the console. My back remembers. Alright, good evening! Now it's 'Love Is in the Parking Lot.' Romance guaranteed.
Matchday 11 — vs New York Over-Timers
95-96 (L)
Jesus Christ gets the crowd going early! Setting the tone like a messiah on day one!
Jesus Christ pops the jumper! Clean as their bare hands after a polish!
Iron Man can't stay in front! Competing the game doesn't build lateral quickness!
This league veteran Anthony Edwards puts up a hook shot but it won't fall! Off night!
Stephen Curry, this do-it-all player, energizes the crowd! Wild stands! Comeback vibes!
Break. Stephen Curry collapses next to the vending machine. Juicy anecdote: Stephen Curry was caught dancing the Macarena in the showers. Alone. Second half! The hardwood is about to shake again.
Jesus Christ turns it over at right from the tip-off! Worst time to drop the leather!
This solid pro Anthony Edwards slaps the floor in anger! The frustration is palpable!
Stephen Curry is writing the story tonight! This big-name player with a floater from the right corner!
Jesus Christ, this once-in-a-lifetime player, misses the potential game-winner! Limited stamina!
Iron Man walks off in silence. This hall-of-fame lock gave it all but it wasn't enough.
Stephen Curry pushes away the reporter's microphone with a gesture. Iron Man takes the interview and says 'not tonight'. Did you know that Iron Man practices superhero on Tuesdays? Builds character, that does. Thanks for watching this game. And now: 'Deal or No Deal: Office Fridge Edition.'
Matchday 12 — vs Cleveland Twin-Towers
97-94 (W)
And we're underway! Anthony Edwards touches the Spalding first! This hooper's hooper looks eager!
Stephen Curry with a textbook defensive stance! That's how you do it!
Anthony Edwards with the off-balance tear drop! This respected competitor couldn't set the feet!
An alley-oop from Iron Man! This franchise cornerstone just keeps delivering!
Anthony Edwards spaces the floor perfectly! Great read of the system!
Both teams head to the locker room. Stephen Curry wipes his forehead with his jersey. Confession: Stephen Curry believes the away locker room is haunted. Refuses to go in alone. Play resumes. The DJ drops a beat to hype up the crowd.
Kawhi Leonard, this oversized freak, with the clutch sky hook! The building erupts!
Kawhi Leonard rotates perfectly for the sky-high block! Silky smooth technique on full display!
Anthony Edwards, this absolute unit, commands a hostile crowd! The arena belongs to this league veteran!
Stephen Curry, this smooth operator, hits the big shot! On a strategic timeout! That's a closer!
Kawhi Leonard hugs the coach! This hooper's hooper with a complete performance!
Stephen Curry climbs onto the scorer's table. Kawhi Leonard joins him. Security is unsure whether to intervene. Confession: I bet against my favorite team tonight. Superstition. It works half the time. We're done for tonight. And now: 'Ancient Aliens: The True History of the Coffee Break.'
Matchday 13 — vs Boston Ring-Chasers
105-98 (W)
This hall-of-fame lock Iron Man comes out firing! A buzzer beater in the first minute!
An off-balance shot from Iron Man! That's an off-the-charts basketball IQ at the highest level!
Jesus Christ stands firm! Not moving, this messiah is planted!
This certified bucket Stephen Curry zips the pass through! Another dime from this versatile guy!
Iron Man spaces the floor! Making room out there like a superhero clears the workspace!
Halftime whistle! Stephen Curry slides down against the hallway wall. Rumor has it Stephen Curry has been wearing the same lucky underwear for three seasons. The medical staff is concerned. Both teams return. You can tell the coach gave them an earful.
Iron Man with a pull-up jumper on the break! Running like they're late for work!
Kawhi Leonard, this oversized freak, basks in an electric crowd! This is home!
This league veteran Anthony Edwards celebrates the teammate's score! It's about the team!
Anthony Edwards blows past with conviction! This legit talent believes tonight is the night!
Iron Man, this living legend, embraces the teammates! A team high-five! Sweet victory!
Stephen Curry dumps his Gatorade on Anthony Edwards who screams because it was cold. Kawhi Leonard piles on. I got a text from Stephen Curry after the game. Just kidding. Nobody texts me. We're out! And now, 'House Hunters: Broom Closet Edition.' Cozy open concept.
Matchday 14 — vs San Antonio Skyscrapers
99-93 (W)
Kawhi Leonard rises up into position! This established player not wasting any time!
This well-respected player Kawhi Leonard with a vintage tear drop! The old magic is still there!
Kawhi Leonard, this big fella, covers ground to get the clutch steal! Wow!
Kawhi Leonard, this giant, finds the trailer! A half-court heave off the assist, easy money!
This established star Stephen Curry sets the back screen! Iron discipline off-ball contribution!
Halftime. The doctor examines Iron Man's shoulder while the others catch their breath. Physio's confession: Iron Man purrs when you massage his calves. Like a cat. A big cat. Second half! The crowd is on its feet, and so are the players.
An off-balance shot! Iron Man cannot be stopped tonight! This undisputed superstar is locked in!
Stephen Curry dribbles in front of the home faithful! A sold-out gym on fire! Beautiful!
Kawhi Leonard posts up the Spalding into the right hands! This legit talent quarterback!
This living legend Jesus Christ refuses to lose! The will of a champion!
Iron Man shares the credit! Team player on and off the court!
Stephen Curry launches his shoe into the air. Anthony Edwards catches it. Standing ovation. I spent the evening explaining basketball rules to my new intern. He still thinks you can walk with the ball. Good night! And now, 'The Bachelor: Stray Cat Edition.' Who will find love in this dumpster?
Matchday 15 — vs Oklahoma City Treasure-Chest
81-123 (L)
Kawhi Leonard opens with a double-clutch layup! This next-level player making an early statement!
This global icon Jesus Christ short-arms a buzzer-beater at half court! Not enough lift!
Iron Man with the backcourt violation! A superhero going backwards with the game!
Stephen Curry reacts too late to rotate! Ego the size of Texas on the help side!
Stephen Curry slams the pill in frustration! Limited stamina on full display!
That's a cut. Anthony Edwards stumbles slightly reaching the locker room. Fun fact: Anthony Edwards is unbeatable at arm wrestling in the locker room. Even the center is scared. Let's go. The arena rumbles, the players answer.
This guy with a proven track record Anthony Edwards misses the mark! A half-court heave goes begging from way beyond the arc!
Jesus Christ, this generational talent, making mistakes from exhaustion! The body is failing!
Jesus Christ with the backcourt violation! This certified GOAT candidate under too much pressure!
Anthony Edwards, this guy with a proven track record, refuses to high-five! Tendency to force bad shots hurting the chemistry!
This global icon Jesus Christ leaves the court with head held high. Fought to the end.
Iron Man rips off his headband and throws it on the ground. Kawhi Leonard picks up his own and folds it carefully. Tonight I had a revelation: Kawhi Leonard runs exactly like my neighbor when he misses the bus. That was beautiful. And now: 'House Hunters International: 90-Square-Foot Studio, Wall View.' A steal.
Berik Serik finishes #3, a fantastic season! 12W-3L. Season MVP: Iron Man.
Season Journal
Let's not beat around the bush: tonight is going to be one hell of a show. The arena is packed, the air is unbreathable with tension, and the lights just went out for the pregame laser show. We're talking about a franchise that has weathered every storm: lockouts, star injuries, catastrophic trades, rebuilds that never seemed to end. And they're still here, standing tall, with the same fire in their belly. This club is a survivor. And when survivors bite, they don't let go. Ladies and gentlemen... Berik Serik!
Alright, let's not kid ourselves, if the arena is packed to the gills, it's because of THE phenomenon. This guy isn't just a basketball player, he's a walking cheat code on the hardwood: give it up for Iron Man! Picture this: standing at 6 cm, but he handles the rock with the agility of a 5'10" point guard and launches missiles from 30 feet like he's at shootaround. When he attacks the paint, it's simple, he's a freight train: either you get out of the way, or you end up on his poster doing the rounds on social media for a week straight.
What kills you about this guy is that he makes basketball look easy. You watch him and you think "well yeah, it's simple." And then you realize the defender in front of him is 6'9", runs a 4.4 forty, and he just dropped a step-back in his face like he was dribbling against a traffic cone at practice. It's not ease, it's absolute mastery disguised as nonchalance. And damn, is it beautiful to watch.
And because this season couldn't possibly be normal, the coach went out and signed Jesus Christ. The man. Is. A messiah. I'm going to let that marinate for two seconds. A messiah. On a professional basketball court. With guys who jump 3 feet off the ground. This dude jumps 6 inches, on a good day, with a running start and the wind at his back. But he's got bare hands and apparently, the technical motion of a messiah and a pull-up jumper are "basically the same thing, give or take 90 degrees." That's what the coach said. The team doctor immediately requested a cognitive evaluation for the coach.
Now we're talking real money. They're above the cap but being careful not to cross into luxury tax territory. They're using their trade exceptions and mid-level to plug the gaps. This is a playoff-caliber team: they've got the goods, a balanced roster, but they're always one big move short of landing a true superstar.
Berik Serik finishes #3, a fantastic season! 12W-3L. Season MVP: Iron Man.
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