AVOONGERS — basketball_team 🇺🇸
5 members · TeamBranch
Season Journal
Standings
| # | Team | W | L | Pts |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | Oklahoma City Treasure-Chest | 15 | 0 | 30 |
| 2 | Detroit Engine-Roar | 13 | 2 | 26 |
| 3 | San Antonio Skyscrapers | 12 | 3 | 24 |
| 4 | Boston Ring-Chasers | 12 | 3 | 24 |
| 5 | New York Over-Timers | 10 | 5 | 20 |
| 6 | Cleveland Twin-Towers | 9 | 6 | 18 |
| 7 | Denver Horse-Track | 8 | 7 | 16 |
| 8 | AVOONGERS | 7 | 8 | 14 |
| 9 | Houston Blast-Off | 7 | 8 | 14 |
| 10 | Toronto Border-Patrol | 6 | 9 | 12 |
| 11 | Los Angeles Nursing-Home | 6 | 9 | 12 |
| 12 | Minnesota Ice-Wall | 6 | 9 | 12 |
| 13 | Orlando Magic-Beans | 4 | 11 | 8 |
| 14 | Philadelphia Injury-Report | 2 | 13 | 4 |
| 15 | Phoenix No-Defense | 2 | 13 | 4 |
| 16 | Miami Heart-Attack | 1 | 14 | 2 |
Pre-season
Buckle up, pull your visor down, and clench everything you've got because tonight we are NOT talking about some pickup game at the park. Hell no. We're talking about an arena shaking so hard the neighbors called the cops three times before tip-off. We're talking about a franchise built on decades of sweat, tears, heart-stopping buzzer-beaters, and Draft picks so bold that half the league thought they'd lost their minds. And yet, here they are, back and hungrier than ever. Ladies and gentlemen... AVOONGERS! Alright, let's not kid ourselves, if the arena is packed to the gills, it's because of THE phenomenon. This girl isn't just a basketball player, she's a walking cheat code on the hardwood: give it up for Black Widow! Picture this: the woman is massive, but she handles the rock with the agility of a 5'10" point guard and launches missiles from 30 feet like she's at shootaround. When she attacks the paint, it's simple, she's a freight train: either you get out of the way, or you end up on her poster doing the rounds on social media for a week straight. The scary thing is that the more pressure rises, the more she rises with it. Fourth quarter, down by three, the opposing coach screaming, the crowd roaring... And she just shrugs, takes the ball, and nails a step-back three over three defenders draped all over her like it's a Tuesday morning shootaround drill. This is the kind of player you don't just build a team around, you build an era around her. And tonight, that era begins. Hold on tight because the next name is going to make you spit out your beer: Spider-Man. Profession? Superhero. Yeah. The coach saw him on TV, called his agent (who didn't exist), and offered him a ten-day contract "to see." The guy showed up with bare hands, a ham sandwich, and bulletproof enthusiasm. At his first practice, he attempted a dunk and ended up hanging from the net like a cat stuck in a tree. The fire department came. Twice. But he's got heart, the man, and apparently the precision he puts into the game could translate to mid-range shooting. We believe. Well, the coach believes. The rest of us broke out the popcorn. The budget? Look, I've seen GoFundMe campaigns with more money. We're below the salary floor, which means the league is literally going to HAND them cash to hit the legal minimum. It's embarrassing, but it's also a plan: tank hard, finish last, snag the first overall pick, and rebuild. The problem is they've been tanking for three years and never landed the top pick. Bad luck has a name, and it's this damn franchise.
Matchday 1 — vs Detroit Engine-Roar
99-111 (L)
This potential breakout star Steve Rogers comes out firing! A layup in the first minute!
Steve Rogers fires a two-handed slam in transition but can't connect! Hot head showing!
This generational talent Spider-Man with turnover number buckets! Tendency to force bad shots is piling up!
Spider-Man bites on the fake! Fooled like a superhero by counterfeit the game!
Hulk fades away and scores! Those scientist hands work wonders with the leather!
Halftime! Spider-Man is limping slightly heading off the court. Little secret: Spider-Man has a secret TikTok account with 12 followers. Posts cooking tutorials. Second half! The hardwood is about to shake again.
Steve Rogers, this solid build, shows negative body language! Ego the size of Texas creeping in!
Hulk, this all-around player, wastes a golden chance with a wild half-court heave!
Iron Man adjusts the matchup! Finding the right fit, the superhero approach!
Steve Rogers, this dark horse, making mistakes from exhaustion! The body is failing!
Spider-Man walks off in silence. This once-in-a-lifetime player gave it all but it wasn't enough.
Iron Man closes his eyes walking out. Black Widow keeps her wide open, fixed, empty. During the third quarter, I spilled my soup. Yes, I had soup in the booth. Don't judge. Good night! Up next: 'America's Got Talent: Mouth Noises Edition.' The judges are baffled.
Matchday 2 — vs Miami Heart-Attack
125-93 (W)
Hulk comes out hot! Heated up and ready, the scientist means business!
Black Widow finishes with flair! Showmanship of a superhero presenting the game!
Spider-Man sprints to close out! A rebound in traffic in the paint! Great effort!
Black Widow with the hockey assist! That extra pass, beautiful basketball!
Spider-Man uses the hesitation dribble! Ridiculous creativity creating separation!
Halftime. The physio pounces on Steve Rogers to massage his thighs. Word is Steve Rogers sleeps with his basketball shoes on. I can't confirm it, but the source is reliable. We're off again! The crowd chants the team's name.
Black Widow hits nothing but net! Pure as a superhero's work with their bare hands!
Confetti falls as Hulk exits! A scientist's grand finale on the temple of basketball!
Black Widow, this swiss-army-knife type, repositions on defense! Insane court vision collective effort!
What a journey for Spider-Man! From the bench to the spotlight! You love to see it!
Black Widow, this well-respected player, soaks in the moment! Victory from way beyond the arc! A primal scream!
Spider-Man drops to his knees and kisses the court. Iron Man pretends to gag. Fun fact: my sound engineer fell asleep during the second quarter. I woke him with an elbow. Good night everyone! Coming up: 'Boot Camp: Supermarket Checkout Line Edition.' Discipline.
Matchday 3 — vs Orlando Magic-Beans
111-105 (W)
Black Widow goes to work onto the floor! The crowd roars for this respected competitor!
A half-court heave! Hulk cannot be stopped tonight! This all-time great is locked in!
Black Widow contests every shot! Relentless as a superhero with the game!
This league veteran Black Widow with the wraparound pass! How did that get through!
Iron Man shifts the defense! Moving pieces like a superhero at work!
Halftime! Iron Man looks in the mirror and shakes his head. They say Iron Man has a ritual where he touches the basket post three times. If someone watches, starts over. Back on the court. The crowd greets them with a standing ovation.
Spider-Man finishes through contact! Built tough from handling their bare hands!
Black Widow fires away in front of the home faithful! A boiling cauldron! Beautiful!
Spider-Man glues the team together! Team-first mentality, pure superhero instinct!
This raw talent Steve Rogers refuses to lose! The will of a champion!
Iron Man walks off into the sunset! Tomorrow: back to competing the game!
Iron Man cries tears of joy in Hulk's arms. Spider-Man is also crying but nobody knows why. My evening in summary: yell, drink coffee, yell again, spill the coffee, yell some more. See you soon. In the meantime: 'Wipeout: IKEA on a Saturday.' Worse than the actual obstacles.
Matchday 4 — vs Philadelphia Injury-Report
120-104 (W)
Iron Man pulls up into position! This once-in-a-lifetime player not wasting any time!
Steve Rogers converts a tough pull-up jumper at half court! Skill level: elite!
Spider-Man reads the play and picks off the pass! Transition opportunity!
Black Widow hits the trailer! Connecting plays with their bare hands accuracy!
Iron Man spaces the floor! Making room out there like a superhero clears the workspace!
Both teams head to the locker room. Iron Man wipes his forehead with his jersey. Fun fact: Iron Man is unbeatable at arm wrestling in the locker room. Even the center is scared. Resumption imminent. The players wrap up their express warm-up.
Steve Rogers, this newcomer, drops a deep three in transition! Pure artistry!
Hulk, this versatile guy, gets the standing ovation! A hostile crowd!
Steve Rogers dishes the pill with patience! This player nobody saw coming trusting the system!
Black Widow plays like they have something to prove to every superhero watching!
This unknown gem Steve Rogers caps off a special night! A salute to the fans! Until next time!
Iron Man rips the net off the rim. Spider-Man wraps it around his neck like a scarf. My evening? A microphone, cold coffee, and the greatest show on earth. What more could you ask for. Alright, good night! Up next: 'Secret Life of Your Mailman.' Episode 47.
Matchday 5 — vs Phoenix No-Defense
116-94 (W)
Tip-off! Hulk gets us started! Let's go!
Black Widow nails a layup from deep! Range like their bare hands reaching across the workshop!
Black Widow anticipates perfectly! A superhero who always sees it coming!
Iron Man drives and dishes! Gorgeous feed facing the rim! Iron discipline!
Hulk, this solid build, sets a brick-wall screen! Pure God-given talent on full display!
Break! Spider-Man has left a puddle of sweat at every step through the tunnel. Anecdote: Spider-Man slipped on a banana peel during practice. The videos leaked. The internet never forgets. We're off again! The crowd chants the team's name.
Black Widow takes off with the precision of a superhero at work. And it's a buzzer beater!
This hooper's hooper Black Widow acknowledges the fans! A boiling cauldron of mutual respect!
Iron Man holds the huddle together! That superhero leadership on full display!
Steve Rogers, this all-around player, stands tall when the team needs this potential breakout star most!
Black Widow, this swiss-army-knife type, celebrates the win! A slide across the hardwood! What a game!
Spider-Man does a backflip. Well, he tries. Iron Man applauds the effort. Evening confession: I'm wearing Spider-Man's jersey under my shirt. For morale. See you soon. In the meantime: 'Wipeout: IKEA on a Saturday.' Worse than the actual obstacles.
Matchday 6 — vs Los Angeles Nursing-Home
93-104 (L)
This potential GOAT Iron Man gets the crowd going early! The energy is building!
Iron Man dribbles the pill into nothing! Heavy feet on full display tonight!
Black Widow posts up carelessly and gets stripped! Another giveaway!
Steve Rogers reacts too late to rotate! Heavy feet on the help side!
A double-clutch layup from Iron Man! This hall-of-fame lock reminding everyone why they're on top!
Halftime whistle. Black Widow flops into the first available chair. Confession: Black Widow tried yoga. Lasted two sessions before declaring it a combat sport. Here we go. Tactical adjustments have been made.
Black Widow drops their shoulders! Deflated, even a superhero's spirit has limits!
Hulk misses the open look! This undisputed superstar can't believe it! Lack of consistency!
Steve Rogers identifies the soft spot in the zone! This raw talent surgical precision!
Iron Man, this generational talent, sucking wind after that sprint! The 48 regulation minutes of battle!
Black Widow, this dude putting the league on notice, takes the loss hard. Sometimes predictable game at the wrong moments.
Black Widow chews her nails on the bench. Hulk stares at his shoes like they're the source of the problem. Behind the scenes, the cameraman told me I was making faces during free throws. I had no idea. Good night! Up next: 'My 600-Lb Neighbor: He Makes Noise at 3 AM.' Shocking testimonies.
Matchday 7 — vs Toronto Border-Patrol
104-93 (W)
Spider-Man, this low-to-the-ground speedster, sets the tone immediately! Ridiculous creativity from the jump!
Hulk knocks down an off-balance shot at the top of the key! Ice in the veins!
This who-is-this-guy player Steve Rogers with a clutch steal from way beyond the arc! Intimidating!
This basketball god Iron Man creates for others! Unselfish play with unreal swagger!
Spider-Man, this elusive guard, posts up the smaller defender! Mismatch hunting!
The players leave the court. Spider-Man clings to the tunnel railing. Anecdote: Spider-Man threw up before his first pro game. No more pre-game burgers ever since. Let's go. The arena rumbles, the players answer.
Iron Man racks up a catch-and-shoot triple! Productive night for this superhero!
A roaring arena as Spider-Man warms up with some superhero moves!
Spider-Man dishes the pill into the right hands! This global icon quarterback!
Scouts overlooked a superhero. They won't overlook Black Widow after tonight's their bare hands show!
Iron Man heads to the locker room with a smile! Good day at the office for the superhero!
Hulk does a backflip. Well, he tries. Iron Man applauds the effort. I learned backstage that Iron Man also does superhero on weekends. That explains those reflexes. We're done for tonight. And now: 'Ancient Aliens: The True History of the Coffee Break.'
Matchday 8 — vs Minnesota Ice-Wall
101-115 (L)
Black Widow gets the crowd going early! Setting the tone like a superhero on day one!
A bank shot from Steve Rogers catches the back rim and pops out! So close!
Black Widow with the errant pass! This dude putting the league on notice needs to settle down!
Black Widow beaten off the dribble! Quicker than the game slipping from a superhero!
Steve Rogers with the decisive catch-and-shoot triple! Night-in night-out consistency when it matters most!
Break. Black Widow collapses on the locker room floor, arms spread wide. Intel: Black Widow asked Minnesota Ice-Wall for their energy drink recipe. They refused. Break's over, time for basketball. Let's go.
Spider-Man throws their hands up! Like a superhero when their bare hands breaks!
A double-clutch layup from Iron Man goes in and out! Heartbreaking at the buzzer!
Iron Man manages the clock! Time management of a superhero who never misses a deadline!
Iron Man drags their feet! Heavy as their bare hands at the end of a shift!
Spider-Man tips the cap to the winners! The superhero's grace with the game!
Spider-Man leaves the court at a jog. Steve Rogers stays there, planted at center court, motionless. During the break, I tried doing crunches behind the console. My back remembers. That's all for tonight. And now: 'Deadliest Catch: Rush Hour on the Beltway.' Documentary.
Matchday 9 — vs Houston Blast-Off
110-85 (W)
Black Widow, this up-and-coming baller, wins the opening tip! Great start for the team!
Spider-Man converts with authority! Same energy they bring to competing the game!
Spider-Man, this undersized dog, clamps down in the clutch! Elite a charge taken!
Hulk, this do-it-all player, finds the rolling big man! A half-court heave off the assist!
Iron Man iso at the top! Isolating the matchup with superhero focus!
Halftime. Hulk is holding his ribs walking toward the tunnel. Exclusive info: Hulk is banned for life from the McDonald's near the arena. The details remain murky. Both teams retake the floor. The best may be yet to come.
Black Widow scores off the glass! Bank shot precision of a superhero!
The jumbotron shows Hulk's scientist highlight reel! What a career!
Black Widow chains the plays together! Stringing them like a superhero on a roll!
This undisputed superstar Iron Man flips the script! From struggle to dominance!
Final buzzer! Spider-Man is the hero! This basketball god with a game for the ages!
Steve Rogers makes the phone sign toward the opposing bench. Black Widow makes the 'call us' gesture. I spent this game nervously chewing gum. I'm on my seventh piece. Until next time! Up next: 'Kitchen Nightmares: Corporate Cafeteria.' This is gonna be good.
Matchday 10 — vs Denver Horse-Track
113-104 (W)
Spider-Man lands the first buzzer beater! First blood! The superhero strikes first!
A buzzer beater from Steve Rogers! Another dagger! This player nobody saw coming closing the door!
This hall-of-fame lock Iron Man disrupts the play with a timely brilliant anticipation!
Iron Man, this pint-sized baller, drops the dime! Ridiculous creativity passing on display!
Hulk runs the offense! Running it like a scientist runs the show!
Halftime whistle! Steve Rogers slides down against the hallway wall. Fun fact: Steve Rogers got rejected at a casting for a deodorant commercial. The irony. Play resumes. The DJ drops a beat to hype up the crowd.
A double-clutch layup from Iron Man at the buzzer! That's a certified bucket-getter!
Listen to that roar! Steve Rogers lets fly and the place explodes!
Steve Rogers, this diamond in the rough, runs the play exactly as drawn! Execution!
Black Widow, this smooth operator, sets the tone with pure God-given talent! Leader!
Hulk, this potential GOAT, points to the crowd! A victory dance! This was for the fans!
Black Widow and Hulk run circles around Steve Rogers who doesn't move. Zen. Your favorite commentator survived. It's not much, but it's honest work. Good night everyone! Coming up: 'Boot Camp: Supermarket Checkout Line Edition.' Discipline.
Matchday 11 — vs New York Over-Timers
89-105 (L)
Steve Rogers blows past with energy from the opening whistle! This hungry young player locked in!
Black Widow misses! Even a superhero can't fix that shot!
Hulk throws it out of bounds! Like launching their lab notebook into the void!
Steve Rogers, this tweener, gets dunked on along the baseline! Poster material!
Hulk carves through and scores! That's what a scientist does best!
Finally a breather. Iron Man has calf cramps, the physio rushes over. Confession: Iron Man believes the away locker room is haunted. Refuses to go in alone. The players come back running. Did someone set the locker room on fire?
This hidden prospect Steve Rogers stares at the ref! That look could freeze water!
Black Widow misses from the corner! Facing the rim is no place for their bare hands!
Steve Rogers crosses over the ball out of the trap! An unmatched feel for the game under pressure!
Hulk mops their face! Sweating more than when discoverring the hidden truth!
Iron Man had the chances but couldn't convert. This undisputed superstar left wanting.
Steve Rogers stares at his hands like he doesn't recognize them. Hulk exhales. Again. And again. During the game, I counted how many times I said 'incredible.' Seventeen. A personal record. We're packing up. Time for the late-night feature: 'Unsolved Mysteries: Where Is My Left Sock.'
Matchday 12 — vs Cleveland Twin-Towers
98-122 (L)
And we're underway! Hulk touches the Spalding first! This once-in-a-lifetime player looks eager!
Steve Rogers, this swiss-army-knife type, bobbles the Spalding and the chance evaporates in the paint!
Iron Man, this small but mighty player, gets the ball poked away! Heavy feet when protecting the damn ball!
Steve Rogers, this swiss-army-knife type, loses the assignment! Easy bucket over injury-prone body!
This total unknown Steve Rogers with a cold-blooded and-one! No conscience!
Break time. Spider-Man bolts to the locker room without looking at anyone. Anecdote: Spider-Man once wore his jersey inside out for the entire first quarter. Nobody dared say anything. Back on the floor, faces full of determination.
This hooper's hooper Black Widow gets into it with the opponent! Tempers flaring!
Hulk rises up but it's well off! Heavy feet under fatigue!
Hulk sets the screen at the perfect angle! This guy with rings on every finger cerebral play!
This hungry young player Steve Rogers calls for a sub! Can't go anymore! Occasional mental lapses taking its toll!
Steve Rogers dishes past the media. This hidden prospect not in the mood to talk.
Spider-Man pulls his cap down over his eyes. Hulk doesn't have a cap, and it shows. Tonight my colleague told me I smell like stress. I told him it was my cologne. Good evening! Coming up: 'Dancing with the Stars: My Cousin's Wedding Edition.' Open bar.
Matchday 13 — vs Boston Ring-Chasers
92-102 (L)
Steve Rogers looks dialed in from the start! A killer instinct preparation showing!
Spider-Man, this little guy, gets stuffed trying a thunderous slam! Denied!
Steve Rogers with the backcourt violation! This rising star under too much pressure!
Iron Man caught flat-footed! Standing still, the superhero reflexes took a nap!
Black Widow fades away past everyone for a devastating dunk! This versatile guy on a mission!
Halftime whistle! Iron Man grabs a towel and collapses on the bench. Anecdote: Iron Man fell asleep on the bench during an exhibition game. Still got named MVP. We're back! The DJ cranks the volume, the players charge onto the court.
This hall-of-fame lock Iron Man fouls hard out of frustration! Tendency to force bad shots showing!
Iron Man puts up a prayer... Unanswered! Not even their bare hands can save that!
Black Widow blows past to the right spot! Natural-born leadership off-ball movement!
Hulk grabs the jersey for air! Needs more air than their lab notebook in the workshop!
Steve Rogers sits alone on the bench. This potential breakout star processing the defeat.
Iron Man hurls his water bottle at the wall. Steve Rogers flinches but doesn't react. During the break, I tried to juggle three balls. My cameraman filmed everything. It'll come out someday. See you soon. Coming up: 'Extreme Couponing: Family of Eight at Walmart.' Double episode.
Matchday 14 — vs San Antonio Skyscrapers
79-115 (L)
Iron Man gets the starting nod! A superhero starting with their bare hands confidence!
This guy nobody was talking about Steve Rogers puts up an off-balance shot but it won't fall! Off night!
Black Widow, this tweener, commits the travel! Shaky emotions under pressure in the footwork!
Black Widow gets caught flat-footed! This legit talent beaten to the spot!
Spider-Man, this potential GOAT, refuses to high-five! Sometimes predictable game hurting the chemistry!
Back to the locker room. Steve Rogers punches his locker. Anecdote: Steve Rogers fell asleep on the bench during an exhibition game. Still got named MVP. We're back! The players look fired up.
Black Widow with a rough devastating dunk from downtown! Ego the size of Texas at the worst time!
Spider-Man, this scrappy guard, looks exhausted from the left corner! The legs are gone!
Hulk turns it over in the free-throw line! Butterfingers from this scientist!
Hulk glares at the basketball! Like it personally betrayed this scientist!
Black Widow posts up to the tunnel in disappointment. This seasoned vet will learn from this.
Iron Man taps the tunnel wall as if trying to pass through it. Steve Rogers walks through the door without pushing it. Tonight my voice traveled three octaves. Baritone to soprano. Basketball does that to you. Off to bed! And now: 'Jeopardy: Cafeteria Trivia Edition.'
Matchday 15 — vs Oklahoma City Treasure-Chest
90-111 (L)
Black Widow wins the opening tip! Tipping off with superhero energy!
This hooper's hooper Black Widow misses the mark! A euro-step goes begging in the paint!
Spider-Man with the travel! Footwork confusion worthy of a lost superhero!
Steve Rogers lunges the wrong direction! Fake had this player nobody saw coming fooled!
This seasoned vet Black Widow does it again! A bank shot with effortless precision!
Halftime. Hulk throws his towel on the floor walking in. Fun fact: Hulk was voted best-looking player on the team. By his mom. In a poll she created herself. Come on, second half! The best is yet to come. Or the worst. Who knows.
Iron Man slaps the floor in frustration! Slapping harder than a superhero hits the workbench!
Black Widow bobbles and misses! Fumbling the rock like it's a Monday morning!
This raw talent Steve Rogers adjusts the angle mid-drive! Natural-born leadership body control!
This living legend Iron Man signals to the bench! Needs a blow! Injury-prone body!
This player nobody saw coming Steve Rogers shakes hands and moves on. In the end, heavy feet proved costly.
Hulk pulls his cap down over his eyes. Iron Man doesn't have a cap, and it shows. Evening confession: I'm wearing Hulk's jersey under my shirt. For morale. We're done here. Up next: 'Top Chef: Microwave Edition.' Bon appetit.
AVOONGERS ends the season #8 with a 7W-8L record. Season MVP: Black Widow.
Season Journal
Buckle up, pull your visor down, and clench everything you've got because tonight we are NOT talking about some pickup game at the park. Hell no. We're talking about an arena shaking so hard the neighbors called the cops three times before tip-off. We're talking about a franchise built on decades of sweat, tears, heart-stopping buzzer-beaters, and Draft picks so bold that half the league thought they'd lost their minds. And yet, here they are, back and hungrier than ever. Ladies and gentlemen... AVOONGERS!
Alright, let's not kid ourselves, if the arena is packed to the gills, it's because of THE phenomenon. This girl isn't just a basketball player, she's a walking cheat code on the hardwood: give it up for Black Widow! Picture this: the woman is massive, but she handles the rock with the agility of a 5'10" point guard and launches missiles from 30 feet like she's at shootaround. When she attacks the paint, it's simple, she's a freight train: either you get out of the way, or you end up on her poster doing the rounds on social media for a week straight.
The scary thing is that the more pressure rises, the more she rises with it. Fourth quarter, down by three, the opposing coach screaming, the crowd roaring... And she just shrugs, takes the ball, and nails a step-back three over three defenders draped all over her like it's a Tuesday morning shootaround drill. This is the kind of player you don't just build a team around, you build an era around her. And tonight, that era begins.
Hold on tight because the next name is going to make you spit out your beer: Spider-Man. Profession? Superhero. Yeah. The coach saw him on TV, called his agent (who didn't exist), and offered him a ten-day contract "to see." The guy showed up with bare hands, a ham sandwich, and bulletproof enthusiasm. At his first practice, he attempted a dunk and ended up hanging from the net like a cat stuck in a tree. The fire department came. Twice. But he's got heart, the man, and apparently the precision he puts into the game could translate to mid-range shooting. We believe. Well, the coach believes. The rest of us broke out the popcorn.
The budget? Look, I've seen GoFundMe campaigns with more money. We're below the salary floor, which means the league is literally going to HAND them cash to hit the legal minimum. It's embarrassing, but it's also a plan: tank hard, finish last, snag the first overall pick, and rebuild. The problem is they've been tanking for three years and never landed the top pick. Bad luck has a name, and it's this damn franchise.
AVOONGERS ends the season #8 with a 7W-8L record. Season MVP: Black Widow.
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