Poole — basketball_team 🇺🇸
5 members · TeamBranch
Season Journal
Standings
| # | Team | W | L | Pts |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | Oklahoma City Treasure-Chest | 14 | 1 | 28 |
| 2 | Detroit Engine-Roar | 12 | 3 | 24 |
| 3 | Boston Ring-Chasers | 12 | 3 | 24 |
| 4 | San Antonio Skyscrapers | 11 | 4 | 22 |
| 5 | Cleveland Twin-Towers | 11 | 4 | 22 |
| 6 | Denver Horse-Track | 11 | 4 | 22 |
| 7 | Poole | 10 | 5 | 20 |
| 8 | Minnesota Ice-Wall | 7 | 8 | 14 |
| 9 | Houston Blast-Off | 6 | 9 | 12 |
| 10 | New York Over-Timers | 5 | 10 | 10 |
| 11 | Toronto Border-Patrol | 5 | 10 | 10 |
| 12 | Los Angeles Nursing-Home | 4 | 11 | 8 |
| 13 | Phoenix No-Defense | 4 | 11 | 8 |
| 14 | Philadelphia Injury-Report | 3 | 12 | 6 |
| 15 | Orlando Magic-Beans | 3 | 12 | 6 |
| 16 | Miami Heart-Attack | 2 | 13 | 4 |
Pre-season
Stop. Everybody shut up. You feel that? That smell of freshly waxed hardwood, brand-new kicks, and electric tension hanging in the air? That's the smell of a night that's going down in the history books. We're in a building where every seat is taken, every eye is locked on the tunnel where a team that has thrilled generations is about to emerge. Championships, heartbreaks, legendary comebacks, midnight trades that shifted the entire balance of the league... This franchise is a damn novel all by itself. And tonight, we're starting the next chapter. Ladies and gentlemen... Poole! Listen, I've watched hundreds of players come and go in my broadcasting career, but Jordan Poole is something else entirely. He's the kind of player who makes you jump out of your chair and scream "OH SHIT" at your TV without even realizing it. Standing at 193 cm, a wingspan like a pterodactyl, and a killer instinct that even the coaches can't explain. This man feels the game. He knows where the ball is going to land before the shot even leaves the hand. He reads passes like he's reading minds. At this level, it's not basketball anymore, it's straight-up sorcery. His teammate told me something last week that gave me chills. He said: "When he's silent in the locker room before a game, I know we're about to destroy everybody." The man doesn't talk, he executes. He doesn't celebrate, he absorbs. And when the buzzer is approaching and the score is tight, everybody knows. The teammates, the opponents, the refs, the guy selling nachos on the upper deck. Everybody knows the ball is ending up in his hands. And it's ending up in the basket. Alright, we need to address the elephant in the room. Or rather, the comedy show on the roster. Miles Morales is on this team. Miles Morales, who is a superhero and doesn't even know what "pick-and-roll" means. The guy shows up with bare hands under his arm, shoes that are clearly not regulation, and the cardio of a weekend smoker. At his first practice, he tried a crossover and twisted his ankle. At his second, he attempted a layup and the ball flew into the stands. But damn it, what this man has is balls of steel and an ability to make an entire arena laugh without even trying. And that, my friends, is worth every max contract in the world. The budget is simple: it's not a budget anymore, it's a manifesto. The owner said "I don't give a damn about consequences" and he proved it. We're in financial territory that even Adam Silver didn't anticipate when he wrote the rules. Every extra dollar spent costs five dollars in tax, and guess what, they spend WAY too many extra dollars. The roster is an infernal machine, the bench is a thing of beauty, but the price is zero future. No picks, no possible trades, no plan B. It's the championship or a wall at 200 miles per hour. There is no middle ground.
Matchday 1 — vs Detroit Engine-Roar
85-114 (L)
Jordan Poole, this do-it-all player, sets the tone immediately! Unreal swagger from the jump!
This hooper's hooper Jordan Poole muscles up a buzzer-beater but can't get it to fall!
Jordan Poole with the lazy pass! Hot head leading to easy points!
Jordan Poole, this all-around player, gets exploited in the switch! Defense that's basically a suggestion exposed in the mismatch!
Miles Morales punishes the defense! A superhero punishing the game with precision!
Halftime. The doctor examines Jordan Poole's shoulder while the others catch their breath. Fun fact: Jordan Poole is unbeatable at arm wrestling in the locker room. Even the center is scared. Back at it! The players jog toward center court.
Jordan Poole mouths off and picks up a T! Lack of consistency taking over!
Jordan Poole, this dude putting the league on notice, can't convert the fast break! Wasted opportunity!
Jordan Poole sets the screen at the perfect angle! This league veteran cerebral play!
Jordan Poole, this hooper's hooper, sucking wind after that sprint! The allotted time of battle!
Jordan Poole, this name that's buzzing, takes the loss hard. Shaky emotions under pressure at the wrong moments.
Jordan Poole walks head down toward the tunnel. Jordan Poole drags his feet behind, shoulders slumped. I spent this entire evening standing because my chair has been broken for three games. Nobody fixes it. Good night! Up next: 'America's Got Talent: Mouth Noises Edition.' The judges are baffled.
Matchday 2 — vs Miami Heart-Attack
114-100 (W)
This solid pro Jordan Poole catches the rock early and goes to work! Opening salvo!
Miles Morales with the step-back fadeaway jumper! Creating space like a superhero with their bare hands!
Jordan Poole rotates perfectly for the double team! An unmatched feel for the game on full display!
This player on the come-up Jordan Poole connects on the pick-and-roll! Assist for an and-one!
Jordan Poole spaces the floor perfectly! Great read of the system!
The locker room fills up. Miles Morales has already eaten three oranges. Anecdote: Miles Morales slipped on a banana peel during practice. The videos leaked. The internet never forgets. Let's go. The arena rumbles, the players answer.
Jordan Poole, this player on the come-up, operates under the basket with a catch-and-shoot triple! Clinic!
Jordan Poole, this established player, plays to the crowd! A cathedral silence is contagious!
Jordan Poole, this league veteran, communicates the switch! Natural-born leadership and vocal leadership!
Jordan Poole is writing the story tonight! This respected competitor with a layup under the basket!
Miles Morales daps up the opposition! Class act, on and off the court!
Jordan Poole and Miles Morales swing Jordan Poole around by his arms like a carousel. He looks sick. Fun fact: my sound engineer fell asleep during the second quarter. I woke him with an elbow. Good night everyone! Coming up: 'Boot Camp: Supermarket Checkout Line Edition.' Discipline.
Matchday 3 — vs Orlando Magic-Beans
120-95 (W)
Jordan Poole, this seasoned vet, wins the opening tip! Great start for the team!
Jordan Poole fires away the Spalding into an alley-oop! Pure God-given talent shining through!
Jordan Poole with the suffocating defense! This hooper's hooper is a wall out there!
Jordan Poole goes to work and dishes! Gorgeous feed facing the rim! Night-in night-out consistency!
Jordan Poole, this player on the come-up, orchestrates the delay game! Next-level basketball IQ in action!
Halftime! Miles Morales checks his stats on the board and winces. Anecdote: Miles Morales threw up before his first pro game. No more pre-game burgers ever since. And we're off! The energy in the arena just went up a notch.
Miles Morales, this player making noise, sinks an alley-oop with surgical precision along the baseline!
This respected competitor Jordan Poole has the arena rocking! A packed arena off the charts!
Jordan Poole, this seasoned vet, rotates on defense! Freakish explosiveness team commitment!
Jordan Poole has found another gear! This respected competitor shifting into overdrive!
Final buzzer! Jordan Poole is the hero! This player making noise with a game for the ages!
Jordan Poole and Miles Morales play rock-paper-scissors to decide who carries the ball. Jordan Poole loses. On my end, I ate a hot dog so disgusting I'd classify it as a traumatic experience. Off to bed! Or stay for 'Real Housewives of the DMV.' The line is around the block.
Matchday 4 — vs Philadelphia Injury-Report
127-97 (W)
Jordan Poole, this smooth operator, announced to huge cheers! An electric crowd!
An and-one by Jordan Poole! The crowd erupts! Freakish explosiveness personified!
Jordan Poole with the chase-down crucial offensive board! What athleticism!
Jordan Poole, this smooth operator, with the pocket pass! Ridiculous creativity in tight spaces!
Jordan Poole, this versatile guy, positions perfectly for the offensive rebound! Scary good handles!
Halftime! Jordan Poole walks barefoot on the cold tunnel tiles. Anecdote: Jordan Poole lost a bet and had to wear the center's shoes during warm-ups. Size 16. The players charge out of the tunnel. Smells like a comeback.
This respected competitor Jordan Poole with a vintage thunderous slam! The old magic is still there!
Jordan Poole, this tweener, commands a packed arena! The arena belongs to this hooper's hooper!
Jordan Poole, this solid build, anchors the second unit! This guy with a proven track record versatile contributor!
Jordan Poole overcomes the early struggles! This next-level player rising like a phoenix!
Jordan Poole, this dude putting the league on notice, points to the crowd! An ice-cold stare at the opposing bench! This was for the fans!
Jordan Poole slides across the court in his socks while Jordan Poole splashes water on everyone. Tonight my voice traveled three octaves. Baritone to soprano. Basketball does that to you. That's all for today. Up next: 'Dateline: The True Cost of a Cup of Yogurt.' Deep investigation.
Matchday 5 — vs Phoenix No-Defense
121-87 (W)
Jordan Poole takes the floor with that look in his eyes! He came to play tonight!
Miles Morales blows past with the precision of a superhero at work. And it's a buzzer-beater!
Jordan Poole with the alley-oop pass! This do-it-all player throws it up, teammate throws it down!
A devastating dunk from Jordan Poole! Another dagger! This seasoned vet closing the door!
Jordan Poole times it perfectly and rejects the shot! A crucial offensive board at half court!
First half is done. Jordan Poole is chugging Gatorade like it's water. The staff told me Jordan Poole sings in the shower. Badly. Very badly. Play resumes. The DJ drops a beat to hype up the crowd.
Jordan Poole fades away to the rack for a bank shot! Can't contain this smooth operator!
Jordan Poole shoots with confidence! The game is well in hand for this seasoned vet!
Miles Morales keeps their bare hands in their locker for good luck! The superhero charm!
Jordan Poole points to the sky after a buzzer beater! This hooper's hooper in the zone!
Jordan Poole, this league veteran, embraces the teammates! A chest bump! Sweet victory!
Jordan Poole hugs the mascot. Jordan Poole hugs the referee. Awkward. My wife texted me: 'when are you coming home?' I said 'after the game.' That was two hours ago. That's all for tonight! Coming up: 'CSI: Underground Parking Garage.' Riveting stuff.
Matchday 6 — vs Los Angeles Nursing-Home
94-98 (L)
Jordan Poole blows past onto the floor! The crowd roars for this player making noise!
Jordan Poole pulls up and drills a tear drop! Can't teach that!
Jordan Poole reacts too late to rotate! Defense that's basically a suggestion on the help side!
This seasoned vet Jordan Poole misses the mark! An off-balance shot goes begging on the low block!
Jordan Poole, this next-level player, completes the improbable rally! Incredible!
The players leave the court. Jordan Poole clings to the tunnel railing. Confession: Jordan Poole believes the away locker room is haunted. Refuses to go in alone. The players emerge from the tunnel. Stern faces, clenched fists.
Miles Morales called for the travel at the buzzer! Walking away from the game shame!
This next-level player Jordan Poole can't believe the call! Arguing with the ref!
This guy with a proven track record Jordan Poole has that look in the eyes! Watch out! Nerves of steel!
Jordan Poole, this smooth operator, chokes on the big stage! With seconds left on the clock miss!
Jordan Poole blows past past the media. This seasoned vet not in the mood to talk.
Jordan Poole takes a sip of water and spits it right back out. Miles Morales doesn't drink. Throat too tight. On my end, the AC in the booth broke down. I sweated more than Miles Morales. That's a wrap! And now, 'The Price Is Right: Why Nobody Answers the Phone Anymore.'
Matchday 7 — vs Toronto Border-Patrol
128-83 (W)
Miles Morales wins the opening tip! Tipping off with superhero energy!
Jordan Poole, this established player, drills another double-clutch layup in the paint! Automatic!
This well-respected player Jordan Poole finds the open man! Assist and a step-back three!
Jordan Poole hits an off-balance shot! An off-the-charts basketball IQ proving to be the difference tonight!
Miles Morales blocks the layup attempt! A rebound in traffic with their bare hands authority!
Halftime. The doctor examines Jordan Poole's shoulder while the others catch their breath. Word is Jordan Poole sleeps with his basketball shoes on. I can't confirm it, but the source is reliable. Here we go. Tactical adjustments have been made.
This hooper's hooper Jordan Poole punishes the defense with a devastating dunk in transition!
Jordan Poole posts up and it's too easy! The lead is ballooning! Mercy rule!
Jordan Poole, this player making noise, accidentally chest-bumps the ref! Excuse me sir!
Jordan Poole with the ice-cold stare at the opposing bench after the and-one! This player on the come-up is fired up!
It's over! Jordan Poole delivers the goods! This up-and-coming baller walks off a winner!
Miles Morales points both hands at the sky. Jordan Poole points at Miles Morales. Jordan Poole points at the exit. Confession: I nearly fell asleep during the second quarter. The third woke me right up. We're wrapping up the mics. Up next: 'Chopped: Tupperware Lunch at the Office Edition.'
Matchday 8 — vs Minnesota Ice-Wall
106-93 (W)
Tip-off! Jordan Poole gets us started! Let's go!
Jordan Poole dribbles the orange beautifully for a bank shot! What touch!
Miles Morales reads the play perfectly! That superhero brain working overtime!
Jordan Poole, this smooth operator, delivers the entry pass! Beautiful feed into the post!
Miles Morales schemes with the coaching staff! Plotting the next move, true superhero!
Halftime. Jordan Poole's hair is completely soaked, like climbing out of a pool. Locker room intel: Jordan Poole has a tattoo of a basketball hoop on his butt. That's commitment. Second half! The crowd is on its feet, and so are the players.
Jordan Poole with another reverse layup! You can't stop this man!
You can cut the tension with a knife! Wild stands as Jordan Poole steps up!
Jordan Poole sacrifices the body taking the charge! This well-respected player ultimate teammate!
The narrative shifts! Jordan Poole takes control with freakish explosiveness!
This player making noise Jordan Poole secures the win with eyes in the back of the head! Another one in the bag!
Jordan Poole launches his shoe into the air. Miles Morales catches it. Standing ovation. While you were watching the game, I was desperately searching for my pen. Still haven't found it. Alright, good night! Up next: 'Secret Life of Your Mailman.' Episode 47.
Matchday 9 — vs Houston Blast-Off
118-101 (W)
Jordan Poole, this hooper's hooper, embraces the crowd fully behind them! Game on!
Miles Morales knocks down a step-back three at the top of the key! Ice in the veins!
Jordan Poole with the full-court pressure! This name that's buzzing making them uncomfortable!
Miles Morales floats a perfect pass! Floating it with a superhero's soft touch!
Jordan Poole, this all-around player, exploits the mismatch driving to the hoop! Smart play!
Off to the locker room. Jordan Poole has already drained two water bottles. Anecdote: Jordan Poole tried to impress the Houston Blast-Off players with a warm-up dunk. Hit the rim. With his face. Break's over, the players take their positions.
This legit talent Jordan Poole with a picture-perfect thunderous slam! The crowd goes wild!
A cathedral silence fills the arena! This seasoned vet Jordan Poole feeds off the energy!
Jordan Poole dribbles the Wilson with patience! This player on the come-up trusting the system!
This dude putting the league on notice Jordan Poole with a performance for the ages! A show of force chapter!
Jordan Poole, this versatile guy, takes the final bow! A bench mob celebration! Dominant display!
Jordan Poole does the robot at center court while Jordan Poole pretends to be an airplane. The crowd loves it. On my end, the AC in the booth broke down. I sweated more than Jordan Poole. Alright, good evening! Now it's 'Love Is in the Parking Lot.' Romance guaranteed.
Matchday 10 — vs Denver Horse-Track
105-115 (L)
This next-level player Jordan Poole gets the crowd going early! The energy is building!
Jordan Poole fires a buzzer beater driving to the hoop but can't connect! Occasional mental lapses showing!
Jordan Poole with a wild pass that sails out! This player making noise giving it away!
Miles Morales caught flat-footed! Standing still, the superhero reflexes took a nap!
Jordan Poole, this combo guard, dominates facing the rim and puts up a layup! Unstoppable!
Halftime! Jordan Poole walks barefoot on the cold tunnel tiles. Fun fact: Jordan Poole tried to patent a celebration after a three-pointer. The application was rejected. The arena lights up, the players are back. Game on.
Jordan Poole, this hooper's hooper, refuses to high-five! Occasional mental lapses hurting the chemistry!
Jordan Poole, this tweener, gets the look from way beyond the arc but the lid's on the rim!
Jordan Poole rises up to the right spot! Scary good handles off-ball movement!
Jordan Poole, this swiss-army-knife type, laboring up and down! Shaky emotions under pressure draining the energy!
Miles Morales consoles teammates! The heart of a superhero in that moment!
Jordan Poole walks head down toward the tunnel. Miles Morales drags his feet behind, shoulders slumped. Confession: I nearly fell asleep during the second quarter. The third woke me right up. Good evening! Up next: 'Criminal Minds: Finding the Colleague Who Steals Yogurt from the Fridge.'
Matchday 11 — vs New York Over-Timers
116-91 (W)
Miles Morales crosses over with energy from the opening whistle! This established player locked in!
Miles Morales converts in transition! A bucket with trademark ridiculous creativity!
Miles Morales, this miniature missile, alters the shot! A gym-rat work ethic at the rim!
Jordan Poole, this name that's buzzing, manipulates the defense and drops the dime! A gym-rat work ethic!
Jordan Poole, this do-it-all player, seals the defender for position! Fundamentals!
Halftime. Jordan Poole throws his towel on the floor walking in. Juicy anecdote: Jordan Poole was caught dancing the Macarena in the showers. Alone. Back for seconds. The court is shining, and so are the players.
Jordan Poole, this league veteran, drops a bank shot in the paint! Pure artistry!
Jordan Poole, this solid pro, waves the crowd up! An electric crowd rising!
Jordan Poole puts ego aside! The team comes first for this solid pro!
Jordan Poole explodes with purpose! Natural-born leadership driving this team forward!
That's the game! Jordan Poole finishes with a monster performance! This legit talent victorious!
Jordan Poole mimes popping a champagne bottle. Jordan Poole mimes chugging straight from it. Your favorite commentator survived. It's not much, but it's honest work. That's all for tonight. And now: 'Deadliest Catch: Rush Hour on the Beltway.' Documentary.
Matchday 12 — vs Cleveland Twin-Towers
113-107 (W)
This player on the come-up Jordan Poole in the starting lineup! Let's see what this player on the come-up brings!
Jordan Poole, this combo guard, overpowers for a finger roll! Size matters!
Miles Morales contests the shot! Reaching like a superhero reaching for the game!
Jordan Poole rises up the ball through traffic! What a pass by this name that's buzzing!
This next-level player Jordan Poole sets the back screen! A gym-rat work ethic off-ball contribution!
Heading in. Miles Morales's eyes are bloodshot from sheer effort. Confession: Miles Morales believes the away locker room is haunted. Refuses to go in alone. We're back! Flushed cheeks and hungry eyes on the players.
A reverse layup from Jordan Poole! This league veteran reminding everyone why they're on top!
Listen to that roar! Jordan Poole explodes and the place explodes!
Jordan Poole, this solid pro, runs the play exactly as drawn! Execution!
Jordan Poole attacks into the record books! This up-and-coming baller making memories!
Jordan Poole, this all-around player, celebrates the win! A slide across the hardwood! What a game!
Jordan Poole hugs the mascot. Jordan Poole hugs the referee. Awkward. Tonight I lost my voice, rediscovered my passion, and forgot where I parked. A complete evening. Until next time! Up next: 'Life Unplugged: A Day Without WiFi.' A shocking documentary.
Matchday 13 — vs Boston Ring-Chasers
106-111 (L)
Game time! Jordan Poole and this next-level player ready to put on a show at the floor!
Jordan Poole scores with a gym-rat work ethic. A finger roll from downtown! Too smooth!
Jordan Poole gets caught flat-footed! This guy with a proven track record beaten to the spot!
Jordan Poole with a wild attempt! This hooper's hooper not finding the range tonight!
This seasoned vet Jordan Poole rallies the troops! The team feeds off night-in night-out consistency!
Back to the locker room. Jordan Poole punches his locker. Confession: Jordan Poole tried yoga. Lasted two sessions before declaring it a combat sport. We're back! The players look fired up.
Jordan Poole throws it away with the game on the line! Limited stamina!
Jordan Poole glares at the scoreboard! This dude putting the league on notice not happy with the situation!
This will be talked about for years! Jordan Poole with a free throw! Iconic!
Jordan Poole, this hooper's hooper, commits the late turnover! Shaky emotions under pressure with the ball!
Jordan Poole had the chances but couldn't convert. This respected competitor left wanting.
Jordan Poole bites his lip, fists clenched. Jordan Poole shakes his head slowly, in disbelief. I drank so much coffee tonight I'm going to commentate in my sleep. See you at the next game! In the meantime: 'Pawn Stars: Selling a Pen Without a Cap.'
Matchday 14 — vs San Antonio Skyscrapers
108-107 (W)
Jordan Poole lets fly into position! This dude putting the league on notice not wasting any time!
Miles Morales a clutch steal at the critical moment! A gym-rat work ethic right on cue!
Jordan Poole, this league veteran, with the shot-clock heave! No good along the baseline!
Jordan Poole, this combo guard, takes over facing the rim. An and-one! That's elite!
Jordan Poole, this versatile guy, posts up the smaller defender! Mismatch hunting!
The players head in. Jordan Poole slips on the wet tunnel floor. Little secret: Jordan Poole listens to Celine Dion to focus. I repeat, Celine Dion. The hardwood awaits. Here we go for the second half.
Jordan Poole shoots past the defender! A pull-up jumper in the clutch! Incredible!
Jordan Poole, this solid build, walls off the drive facing the rim! No way through!
Miles Morales attacks in front of the home faithful! Palpable tension! Beautiful!
This league veteran Jordan Poole with nerves of steel! A two-handed slam when it matters most!
Jordan Poole, this player making noise, high-fives the bench! A salute to the fans! Team effort!
Jordan Poole and Miles Morales stare at each other in silence for five seconds. Then burst out laughing at the exact same time. Tonight my colleague told me I smell like stress. I told him it was my cologne. That's it. Up next: 'Anthony Bourdain Visits: The Park-and-Ride in Poughkeepsie.' Culture shock.
Matchday 15 — vs Oklahoma City Treasure-Chest
81-110 (L)
Jordan Poole, this do-it-all player, takes the court! The sold-out gym on fire is electric!
Jordan Poole, this all-around player, bobbles the leather and the chance evaporates driving to the hoop!
Stolen from Miles Morales! A superhero who let it slip through their fingers!
Jordan Poole, this combo guard, can't keep up with the speed! Sometimes predictable game exposed!
Jordan Poole dishes away from the huddle! This legit talent in a dark place mentally!
Well-deserved break. Jordan Poole looks like someone who just ran a marathon. Did you know? Jordan Poole once signed an autograph for a referee. During the game. Mid free-throw. Jump ball to restart. Let the second half begin!
Jordan Poole with the off-balance step-back three! This seasoned vet couldn't set the feet!
Jordan Poole, this up-and-coming baller, making mistakes from exhaustion! The body is failing!
This guy with a proven track record Jordan Poole with turnover number lengths ahead! Defense that's basically a suggestion is piling up!
Jordan Poole drives angrily after the turnover! This up-and-coming baller spiraling!
Jordan Poole walks off in silence. This seasoned vet gave it all but it wasn't enough.
Jordan Poole pushes away the reporter's microphone with a gesture. Miles Morales takes the interview and says 'not tonight'. I spent the evening explaining basketball rules to my new intern. He still thinks you can walk with the ball. That's all for tonight. And now: 'Deadliest Catch: Rush Hour on the Beltway.' Documentary.
Poole ends the season #7 with a 10W-5L record. Season MVP: Jordan Poole.
Season Journal
Stop. Everybody shut up. You feel that? That smell of freshly waxed hardwood, brand-new kicks, and electric tension hanging in the air? That's the smell of a night that's going down in the history books. We're in a building where every seat is taken, every eye is locked on the tunnel where a team that has thrilled generations is about to emerge. Championships, heartbreaks, legendary comebacks, midnight trades that shifted the entire balance of the league... This franchise is a damn novel all by itself. And tonight, we're starting the next chapter. Ladies and gentlemen... Poole!
Listen, I've watched hundreds of players come and go in my broadcasting career, but Jordan Poole is something else entirely. He's the kind of player who makes you jump out of your chair and scream "OH SHIT" at your TV without even realizing it. Standing at 193 cm, a wingspan like a pterodactyl, and a killer instinct that even the coaches can't explain. This man feels the game. He knows where the ball is going to land before the shot even leaves the hand. He reads passes like he's reading minds. At this level, it's not basketball anymore, it's straight-up sorcery.
His teammate told me something last week that gave me chills. He said: "When he's silent in the locker room before a game, I know we're about to destroy everybody." The man doesn't talk, he executes. He doesn't celebrate, he absorbs. And when the buzzer is approaching and the score is tight, everybody knows. The teammates, the opponents, the refs, the guy selling nachos on the upper deck. Everybody knows the ball is ending up in his hands. And it's ending up in the basket.
Alright, we need to address the elephant in the room. Or rather, the comedy show on the roster. Miles Morales is on this team. Miles Morales, who is a superhero and doesn't even know what "pick-and-roll" means. The guy shows up with bare hands under his arm, shoes that are clearly not regulation, and the cardio of a weekend smoker. At his first practice, he tried a crossover and twisted his ankle. At his second, he attempted a layup and the ball flew into the stands. But damn it, what this man has is balls of steel and an ability to make an entire arena laugh without even trying. And that, my friends, is worth every max contract in the world.
The budget is simple: it's not a budget anymore, it's a manifesto. The owner said "I don't give a damn about consequences" and he proved it. We're in financial territory that even Adam Silver didn't anticipate when he wrote the rules. Every extra dollar spent costs five dollars in tax, and guess what, they spend WAY too many extra dollars. The roster is an infernal machine, the bench is a thing of beauty, but the price is zero future. No picks, no possible trades, no plan B. It's the championship or a wall at 200 miles per hour. There is no middle ground.
Poole ends the season #7 with a 10W-5L record. Season MVP: Jordan Poole.
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