My dream starting five — basketball_team 🇺🇸
5 members · TeamBranch
Season Journal
Standings
| # | Team | W | L | Pts |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | Detroit Engine-Roar | 14 | 1 | 28 |
| 2 | Oklahoma City Treasure-Chest | 14 | 1 | 28 |
| 3 | San Antonio Skyscrapers | 13 | 2 | 26 |
| 4 | Boston Ring-Chasers | 11 | 4 | 22 |
| 5 | Cleveland Twin-Towers | 9 | 6 | 18 |
| 6 | Houston Blast-Off | 9 | 6 | 18 |
| 7 | Denver Horse-Track | 9 | 6 | 18 |
| 8 | New York Over-Timers | 8 | 7 | 16 |
| 9 | Minnesota Ice-Wall | 7 | 8 | 14 |
| 10 | Phoenix No-Defense | 7 | 8 | 14 |
| 11 | Orlando Magic-Beans | 6 | 9 | 12 |
| 12 | Toronto Border-Patrol | 4 | 11 | 8 |
| 13 | Los Angeles Nursing-Home | 4 | 11 | 8 |
| 14 | Miami Heart-Attack | 2 | 13 | 4 |
| 15 | My Team | 2 | 13 | 4 |
| 16 | Philadelphia Injury-Report | 1 | 14 | 2 |
Pre-season
Buckle up, pull your visor down, and clench everything you've got because tonight we are NOT talking about some pickup game at the park. Hell no. We're talking about an arena shaking so hard the neighbors called the cops three times before tip-off. We're talking about a franchise built on decades of sweat, tears, heart-stopping buzzer-beaters, and Draft picks so bold that half the league thought they'd lost their minds. And yet, here they are, back and hungrier than ever. The team with no name, baby! If you paid for your ticket tonight, there's one reason and one reason only, and that reason's name is Ben Wallace. Standing at 206 cm, marathon-runner cardio, and surgeon's hands. This man catches a ball mid-flight the way you grab the remote off the couch. Except he follows it up with a spin move, a step-back, and a 30-footer that doesn't even touch the rim. Nothing but net. Every single time. Like the basket is magnetized to the damn ball. The worst part? His ice-cold composure. The clock shows 0.8 seconds, the whole building is holding its breath, the ball is burning in his hands... And he flashes a little smirk before draining the game-winner with sickening ease. He's the engine, the brain, and the heartbeat of that locker room. If he sneezes, the whole damn franchise catches a cold. Tonight, he's on a mission, and believe me, he didn't show up to mess around. Attention, things are about to get serious. Actually no, things are about to go completely off the rails. The front office signed Barack Obama. The man is a community organizer. Yes, you heard that right. A community organizer. On a basketball court. With their bullhorn in his gym bag and zero understanding of what a pick-and-roll is. The coach says it's a "bet on raw athleticism" but between us, I'm pretty sure he lost a poker bet. Barack Obama had his first practice yesterday and asked if the free throw line was home plate. The teammates are dying laughing, the fans don't know whether to cry or applaud, and the GM was spotted updating his resume on LinkedIn. Budget-wise, they're playing by the rules. Barely. It's clean, but it's tight. You've got one modest star, two or three decent role players, and after that... It's a black hole on the bench. They're trying to build smart without going broke, but every time a player asks for a raise, they start sweating. This is the definition of a "middle of the pack" squad.
Matchday 1 — vs Detroit Engine-Roar
74-119 (L)
Bo Bassett starts in the playmaker! Playing the playmaker way a wrestler plays with the rosin bag!
Jesus Christ misses the triple! Three-pointers aren't like triple-checking the game!
Bo Bassett with a wild pass that sails out! This hidden prospect giving it away!
Bo Bassett gets posterized! A wrestler framed by the rosin bag in the worst way!
Batman slaps the floor in frustration! Slapping harder than a superhero hits the workbench!
Halftime whistle. Jesus Christ spits into the trash can walking into the locker room. True story: Jesus Christ walked into the wrong locker room during his first game against Detroit Engine-Roar. Awkward. Both teams retake the floor. The best may be yet to come.
Ben Wallace shoots but overcooks it! Limited stamina showing up again!
Batman is gassed! More tired than after a full day of competing the game!
Batman loses the damn ball! A superhero would never be this careless!
Ben Wallace, this 7-footer, throws the hands up! Exasperated driving to the hoop!
This solid pro Ben Wallace congratulates the opponent. Class in defeat from this solid pro.
Jesus Christ chews his nails on the bench. Ben Wallace stares at his shoes like they're the source of the problem. Your commentator lost his press badge during the game. I had to climb over a barrier. Good evening! Now: 'Destination Unknown: The Roundabout in Scranton, PA.' Total adventure.
Matchday 2 — vs Miami Heart-Attack
83-128 (L)
Bo Bassett stretches center court! Loosening up, the wrestler is getting ready!
This name that's buzzing Ben Wallace puts up a sky hook but it won't fall! Off night!
Batman, this swiss-army-knife type, fumbles the entry pass at the top of the key!
Barack Obama gets burned on the drive! Ego the size of Texas in lateral movement!
This respected competitor Ben Wallace fouls hard out of frustration! Shaky emotions under pressure showing!
Break! Ben Wallace has left a puddle of sweat at every step through the tunnel. Word is Ben Wallace sleeps with his basketball shoes on. I can't confirm it, but the source is reliable. The players jog toward the court. The air is electric.
Batman, this versatile guy, can't finish at the top of the key! That one stings!
Barack Obama misses the rotation! Too tired, like a community organizer too tired for the neighborhood!
Bo Bassett with the careless pass! Slamming the mat canvas with more care, please!
Bo Bassett mouths off on a clutch free throw! A wrestler venting about the mat canvas!
This up-and-coming baller Ben Wallace leaves the palace of hoops with head held high. Fought to the end.
Jesus Christ stares at his hands like he doesn't recognize them. Batman exhales. Again. And again. My chair squeaked the entire game. Everyone thinks it was me. It was not me. Until next time! Up next: 'Life Unplugged: A Day Without WiFi.' A shocking documentary.
Matchday 3 — vs Orlando Magic-Beans
95-122 (L)
This guy with rings on every finger Batman comes out aggressive! Opens with a deep three facing the rim!
Barack Obama can't finish! The community organizer who finishes the neighborhood can't finish the play!
Bo Bassett forces the pass! Forcing the rosin bag where it doesn't fit!
Bo Bassett can't stay in front! Slamming the mat canvas doesn't build lateral quickness!
Bo Bassett tallies another one! This wrestler keeps racking them up!
Into the tunnel. Ben Wallace grabs a banana on the way and devours it. True story: Ben Wallace had his parking spot stolen by Orlando Magic-Beans's mascot. Still talks about it. Both teams return. You can tell the coach gave them an earful.
Ben Wallace, this guy with a proven track record, with the frustrated foul! Defense that's basically a suggestion in tough moments!
Barack Obama, this versatile guy, gets the separation but can't finish! Sometimes predictable game!
This undisputed superstar Barack Obama runs the pick-and-pop to perfection! Tactical mastery!
This player on the come-up Ben Wallace is a warrior but the body says no! The 48 regulation minutes of war!
Jesus Christ sits on the bench post-game! Sitting like a messiah after their bare hands broke!
Ben Wallace pulls his cap down over his eyes. Jesus Christ doesn't have a cap, and it shows. During the game, I got a text from my mom: 'Stop yelling, I can hear you from here.' She lives 120 miles away. Good night! And now, 'The Bachelor: Stray Cat Edition.' Who will find love in this dumpster?
Matchday 4 — vs Philadelphia Injury-Report
105-97 (W)
Bo Bassett sets the tone early! The wrestler came to play tonight!
Batman with an and-one on the break! Running like they're late for work!
This once-in-a-lifetime player Jesus Christ comes up with a massive steal! Transition time!
This guy with a proven track record Ben Wallace finds the open man! Assist and a tear drop!
Ben Wallace, this dude putting the league on notice, manages the clock beautifully in the first quarter!
Halftime whistle. Bo Bassett high-fives his teammates on the way out. Anecdote: Bo Bassett fell asleep on the bench during an exhibition game. Still got named MVP. Back to hostilities. Faces have changed in the locker room.
Ben Wallace with another bank shot! You can't stop this man!
Bo Bassett soaks in a crowd fully behind them! A wrestler savoring life beyond the rosin bag!
This franchise cornerstone Batman runs the basketball patiently! Searching for the perfect shot!
Batman's work ethic? Forged by the superhero life, perfected on the court!
Barack Obama launches in triumph! The final buzzer sounds! That's a W!
Batman blows a kiss to the camera. Barack Obama blows twelve. Jesus Christ blocks the lens. On my end, I ate peanuts through the entire third quarter. Salt is my drug of choice. Good night everyone! Coming up: 'Boot Camp: Supermarket Checkout Line Edition.' Discipline.
Matchday 5 — vs Phoenix No-Defense
86-131 (L)
Bo Bassett, this unknown gem, embraces the cathedral silence! Game on!
Jesus Christ can't hit from the elbow! That zone is cursed for this messiah!
Ben Wallace throws it into the stands! What was that from this seasoned vet!
Batman gives up the easy bucket! Easier than competing the game!
Batman waves off the play! The authority of a superhero in that gesture!
Halftime. Bo Bassett is holding his ribs walking toward the tunnel. Fun fact: Bo Bassett tried to patent a celebration after a three-pointer. The application was rejected. The players are back. The court had time to dry, at least.
Batman gets a clean look but tendency to force bad shots costs the bucket!
Ben Wallace lets fly sluggishly! Defense that's basically a suggestion catching up with this dude putting the league on notice!
Barack Obama commits the live-ball turnover! Their bullhorn would be ashamed!
Batman mouths off and picks up a T! Sometimes predictable game taking over!
Jesus Christ explodes to the tunnel in disappointment. This franchise cornerstone will learn from this.
Jesus Christ's brow is furrowed, lips pressed thin. Batman breathes through his nose, hard, steady, trying to calm down. Fun fact: my sound engineer fell asleep during the second quarter. I woke him with an elbow. Sleep tight! Coming up: 'Forensic Files: Who Finished the Milk Without Telling Anyone.'
Matchday 6 — vs Los Angeles Nursing-Home
100-93 (W)
Batman fires up the crowd to open the game! This franchise cornerstone starting strong!
Batman hooks it in! The arc of a superhero swinging their bare hands!
Jesus Christ recovers and blocks! That's the hustle of someone who works for a living!
Ben Wallace, this absolute unit, with the pocket pass! That dawg mentality in tight spaces!
This respected competitor Ben Wallace switches defensive assignments on the fly! Scary good handles!
Break. Batman collapses on the locker room floor, arms spread wide. Little secret: Batman listens to Celine Dion to focus. I repeat, Celine Dion. Back to business. The players bounce around to warm up.
Batman with a euro-step off the screen! Read that play like a textbook!
An electric crowd is electric when Jesus Christ has the basketball! A messiah charging the room!
Barack Obama executes the play call! Flawless execution from this community organizer!
This respected competitor Ben Wallace channels the inner champion! An unmatched feel for the game at its peak!
This once-in-a-lifetime player Jesus Christ wraps up a sensational performance! Victory is sweet!
Jesus Christ blows a kiss to the camera. Batman blows twelve. Bo Bassett blocks the lens. As for me, I powered through three coffees and a gas station sandwich. The glamorous life of sports journalism. Thanks everyone. Up next: 'Survivor: Open-Plan Office.' Whoever makes it through the 5 PM meeting wins.
Matchday 7 — vs Toronto Border-Patrol
77-116 (L)
Batman locks eyes with the opponent! The stare of a superhero who means business!
Batman can't buy a bucket! Maybe the game would be easier to aim!
Ben Wallace passes to nobody! This established player with a head-scratching decision!
Jesus Christ can't contain the drive! Competing the game is more containable!
Jesus Christ drops their shoulders! Deflated, even a messiah's spirit has limits!
Break! Bo Bassett takes his jersey off before even reaching the locker room. Juicy intel: Bo Bassett turned down an endorsement deal because he'd have to wear a mascot costume. Come on, second half! The best is yet to come. Or the worst. Who knows.
Bo Bassett forces a double-clutch layup on the low block! This hidden prospect trying too hard!
Jesus Christ, this all-around player, is drenched in sweat! Emptying the tank!
Ben Wallace rises up carelessly and gets stripped! Another giveaway!
Jesus Christ is visibly upset! Upset as a messiah when the game goes sideways!
Jesus Christ packs up and heads out! Packing their bare hands, unpacking emotions!
Batman unclasps his chain and squeezes it in his fist. Ben Wallace runs a hand down his face. Tonight I yelled so loud the guy in the next booth asked me to keep it down. Mid-game. Good night! Up next: 'My 600-Lb Neighbor: He Makes Noise at 3 AM.' Shocking testimonies.
Matchday 8 — vs Minnesota Ice-Wall
89-134 (L)
Jesus Christ, this living legend, draws first blood! A two-handed slam to start!
A scoop layup by Bo Bassett back to the basket is way off! Tough night for this diamond in the rough!
Batman double-dribbles! Competing the game doesn't have that rule!
Jesus Christ loses the battle in the paint! Being a messiah doesn't help you here!
Bo Bassett throws their hands up! Like a wrestler when the rosin bag breaks!
The players leave the court. Barack Obama clings to the tunnel railing. Intel: Barack Obama asked Minnesota Ice-Wall for their energy drink recipe. They refused. Come on, second half! The best is yet to come. Or the worst. Who knows.
Barack Obama misfires! The community organizer's precision with the neighborhood is nowhere to be found!
Ben Wallace asks for the ball to slow the pace! This respected competitor needs air!
Ben Wallace throws it away! Limited stamina under pressure driving to the hoop!
Barack Obama storms to the bench! This hall-of-fame lock is visibly upset!
Bo Bassett walks off in defeat! Even a wrestler's skills couldn't save tonight!
Batman pulls his cap down over his eyes. Jesus Christ doesn't have a cap, and it shows. During halftime, I tried to interview the mascot. It ignored me. I'll recover eventually. Thanks for watching this game. And now: 'Deal or No Deal: Office Fridge Edition.'
Matchday 9 — vs Houston Blast-Off
92-114 (L)
Barack Obama opens with a finger roll! This basketball god making an early statement!
Batman with the ugly miss! The superhero touch is absent tonight!
Ben Wallace with the lazy pass! Defense that's basically a suggestion leading to easy points!
Barack Obama, this smooth operator, loses the assignment! Easy bucket over shaky emotions under pressure!
Batman pulls up at the top of the key with the same confidence they bring to competing the game.
Back to the locker room. Ben Wallace punches his locker. Little scoop: Ben Wallace tried to bribe the DJ to play his song. The DJ agreed. Nobody liked it. Back for the second half. The coach slammed his fist on the table.
This dark horse Bo Bassett shakes the head in disbelief! Nothing going right!
A reverse layup from Bo Bassett hits the iron! Heavy feet under the spotlight!
Barack Obama overloads one side! Loading up with community organizer strategy!
Batman misses from fatigue! Tired arms from competing the game all week!
Bo Bassett takes the loss hard! Hard as the mat canvas on a bad wrestler day!
Jesus Christ slams his fist on the bench. Batman places his palm flat, as if to calm the surface. While you were watching the game, I was desperately searching for my pen. Still haven't found it. That's it for tonight. Coming up: 'Nailed It: Cakes Ruined by My Mother-in-Law.'
Matchday 10 — vs Denver Horse-Track
79-114 (L)
This dude putting the league on notice Ben Wallace in the starting lineup! Let's see what this dude putting the league on notice brings!
Batman launches and misses! The Spalding isn't the game, and it shows!
Jesus Christ, this do-it-all player, telegraphs the pass! Intercepted at the buzzer!
Barack Obama loses their assignment! Like losing their bullhorn in the workshop!
Barack Obama glares at the rock! Like it personally betrayed this community organizer!
Break! Jesus Christ heads straight to the bathroom moment he hits the locker room. Did you know Jesus Christ once tried to start an ASMR podcast of sneaker squeaks on the hardwood? One episode. Deleted. The players charge out of the tunnel. Smells like a comeback.
Batman bricks another one! Building something awful with their bare hands tonight!
Ben Wallace is visibly tired! This player making noise needs a timeout badly!
Batman with the backcourt violation! This undisputed superstar under too much pressure!
Bo Bassett shoots angrily after the turnover! This newcomer spiraling!
Jesus Christ tips the cap to the winners! The messiah's grace with the game!
Batman is the last one off the court, shoulders hunched. Jesus Christ waits at the tunnel entrance. I spent the evening explaining basketball rules to my new intern. He still thinks you can walk with the ball. Good night! Up next: 'My 600-Lb Neighbor: He Makes Noise at 3 AM.' Shocking testimonies.
Matchday 11 — vs New York Over-Timers
98-116 (L)
Bo Bassett takes the floor with that look in his eyes! He came to play tonight!
Ben Wallace, this beanpole, loses the handle and the opportunity! Lack of consistency!
Ben Wallace coughs up the pill! Sometimes predictable game strikes again from mid-range!
Ben Wallace, this absolute unit, gets exploited in the switch! Tendency to rush exposed in the mismatch!
Batman drops a step-back three from the high post! Range that would impress any superhero!
The players file out. Bo Bassett exchanges a tense look with the coach. Did you know Bo Bassett entered the dunk contest... At 5'9"? Courage knows no height. Back on the court. The crowd greets them with a standing ovation.
Barack Obama, this all-time great, barks at the teammate! Limited stamina taking over!
This newcomer Bo Bassett muscles up a bank shot but can't get it to fall!
Jesus Christ manages the clock! Time management of a messiah who never misses a deadline!
Bo Bassett bends over during the dead ball! This raw talent gathering what's left!
Ben Wallace had the chances but couldn't convert. This player on the come-up left wanting.
Barack Obama lets out a nervous laugh that sends chills down your spine. Jesus Christ decides not to comment. During the game, I got a text from my mom: 'Stop yelling, I can hear you from here.' She lives 120 miles away. That was beautiful. And now: 'House Hunters International: 90-Square-Foot Studio, Wall View.' A steal.
Matchday 12 — vs Cleveland Twin-Towers
86-131 (L)
This diamond in the rough Bo Bassett comes out firing! A fadeaway jumper in the first minute!
Brick! Ben Wallace misfires in transition! Heavy feet at the worst time!
Bo Bassett throws it away! A pass worse than a wrestler tossing the mat canvas!
This potential breakout star Bo Bassett caught ball-watching! Backdoor cut for an easy score!
Barack Obama pounds the scorer's table! Frustrated! The community organizer in them is showing!
The locker room fills up. Ben Wallace has already eaten three oranges. Little secret: Ben Wallace has a secret TikTok account with 12 followers. Posts cooking tutorials. Let's go, we're back. The crowd claps in rhythm.
Barack Obama throws up a clunker! Their bullhorn would weep at that trajectory!
Barack Obama is spent! Used up like the neighborhood after a community organizer's long day!
This potential breakout star Bo Bassett forces a pass into double coverage! Picked off!
Bo Bassett vents at their teammates! The wrestler who vents about the mat canvas!
Jesus Christ attacks past the media. This potential GOAT not in the mood to talk.
Batman's eyes are red, jaw tight. Jesus Christ apologizes to the coach, voice cracking. Yours truly held it together all evening without a bathroom break. That's professionalism. Good night everyone! Coming up: 'Boot Camp: Supermarket Checkout Line Edition.' Discipline.
Matchday 13 — vs Boston Ring-Chasers
74-118 (L)
The floor welcomes Barack Obama! The community organizer with the neighborhood has arrived!
Barack Obama goes 0 for the quarter! A community organizer having a rough shift with their bullhorn!
Bo Bassett, this versatile guy, gets the ball poked away! Occasional mental lapses when protecting the Wilson!
Jesus Christ fouls trying to recover! Desperate as a messiah chasing the game!
Barack Obama steps back and kicks the stanchion! This hall-of-fame lock losing composure!
Halftime! Barack Obama has the hardwood pattern imprinted on his elbow. Did you know? Barack Obama once signed an autograph for a referee. During the game. Mid free-throw. Act two! The bench players are fired up, the starters too.
Bo Bassett can't buy a bucket! Another miss on the low block! Frustrating!
Ben Wallace drives but the legs won't cooperate! Tendency to force bad shots catching up!
Jesus Christ with the errant pass! This all-time great needs to settle down!
Bo Bassett buries their face! Hidden from view, the wrestler can't watch!
Ben Wallace, this up-and-coming baller, takes the loss hard. Limited stamina at the wrong moments.
Bo Bassett lets out a big exhale walking through the door. Barack Obama holds his in. Final confession: I still don't know how to pronounce Bo Bassett's name. Forgive me. That's all for tonight! Coming up: 'CSI: Underground Parking Garage.' Riveting stuff.
Matchday 14 — vs San Antonio Skyscrapers
90-134 (L)
This next-level player Ben Wallace opens the scoring! A buzzer beater! Early advantage!
Bo Bassett misfires from the right corner! Even this rising star has off nights!
Batman dribbles it off their foot! Their bare hands would never betray a superhero like that!
Ben Wallace turns the head and loses the man! This guy with a proven track record napping defensively!
Batman dunks the towel! This basketball god showing injury-prone body!
The players file out. Jesus Christ exchanges a tense look with the coach. Fun fact: Jesus Christ tried to patent a celebration after a three-pointer. The application was rejected. Play resumes. The DJ drops a beat to hype up the crowd.
Ben Wallace air-mails a finger roll from mid-range! Way off for this respected competitor!
This basketball god Jesus Christ can't close out! The legs are shot in the paint!
This next-level player Ben Wallace gets pickpocketed on the low block! Sloppy handling!
Batman can't hide the frustration! Their bare hands frustration meets the damn ball frustration!
Batman sits alone on the bench. This undisputed superstar processing the defeat.
Bo Bassett chews his nails on the bench. Barack Obama stares at his shoes like they're the source of the problem. My chair squeaked the entire game. Everyone thinks it was me. It was not me. Good evening! Up next: 'Criminal Minds: Finding the Colleague Who Steals Yogurt from the Fridge.'
Matchday 15 — vs Oklahoma City Treasure-Chest
84-129 (L)
Batman steps onto the hardwood! From competing the game to this, game time!
Barack Obama can't find the range! Their bullhorn has better accuracy than that!
Jesus Christ gets picked! A messiah getting the game stolen in broad daylight!
Ben Wallace reacts too late to rotate! Heavy feet on the help side!
Bo Bassett can't mask the disappointment! This total unknown wearing it on the sleeve!
Break! Barack Obama has left a puddle of sweat at every step through the tunnel. They say Barack Obama has a ritual where he touches the basket post three times. If someone watches, starts over. We resume. Eyes locked in, jaws clenched.
Barack Obama fires away but the shot rims out! Hot head rears its ugly head!
Batman digs deep! Deep as a superhero digs into the game!
This once-in-a-lifetime player Barack Obama with turnover number points! Limited stamina is piling up!
Batman kicks the air! The frustration of a superhero who knows they can do better!
This hungry young player Bo Bassett shakes hands and moves on. In the end, occasional mental lapses proved costly.
Jesus Christ hurls his water bottle at the wall. Barack Obama flinches but doesn't react. Did you know that Barack Obama practices messiah on Tuesdays? Builds character, that does. Good evening! Up next: 'Fixer Upper: Renovating a Studio on a Twelve-Dollar Budget.' Challenge accepted.
My Team finishes #15 (2W-13L). Better luck next season! MVP: Ben Wallace.
Season Journal
Buckle up, pull your visor down, and clench everything you've got because tonight we are NOT talking about some pickup game at the park. Hell no. We're talking about an arena shaking so hard the neighbors called the cops three times before tip-off. We're talking about a franchise built on decades of sweat, tears, heart-stopping buzzer-beaters, and Draft picks so bold that half the league thought they'd lost their minds. And yet, here they are, back and hungrier than ever. The team with no name, baby!
If you paid for your ticket tonight, there's one reason and one reason only, and that reason's name is Ben Wallace. Standing at 206 cm, marathon-runner cardio, and surgeon's hands. This man catches a ball mid-flight the way you grab the remote off the couch. Except he follows it up with a spin move, a step-back, and a 30-footer that doesn't even touch the rim. Nothing but net. Every single time. Like the basket is magnetized to the damn ball.
The worst part? His ice-cold composure. The clock shows 0.8 seconds, the whole building is holding its breath, the ball is burning in his hands... And he flashes a little smirk before draining the game-winner with sickening ease. He's the engine, the brain, and the heartbeat of that locker room. If he sneezes, the whole damn franchise catches a cold. Tonight, he's on a mission, and believe me, he didn't show up to mess around.
Attention, things are about to get serious. Actually no, things are about to go completely off the rails. The front office signed Barack Obama. The man is a community organizer. Yes, you heard that right. A community organizer. On a basketball court. With their bullhorn in his gym bag and zero understanding of what a pick-and-roll is. The coach says it's a "bet on raw athleticism" but between us, I'm pretty sure he lost a poker bet. Barack Obama had his first practice yesterday and asked if the free throw line was home plate. The teammates are dying laughing, the fans don't know whether to cry or applaud, and the GM was spotted updating his resume on LinkedIn.
Budget-wise, they're playing by the rules. Barely. It's clean, but it's tight. You've got one modest star, two or three decent role players, and after that... It's a black hole on the bench. They're trying to build smart without going broke, but every time a player asks for a raise, they start sweating. This is the definition of a "middle of the pack" squad.
My Team finishes #15 (2W-13L). Better luck next season! MVP: Ben Wallace.
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