Damo — basketball_team 🇺🇸
5 members · TeamBranch
Season Journal
Standings
| # | Team | W | L | Pts |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | Detroit Engine-Roar | 15 | 0 | 30 |
| 2 | Oklahoma City Treasure-Chest | 13 | 2 | 26 |
| 3 | Boston Ring-Chasers | 12 | 3 | 24 |
| 4 | San Antonio Skyscrapers | 11 | 4 | 22 |
| 5 | Cleveland Twin-Towers | 11 | 4 | 22 |
| 6 | Denver Horse-Track | 11 | 4 | 22 |
| 7 | New York Over-Timers | 9 | 6 | 18 |
| 8 | Houston Blast-Off | 7 | 8 | 14 |
| 9 | Minnesota Ice-Wall | 7 | 8 | 14 |
| 10 | Phoenix No-Defense | 5 | 10 | 10 |
| 11 | Toronto Border-Patrol | 5 | 10 | 10 |
| 12 | Los Angeles Nursing-Home | 4 | 11 | 8 |
| 13 | Orlando Magic-Beans | 4 | 11 | 8 |
| 14 | Miami Heart-Attack | 3 | 12 | 6 |
| 15 | Philadelphia Injury-Report | 2 | 13 | 4 |
| 16 | Damo | 1 | 14 | 2 |
Pre-season
Ladies and gentlemen, good evening and welcome to what is probably going to be the most electric night of this season. The arena is packed to the rafters, there are people standing in the corridors, security gave up trying to control anything, and the DJ is blasting so loud the scoreboard is vibrating. We are here to talk about a legendary franchise. A team that has seen sacred monsters pass through, that has lived through dream seasons and nightmare years, that has rebuilt ten times over and always comes back with the same devouring hunger. Ladies and gentlemen... Damo! Alright, let's not kid ourselves, if the arena is packed to the gills, it's because of THE phenomenon. This guy isn't just a basketball player, he's a walking cheat code on the hardwood: give it up for Shaquille O'Neal! Picture this: standing at 216 cm, but he handles the rock with the agility of a 5'10" point guard and launches missiles from 30 feet like he's at shootaround. When he attacks the paint, it's simple, he's a freight train: either you get out of the way, or you end up on his poster doing the rounds on social media for a week straight. You want to know the difference between a good player and a damn franchise player? It's the fourth quarter. When the legs are burning, when the lungs are begging for mercy, when the scoreboard is taunting you with a tight score, that's when he lights up. Like a diesel engine finally hitting its temperature. The first three quarters are the warm-up. The fourth quarter is his hunting ground. And the prey? It's the teams that thought they had a chance. Alright, we need to address the elephant in the room. Or rather, the comedy show on the roster. Michael Collins is on this team. Michael Collins, who is a writer and doesn't even know what "pick-and-roll" means. The guy shows up with their fountain pen under his arm, shoes that are clearly not regulation, and the cardio of a weekend smoker. At his first practice, he tried a crossover and twisted his ankle. At his second, he attempted a layup and the ball flew into the stands. But damn it, what this man has is balls of steel and an ability to make an entire arena laugh without even trying. And that, my friends, is worth every max contract in the world. Budget-wise, they're playing by the rules. Barely. It's clean, but it's tight. You've got one modest star, two or three decent role players, and after that... It's a black hole on the bench. They're trying to build smart without going broke, but every time a player asks for a raise, they start sweating. This is the definition of a "middle of the pack" squad.
Matchday 1 — vs Detroit Engine-Roar
83-118 (L)
This diamond in the rough Steve Rogers comes out aggressive! Opens with a two-handed slam from the right corner!
J. Cole fires a scoop layup from the right corner but can't connect! Heavy feet showing!
This absolute legend Shaquille O'Neal commits the 5-second violation! Clock management shaky emotions under pressure!
Michael Collins caught flat-footed! Standing still, the writer reflexes took a nap!
Shaquille O'Neal, this living legend, with the frustrated foul! Occasional mental lapses in tough moments!
Back in the locker room, J. Cole sits down and stares at the ceiling. Locker room anecdote: J. Cole talks to a sock called 'Assistant Coach.' We don't judge. Both teams retake the hardwood. Everything is still up for grabs.
Brick! Tupac Shakur misfires at half court! Hot head at the worst time!
This living legend Tupac Shakur stumbles! The fatigue is real after this ball game!
J. Cole tries to be too fancy and loses the ball! Defense that's basically a suggestion in the decision-making!
Michael Collins slams the damn ball in frustration! Occasional mental lapses on full display!
This hooper's hooper J. Cole congratulates the opponent. Class in defeat from this hooper's hooper.
Shaquille O'Neal looks like someone who hasn't slept in three days. Michael Collins looks like someone who won't sleep tonight. I spent the evening standing up and sitting down every thirty seconds. My Fitbit is congratulating me. Good evening! Up next: 'Criminal Minds: Finding the Colleague Who Steals Yogurt from the Fridge.'
Matchday 2 — vs Miami Heart-Attack
107-98 (W)
And we're underway! Shaquille O'Neal touches the leather first! This global icon looks eager!
This total unknown Michael Collins finishes with authority! A scoop layup from downtown!
Shaquille O'Neal shuts the door from way beyond the arc! That's how you play defense!
Tupac Shakur unlocks the defense! Picked it apart like an activist on a mission!
Michael Collins pushes the pace in transition! Nerves of steel showing in every play!
Break! J. Cole takes his jersey off before even reaching the locker room. Anecdote of the day: J. Cole forgot his shorts on the last road trip. Played in borrowed shorts two sizes too big. The tunnel spits the players out. The war resumes.
Michael Collins pulls up and drills a finger roll! Can't teach that!
An electric crowd as Shaquille O'Neal, this walking skyscraper, is introduced! Goosebumps!
This player making noise J. Cole unites the locker room! Night-in night-out consistency captain's mentality!
This guy with rings on every finger Tupac Shakur digs deep! Finding reserves nobody knew existed!
Steve Rogers can breathe! The win is secured, it's over!
Tupac Shakur, J. Cole, and Michael Collins pose for a group photo at center court. Nobody has a phone. I spent the evening explaining basketball rules to my new intern. He still thinks you can walk with the ball. See you tomorrow. In the meantime, it's 'Who Wants to Marry My Goldfish.' Good luck with that.
Matchday 3 — vs Orlando Magic-Beans
90-103 (L)
Game time! J. Cole and this established player ready to put on a show at the field house!
Tupac Shakur spins the ball into the front rim! That's frustrating for this absolute legend!
Turnover by Michael Collins! Crafting the untold story requires less coordination, clearly!
Steve Rogers, this versatile guy, fouls unnecessarily at the top of the key! Lack of consistency!
Steve Rogers shoots the basketball with insane court vision. And it drops! Nothing you can do!
Halftime whistle. Shaquille O'Neal flops into the first available chair. Fun fact: Shaquille O'Neal blocked a shot in the finals... And dislocated a thumb celebrating. Classic. The players are back. The court had time to dry, at least.
This hooper's hooper J. Cole gets into it with the opponent! Tempers flaring!
J. Cole, this respected competitor, can't convert the fast break! Wasted opportunity!
Steve Rogers lets fly into the right spacing! Next-level basketball IQ and elite court awareness!
Shaquille O'Neal grabs the shorts! This guy with rings on every finger is running on fumes!
This potential breakout star Michael Collins stares at the scoreboard. Not the outcome this potential breakout star wanted.
Tupac Shakur hurls his water bottle at the wall. J. Cole flinches but doesn't react. During the break, I tried to juggle three balls. My cameraman filmed everything. It'll come out someday. We're done here. Up next: 'Top Chef: Microwave Edition.' Bon appetit.
Matchday 4 — vs Philadelphia Injury-Report
99-103 (L)
J. Cole, this solid pro, embraces the immense pressure! Game on!
Steve Rogers with another buzzer beater! You can't stop this man!
Steve Rogers, this tweener, gets exploited in the switch! Hot head exposed in the mismatch!
J. Cole, this hooper's hooper, comes up empty! An off-balance shot off target in transition!
This household name Tupac Shakur with the three-point play! Comeback special off the pick and roll!
End of the first act. J. Cole is puffing like a steam engine heading back. Small detail: J. Cole whistles the national anthem before every game. Off-key. Consistently off-key. Play resumes! The coach set a few things straight in the locker room.
Steve Rogers, this potential breakout star, air-balls in the first half! The crowd is stunned!
Steve Rogers mutters to himself walking back! This who-is-this-guy player fighting inner demons!
Steve Rogers leaves it all on the floor! This dark horse with unreal swagger effort!
This hall-of-fame lock Shaquille O'Neal misses the free throws! Ego the size of Texas at the line!
Steve Rogers blows past past the media. This potential breakout star not in the mood to talk.
Tupac Shakur pushes away the reporter's microphone with a gesture. J. Cole takes the interview and says 'not tonight'. During the game, I got a text from my mom: 'Stop yelling, I can hear you from here.' She lives 120 miles away. That's it for tonight. Coming up: 'Nailed It: Cakes Ruined by My Mother-in-Law.'
Matchday 5 — vs Phoenix No-Defense
93-120 (L)
This guy with rings on every finger Shaquille O'Neal comes out firing! A half-court heave in the first minute!
Michael Collins throws up a clunker! Their fountain pen would weep at that trajectory!
This living legend Tupac Shakur commits the offensive foul! Turnover at the top of the key!
Tupac Shakur gives up the easy bucket! Easier than rallying the protest march!
J. Cole, this solid pro, operates at the buzzer with a buzzer-beater! Clinic!
Halftime. J. Cole glances at his phone for two seconds and puts it back. Locker room anecdote: J. Cole talks to a sock called 'Assistant Coach.' We don't judge. Back to hostilities. Faces have changed in the locker room.
Michael Collins stares in disbelief! The look of a writer who just lost everything!
J. Cole air-mails a reverse layup from the left corner! Way off for this name that's buzzing!
Tupac Shakur runs the offense! Running it like an activist runs the show!
This unknown gem Steve Rogers can't close out! The legs are shot under the basket!
Michael Collins goes to work to the tunnel in disappointment. This unknown gem will learn from this.
Shaquille O'Neal's complexion is grey. J. Cole's is red. Defeat comes in different colors. Tonight I nearly had a heart attack at least four times. And I'm just the commentator. See you tomorrow! Up next: 'Extreme Reading: The Terms and Conditions.' 4-hour special.
Matchday 6 — vs Los Angeles Nursing-Home
98-105 (L)
J. Cole, this tweener, takes the court! The immense pressure is electric!
J. Cole, this player making noise, with the shot-clock heave! No good driving to the hoop!
J. Cole charges right into the defender! Turnover! Ego the size of Texas when controlling pace!
Shaquille O'Neal falls asleep on the weak side! Limited stamina exposed!
Steve Rogers, this dark horse, drops a deep three driving to the hoop! Pure artistry!
Halftime. Steve Rogers throws his towel on the floor walking in. Juicy intel: Steve Rogers turned down an endorsement deal because he'd have to wear a mascot costume. Act two! The bench players are fired up, the starters too.
Steve Rogers, this tweener, shows negative body language! Defense that's basically a suggestion creeping in!
J. Cole with the contested pull-up jumper at the buzzer! No good! Bad selection!
Michael Collins shoots with purpose every possession! This potential breakout star chess master!
Michael Collins is visibly tired! This player nobody saw coming needs a timeout badly!
Michael Collins looks at the scoreboard one last time! Numbers don't lie for a writer!
Michael Collins snaps at the bench on his way out. J. Cole says nothing, but his look says everything. During the break, I tried to juggle three balls. My cameraman filmed everything. It'll come out someday. Thanks everyone! Up next: 'Ice Road Truckers: Uber Eats Delivery on a Rainy Night.'
Matchday 7 — vs Toronto Border-Patrol
93-114 (L)
Tupac Shakur gets the starting nod! An activist starting with their megaphone confidence!
J. Cole, this all-around player, gets stuffed trying a tear drop! Denied!
Tupac Shakur with the bad read! Misreading the play like misreading the protest march!
Michael Collins left in the dust! Even a writer moves faster than that!
Shaquille O'Neal, this mammoth, overpowers for a fadeaway jumper! Size matters!
The players leave the court. Michael Collins clings to the tunnel railing. Fun fact: Michael Collins tried to patent a celebration after a three-pointer. The application was rejected. Tipoff! The ref blows the whistle, the ball is in the air.
Tupac Shakur is visibly upset! Upset as an activist when the protest march goes sideways!
Michael Collins misfires under the basket! Even this rising star has off nights!
Shaquille O'Neal, this absolute legend, times the cut perfectly! Backdoor for an off-balance shot!
Shaquille O'Neal is running on pure willpower! This generational talent refusing to quit!
Steve Rogers had the chances but couldn't convert. This raw talent left wanting.
Shaquille O'Neal refuses Toronto Border-Patrol's handshake. Michael Collins offers a limp one with just his fingertips. Confession: I bet against my favorite team tonight. Superstition. It works half the time. Good night everyone! Up next: 'Worst Cooks in America: Boiling an Egg Without Breaking It.' Challenge accepted.
Matchday 8 — vs Minnesota Ice-Wall
86-114 (L)
Tupac Shakur, this combo guard, is introduced and the arena explodes! This undisputed superstar is in the building!
This established player J. Cole muscles up a half-court heave but can't get it to fall!
Tupac Shakur fades away the orange right to the defense! Costly mistake by this hall-of-fame lock!
Tupac Shakur gets back-doored! Didn't see it, like not seeing the protest march behind their megaphone!
J. Cole, this seasoned vet, absolutely nails a buzzer-beater at half court! Take a bow!
Into the tunnel. J. Cole grabs a banana on the way and devours it. I've been told J. Cole always puts his left shoe on first. The one day he switched, gave up 40 points. Here they come. You can read the determination on their faces.
Michael Collins drops their shoulders! Deflated, even a writer's spirit has limits!
Michael Collins misses at the buzzer! A writer who missed the deadline!
Tupac Shakur makes the hockey assist! The unsung play of an activist behind the protest march!
Tupac Shakur needs oxygen! More winded than an activist after overtime!
J. Cole, this smooth operator, hangs the head. Tough loss despite unreal swagger effort.
Michael Collins sighs so loudly that the reporters hear it. Steve Rogers winces. Final confession: I still don't know how to pronounce Michael Collins's name. Forgive me. Thanks for being here. Now put down the remote, it's time for 'Wheel of Misfortune.'
Matchday 9 — vs Houston Blast-Off
77-122 (L)
Tip-off! Steve Rogers gets us started! Let's go!
Shaquille O'Neal forces a bad alley-oop! This absolute legend needs to trust teammates!
Shaquille O'Neal dribbles into a trap! Occasional mental lapses when reading the defense!
This total unknown Michael Collins caught ball-watching! Backdoor cut for an easy score!
This rising star Steve Rogers shakes the head in disbelief! Nothing going right!
That's a cut. Shaquille O'Neal stumbles slightly reaching the locker room. Fun fact: Shaquille O'Neal failed the driving test three times. On the court it's a different story, thankfully. The tunnel spits the players out. The war resumes.
Shaquille O'Neal, this certified GOAT candidate, pulls the trigger back to the basket but no luck!
This hungry young player Steve Rogers can barely get up the court! Fatigue setting in!
Michael Collins explodes into a dead end under the basket! Turnover! Limited stamina!
This living legend Shaquille O'Neal slaps the floor in anger! The frustration is palpable!
Shaquille O'Neal, this giant, trudges off the floor. Lessons to take from this one.
Tupac Shakur kicks his towel across the floor. J. Cole has already left for the locker room, alone. During the game, I counted how many times I said 'incredible.' Seventeen. A personal record. That's a wrap! And now, 'The Price Is Right: Why Nobody Answers the Phone Anymore.'
Matchday 10 — vs Denver Horse-Track
86-131 (L)
This up-and-coming baller J. Cole means business! Fast start in the paint!
Michael Collins misses the open look! This guy nobody was talking about can't believe it! Shaky emotions under pressure!
J. Cole, this solid build, commits the travel! Tendency to rush in the footwork!
This first-ballot legend Shaquille O'Neal commits the and-one foul! Hot head in positioning!
Shaquille O'Neal, this household name, yells at the coaching staff! Injury-prone body causing friction!
Players head to the locker room. Michael Collins has tape on three fingers. Fun fact: Michael Collins failed the driving test three times. On the court it's a different story, thankfully. Back at it! The coach said two words. Two words that were enough.
A reverse layup from Steve Rogers sails wide! This dark horse needs to regroup!
Shaquille O'Neal, this walking skyscraper, with tired legs in transition! Shaky emotions under pressure slowing this undisputed superstar down!
Shaquille O'Neal, this giant, telegraphs the pass! Intercepted driving to the hoop!
Tupac Shakur tugs at their jersey! Frustrated, but the activist will bounce back!
J. Cole reflects on what could have been. Occasional mental lapses the difference tonight.
Michael Collins sits on the bench, staring into nothing. Tupac Shakur has his head in his hands. Confession: I nearly fell asleep during the second quarter. The third woke me right up. That's a wrap! And now, the network's masterpiece: 'My Cat, My Battle.' Don't miss the finale.
Matchday 11 — vs New York Over-Timers
77-115 (L)
This hall-of-fame lock Shaquille O'Neal in the starting lineup! Let's see what this hall-of-fame lock brings!
Steve Rogers pulls up but it's well off! Shaky emotions under pressure under fatigue!
This up-and-coming baller J. Cole dribbles off the foot! Unforced error!
Shaquille O'Neal scrambles but can't close out! Open look given up! Shaky emotions under pressure!
Shaquille O'Neal gets a technical for complaining! Lack of consistency on full display!
Intermission. Shaquille O'Neal dumps an entire water bottle over his head. Anecdote: Shaquille O'Neal lost a bet and had to wear the center's shoes during warm-ups. Size 16. Tipoff! The ball bounces, the arena vibrates, we're back.
Shaquille O'Neal gets a clean look but defense that's basically a suggestion costs the bucket!
Michael Collins is gassed! This total unknown bent over at half court! Hot head catching up!
This hall-of-fame lock Shaquille O'Neal with a careless turnover! Gift-wrapped for the opponent!
J. Cole mouths off and picks up a T! Lack of consistency taking over!
J. Cole walks off in silence. This guy with a proven track record gave it all but it wasn't enough.
Shaquille O'Neal walks head down toward the tunnel. Michael Collins drags his feet behind, shoulders slumped. As for me, I powered through three coffees and a gas station sandwich. The glamorous life of sports journalism. Sleep tight! Coming up: 'Forensic Files: Who Finished the Milk Without Telling Anyone.'
Matchday 12 — vs Cleveland Twin-Towers
83-121 (L)
Tupac Shakur bounces the Wilson pre-game! Getting that rhythm going!
The rim rejects Tupac Shakur! The rim says no! Even an activist gets rejected sometimes!
Steve Rogers, this all-around player, gets the ball poked away! Tendency to rush when protecting the Wilson!
Steve Rogers gives up the back door! Lack of consistency when overplaying!
Shaquille O'Neal, this long boy, pounds the scorer's table! Injury-prone body on full display!
Off to the locker room. Steve Rogers has already drained two water bottles. Did you know? Steve Rogers once signed an autograph for a referee. During the game. Mid free-throw. The players are back on the court. Here we go again!
Tupac Shakur, this combo guard, can't finish in the paint! That one stings!
Tupac Shakur soldiers on! The soldier who rallies the protest march with their megaphone!
J. Cole coughs up the damn ball! Occasional mental lapses strikes again in transition!
Tupac Shakur throws their hands up! Like an activist when their megaphone breaks!
Shaquille O'Neal, this generational talent, takes the loss hard. Defense that's basically a suggestion at the wrong moments.
Tupac Shakur stares at the floor while J. Cole mutters something inaudible under his breath. On my end, I discovered the arena's coffee machine was broken. The game nearly went uncommentated. That's all for tonight. And now: 'Deadliest Catch: Rush Hour on the Beltway.' Documentary.
Matchday 13 — vs Boston Ring-Chasers
74-119 (L)
Michael Collins steps onto the temple of basketball! From crafting the untold story to this, game time!
Michael Collins misfires facing the rim! Their fountain pen calibration needed!
This up-and-coming baller J. Cole gets pickpocketed under the basket! Sloppy handling!
Shaquille O'Neal turns the head and loses the man! This generational talent napping defensively!
This legit talent J. Cole hangs the head after the miss! Deflated along the baseline!
Break! Michael Collins has left a puddle of sweat at every step through the tunnel. Anecdote: Michael Collins once wore his jersey inside out for the entire first quarter. Nobody dared say anything. Resumption imminent. The players wrap up their express warm-up.
Michael Collins misses on a clutch free throw! A writer dropping the untold story at the worst time!
J. Cole, this solid build, laboring up and down! Lack of consistency draining the energy!
Steve Rogers, this smooth operator, gets stripped on the low block! Sometimes predictable game exposed!
Michael Collins storms to the bench! Heated! This writer doesn't handle losing well!
Steve Rogers sits alone on the bench. This dude out of nowhere processing the defeat.
Michael Collins slams his fist on the bench. Tupac Shakur places his palm flat, as if to calm the surface. During the third quarter, I spilled my soup. Yes, I had soup in the booth. Don't judge. And now, a brand new episode of 'Desperately Seeking My Cat.' Good night, everyone.
Matchday 14 — vs San Antonio Skyscrapers
73-118 (L)
J. Cole takes off onto the floor! The crowd roars for this solid pro!
Tupac Shakur shoots short! Not enough juice! Even an activist would cringe!
Tupac Shakur, this all-around player, gets called for the carry! Sometimes predictable game in ball-handling!
Tupac Shakur overcommits! Going all-in like an activist on the protest march, but wrong!
Michael Collins looks to the heavens! A writer praying for their fountain pen to work!
End of the second quarter. Shaquille O'Neal is breathing so loud you can hear it from here. Did you know Shaquille O'Neal plays better when it's raining outside? Even indoors. Go figure. We resume. Eyes locked in, jaws clenched.
Michael Collins fires and misses at half court. Should have stuck with the untold story!
Michael Collins misses from fatigue! Tired arms from crafting the untold story all week!
Steve Rogers with a wild pass that sails out! This who-is-this-guy player giving it away!
Tupac Shakur, this living legend, barks at the teammate! Limited stamina taking over!
This legit talent J. Cole tips the hat to the winner. Respect despite the pain.
Steve Rogers's brow is furrowed, lips pressed thin. Tupac Shakur breathes through his nose, hard, steady, trying to calm down. During the game, I counted how many times I said 'incredible.' Seventeen. A personal record. We're done here. Up next: 'Top Chef: Microwave Edition.' Bon appetit.
Matchday 15 — vs Oklahoma City Treasure-Chest
86-131 (L)
Michael Collins, this versatile guy, announced to huge cheers! Wild stands!
Steve Rogers, this smooth operator, loses the handle and the opportunity! Occasional mental lapses!
Michael Collins gets picked! A writer getting the untold story stolen in broad daylight!
Steve Rogers, this do-it-all player, can't keep up with the speed! Tendency to force bad shots exposed!
Steve Rogers, this combo guard, sits down hard on the bench! Limited stamina written all over his face!
Halftime! Michael Collins is limping slightly heading off the court. Fun fact: Michael Collins tried to negotiate a 'mandatory nap' clause in his contract. Denied. Resumption imminent. The players wrap up their express warm-up.
Michael Collins shoots an air ball in a sold-out gym on fire! A writer lost in the noise!
J. Cole, this tweener, is moving in slow motion! Tank is empty!
J. Cole loses the rock in traffic! This name that's buzzing can't afford that!
Michael Collins fires away the towel! This diamond in the rough showing hot head!
This guy nobody was talking about Steve Rogers leaves the arena with head held high. Fought to the end.
Michael Collins's brow is furrowed, lips pressed thin. Steve Rogers breathes through his nose, hard, steady, trying to calm down. Behind the scenes, the cameraman told me I was making faces during free throws. I had no idea. Thanks everyone! Up next: 'Ice Road Truckers: Uber Eats Delivery on a Rainy Night.'
Damo finishes #16 (1W-14L). Better luck next season! MVP: Shaquille O'Neal.
Season Journal
Ladies and gentlemen, good evening and welcome to what is probably going to be the most electric night of this season. The arena is packed to the rafters, there are people standing in the corridors, security gave up trying to control anything, and the DJ is blasting so loud the scoreboard is vibrating. We are here to talk about a legendary franchise. A team that has seen sacred monsters pass through, that has lived through dream seasons and nightmare years, that has rebuilt ten times over and always comes back with the same devouring hunger. Ladies and gentlemen... Damo!
Alright, let's not kid ourselves, if the arena is packed to the gills, it's because of THE phenomenon. This guy isn't just a basketball player, he's a walking cheat code on the hardwood: give it up for Shaquille O'Neal! Picture this: standing at 216 cm, but he handles the rock with the agility of a 5'10" point guard and launches missiles from 30 feet like he's at shootaround. When he attacks the paint, it's simple, he's a freight train: either you get out of the way, or you end up on his poster doing the rounds on social media for a week straight.
You want to know the difference between a good player and a damn franchise player? It's the fourth quarter. When the legs are burning, when the lungs are begging for mercy, when the scoreboard is taunting you with a tight score, that's when he lights up. Like a diesel engine finally hitting its temperature. The first three quarters are the warm-up. The fourth quarter is his hunting ground. And the prey? It's the teams that thought they had a chance.
Alright, we need to address the elephant in the room. Or rather, the comedy show on the roster. Michael Collins is on this team. Michael Collins, who is a writer and doesn't even know what "pick-and-roll" means. The guy shows up with their fountain pen under his arm, shoes that are clearly not regulation, and the cardio of a weekend smoker. At his first practice, he tried a crossover and twisted his ankle. At his second, he attempted a layup and the ball flew into the stands. But damn it, what this man has is balls of steel and an ability to make an entire arena laugh without even trying. And that, my friends, is worth every max contract in the world.
Budget-wise, they're playing by the rules. Barely. It's clean, but it's tight. You've got one modest star, two or three decent role players, and after that... It's a black hole on the bench. They're trying to build smart without going broke, but every time a player asks for a raise, they start sweating. This is the definition of a "middle of the pack" squad.
Damo finishes #16 (1W-14L). Better luck next season! MVP: Shaquille O'Neal.
💬 💬 Comments & Suggestions (0)
💭
No comments yet. Be the first to share your opinion!
Do you like this creation?
Share it with your friends!
.jpg?width=200&width=400)
.jpg?width=200&width=400)