aussie buccaneers — basketball_team 🇺🇸
5 members · TeamBranch
Season Journal
Standings
| # | Team | W | L | Pts |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | Detroit Engine-Roar | 14 | 1 | 28 |
| 2 | San Antonio Skyscrapers | 12 | 3 | 24 |
| 3 | Oklahoma City Treasure-Chest | 11 | 4 | 22 |
| 4 | Boston Ring-Chasers | 11 | 4 | 22 |
| 5 | aussie buccaneers | 11 | 4 | 22 |
| 6 | Cleveland Twin-Towers | 10 | 5 | 20 |
| 7 | New York Over-Timers | 8 | 7 | 16 |
| 8 | Toronto Border-Patrol | 8 | 7 | 16 |
| 9 | Denver Horse-Track | 6 | 9 | 12 |
| 10 | Houston Blast-Off | 6 | 9 | 12 |
| 11 | Orlando Magic-Beans | 6 | 9 | 12 |
| 12 | Phoenix No-Defense | 5 | 10 | 10 |
| 13 | Los Angeles Nursing-Home | 3 | 12 | 6 |
| 14 | Minnesota Ice-Wall | 3 | 12 | 6 |
| 15 | Philadelphia Injury-Report | 3 | 12 | 6 |
| 16 | Miami Heart-Attack | 3 | 12 | 6 |
Pre-season
Holy shit, the arena is erupting and the game hasn't even started. There are 20,000 absolute maniacs on their feet chanting the name of a franchise with more scars than a retired boxer. Seasons of domination, seasons of total demolition, insane 3 AM trades, Draft picks that smelled like either genius or pure madness, nobody knew at the time, and honestly sometimes we still don't. But tonight, all of that is behind us. Tonight is the present, and the present reeks of adrenaline and revenge. Ladies and gentlemen... Aussie buccaneers! Yeah sure, it's a team sport, we all agree on that. But when you've got Yao Ming on your roster, the word "team" basically means him plus four guys who pass him the ball. Standing at 229 cm, a first step more explosive than a rocket launch, and a fadeaway so silky that even the defenders applaud as they watch him score. Scouts had this dude flagged at 14. By 16, he was beating pros. Today? He's embarrassing them. But what truly terrifies opponents isn't his highlights, it's his head. Look into his eyes during crunch time. There's nothing there. No stress, no doubt, just a killer's stare that says "give me the ball and get the hell out of the way." Opposing coaches have tried double-teams, triple-teams, zone defense, trash talk, Hack-a-Shaq... Nothing works. The man is programmed for clutch moments. It's genetic, and there's not a damn thing anyone can do about it. Attention, things are about to get serious. Actually no, things are about to go completely off the rails. The front office signed Albert Einstein. The man is an inventor. Yes, you heard that right. An inventor. On a basketball court. With their prototype sketch in his gym bag and zero understanding of what a pick-and-roll is. The coach says it's a "bet on raw athleticism" but between us, I'm pretty sure he lost a poker bet. Albert Einstein had his first practice yesterday and asked if the free throw line was home plate. The teammates are dying laughing, the fans don't know whether to cry or applaud, and the GM was spotted updating his resume on LinkedIn. The budget is like the guy who goes to a restaurant, looks at the menu, orders one entree and splits the dessert. It's not poverty, but it's not the high life either. They've got a decent roster, nobody's complaining, but nobody's saying "damn, what a squad" either. Solid without being spectacular. The kind of team that beats you on a Tuesday and you've forgotten about them by Wednesday morning. But underestimate them and they'll make you pay.
Matchday 1 — vs Detroit Engine-Roar
96-123 (L)
Tip-off! Angel Reese gets us started! Let's go!
Yao Ming, this oversized freak, wastes a golden chance with a wild buzzer-beater!
Angel Reese dishes into a trap! Ego the size of Texas when reading the defense!
Hulk gets posted up and scored on! This basketball god overpowered!
A hook shot from Angel Reese! This player nobody saw coming is putting on a show tonight!
Off to the locker room. Albert Einstein has already drained two water bottles. Little secret: Albert Einstein watches cat videos between quarters. Says it's relaxing. Here we go. Tactical adjustments have been made.
Albert Einstein tugs at their jersey! Frustrated, but the inventor will bounce back!
Bonnie Blue heaves and misses! Should have heaved the game instead!
Bonnie Blue steps back the ball out of the trap! Next-level basketball IQ under pressure!
Angel Reese short-arms the shot from fatigue! This raw talent has nothing left!
Albert Einstein shakes hands through the pain! An inventor who respects their prototype sketch and the game!
Hulk replays the score in his head on a loop. Angel Reese tries to think about something else. During halftime, I tried to interview the mascot. It ignored me. I'll recover eventually. Thanks for the game! And now, tonight's feature film: 'Fast and Furious 47: The Quest for a Parking Spot.'
Matchday 2 — vs Miami Heart-Attack
108-92 (W)
Bonnie Blue goes to work onto the floor! The crowd roars for this dark horse!
Angel Reese with an incredible fadeaway jumper from the left corner! Standing ovation!
Albert Einstein with the chase-down commanding rebound! What athleticism!
Hulk dishes a beautiful pass! Special delivery from this scientist!
Albert Einstein uses an aggressive small-ball lineup brilliantly! Strategy from revolutionizing the status quo!
Break! Bonnie Blue takes her jersey off before even reaching the locker room. Juicy intel: Bonnie Blue turned down an endorsement deal because she'd have to wear a mascot costume. Resetting the counters for this second half. Well, not really.
Angel Reese converts a tough double-clutch layup at the top of the key! Skill level: elite!
Angel Reese, this tweener, basks in a boiling cauldron! This is home!
Bonnie Blue, this scrappy guard, sets the perfect screen! A killer instinct for the team!
This is the Yao Ming game! This big-name player taking over in the second half!
Yao Ming, this big-name player, points to the crowd! A salute to the fans! This was for the fans!
Albert Einstein runs the full court high-fiving everyone. Hulk follows doing the wave alone. Fun fact: my sound engineer fell asleep during the second quarter. I woke him with an elbow. See you tomorrow! Up next: 'Extreme Reading: The Terms and Conditions.' 4-hour special.
Matchday 3 — vs Orlando Magic-Beans
109-96 (W)
This rising star Angel Reese comes out firing! A half-court heave in the first minute!
Yao Ming, this established star, drills another layup at the top of the key! Automatic!
Hulk, this do-it-all player, alters the shot! Iron discipline at the rim!
Bonnie Blue delivers in transition! Fast delivery, like a tv host with their bare hands!
This unknown gem Angel Reese recognizes the over-help and punishes it!
Halftime whistle! Albert Einstein slides down against the hallway wall. Anecdote: Albert Einstein tried to impress the Orlando Magic-Beans players with a warm-up dunk. Hit the rim. With his face. Play resumes! The coach set a few things straight in the locker room.
Bonnie Blue goes coast to coast for a deep three! This diamond in the rough is relentless!
What an immense pressure! Angel Reese and the fans creating a spectacle!
Yao Ming sprints back on defense! This headliner leading by example!
What a journey for Angel Reese! From the bench to the spotlight! You love to see it!
Bonnie Blue tips their hat! The tv host salute! Pure class!
Yao Ming gives his headband to a kid in the crowd. Albert Einstein gives his shoes. Hulk gives his water bottle. The kid is overwhelmed. On my end, the AC in the booth broke down. I sweated more than Albert Einstein. That's it for tonight. Coming up: 'True Confessions: I Put Ketchup on Pasta.'
Matchday 4 — vs Philadelphia Injury-Report
113-106 (W)
Yao Ming opens with a hook shot! This All-Star caliber talent making an early statement!
Hulk pulls up and drills a two-handed slam! Can't teach that!
Angel Reese, this versatile guy, locks down the attacker! Freakish explosiveness on the defensive end!
Angel Reese, this all-around player, finds the trailer! A bank shot off the assist, easy money!
Hulk outsmarts the opponent! The brains of a scientist with their lab notebook!
Break! Albert Einstein rips his shoes off the second he reaches the locker room. The staff told me Albert Einstein sings in the shower. Badly. Very badly. We resume. Eyes locked in, jaws clenched.
Yao Ming knocks down a scoop layup off the pick and roll! Ice in the veins!
A roaring arena fills the arena! This guy nobody was talking about Angel Reese feeds off the energy!
This unknown gem Angel Reese swings the Spalding around! Scary good handles ball movement!
Yao Ming, this absolute unit, carries the weight of the team on those shoulders!
Angel Reese grabs the game ball! This raw talent earned it tonight!
Yao Ming does a belly slide on the court. Albert Einstein does a back slide. The hardwood is ruined. I learned tonight that Yao Ming used to be a tv host. That explains the unique running style. Thanks for being here. Now put down the remote, it's time for 'Wheel of Misfortune.'
Matchday 5 — vs Phoenix No-Defense
115-78 (W)
This headliner Yao Ming gets the crowd going early! The energy is building!
Albert Einstein, this smooth operator, overpowers for a fadeaway jumper! Size matters!
Yao Ming with the incredible court vision! This max-contract guy sees passes nobody else does!
This dude out of nowhere Bonnie Blue is automatic back to the basket! An off-balance shot drops again!
Angel Reese, this all-around player, recovers and contests! Never-give-up effort fueled by natural-born leadership!
The players disappear. Bonnie Blue has a makeshift neck brace out of a towel. They say Bonnie Blue has a ritual where she touches the basket post three times. If someone watches, starts over. And we're off! The energy in the arena just went up a notch.
Angel Reese, this total unknown, operates from mid-range with an alley-oop! Clinic!
Yao Ming, this titan, is toying with the opposition at the top of the key! Dominant!
Yao Ming, this long boy, steps on the teammate's foot! Down goes this guy everybody knows!
Angel Reese points to the sky after a euro-step! This who-is-this-guy player in the zone!
What a game for Albert Einstein! Tomorrow's the status quo will feel easy after this!
Albert Einstein does a handstand. Angel Reese holds him by the feet. The crowd holds its breath. Tonight I had a revelation: Angel Reese runs exactly like my neighbor when he misses the bus. That's it for tonight. Coming up: 'Nailed It: Cakes Ruined by My Mother-in-Law.'
Matchday 6 — vs Los Angeles Nursing-Home
117-87 (W)
Albert Einstein bounces the Spalding pre-game! Getting that rhythm going!
Albert Einstein, this versatile guy, dominates back to the basket and puts up a deep three! Unstoppable!
This surprise package Bonnie Blue forces the air ball with pressure! Suffocating!
Yao Ming threads the needle! Beautiful assist on the low block! Unreal court vision!
Albert Einstein directs traffic on the gymnasium! Traffic control by an inventor with the status quo!
Rest time. Yao Ming isolates in a corner of the locker room, headphones on. Confession: Yao Ming calls mom after every loss. And every win. And also on Tuesdays. Back at it! The players jog toward center court.
This total unknown Bonnie Blue does it again! A deep three with effortless precision!
The crowd waves their lab notebook replicas! Hulk has started a movement!
Hulk, this versatile guy, holds the team together with that dawg mentality! Captain!
Hulk, this franchise cornerstone, delivers a moment of pure grace! Wisdom and poise!
Hulk seals the win! Sealed tight, the scientist gets it done!
Yao Ming and Albert Einstein stare at each other in silence for five seconds. Then burst out laughing at the exact same time. I spent the evening looking for a stat that couldn't be found. It didn't exist. I made one up. Good night everyone! Up next: 'Worst Cooks in America: Boiling an Egg Without Breaking It.' Challenge accepted.
Matchday 7 — vs Toronto Border-Patrol
127-91 (W)
Angel Reese, this smooth operator, takes the court! The standing ovation is electric!
A devastating dunk by Albert Einstein! The crowd erupts! Freakish explosiveness personified!
Yao Ming fades away and dishes! Gorgeous feed from downtown! Silky smooth technique!
Bonnie Blue dunks the rock with pure God-given talent. And it drops! Nothing you can do!
Hulk contests the shot! Reaching like a scientist reaching for the hidden truth!
Break! Angel Reese has left a puddle of sweat at every step through the tunnel. Little scoop: Angel Reese logs every game in a notebook. With stars and smiley faces. At that age. The tunnel spits the players out. The war resumes.
Hulk adds to the total! A scientist who always exceeds expectations!
Yao Ming, this colossus, makes it look like practice! Total domination!
Bonnie Blue shoots the free throw and hits the top of the backboard! Yikes!
Albert Einstein taps the logo on the jersey! A team high-five! That's pride right there!
This global icon Hulk walks off to a standing ovation! A Finals-like atmosphere! Incredible!
Yao Ming, Bonnie Blue, and Albert Einstein pose for a group photo at center court. Nobody has a phone. During the third quarter, I spilled my soup. Yes, I had soup in the booth. Don't judge. See you soon. Coming up: 'Extreme Couponing: Family of Eight at Walmart.' Double episode.
Matchday 8 — vs Minnesota Ice-Wall
117-95 (W)
Hulk starts in the defensive anchor! Playing the defensive anchor the way a scientist plays with their lab notebook!
Angel Reese steps back through traffic and scores! Incredible finish!
Angel Reese, this tweener, swats it into the third row! A ball recovery!
This dark horse Angel Reese finds the open man! Assist and a devastating dunk!
This once-in-a-lifetime player Hulk with the savvy veteran play! Ridiculous creativity experience showing!
Halftime whistle! Yao Ming slides down against the hallway wall. Rumor has it Yao Ming tried to recruit the pizza delivery guy for the team. The guy was 6'9". We're back! The players look fired up.
Bonnie Blue fades away past everyone for a euro-step! This pocket rocket on a mission!
The fans sense it coming! The energy is building as Yao Ming gets hot!
Albert Einstein sacrifices the body taking the charge! This household name ultimate teammate!
Bonnie Blue spins with conviction! This diamond in the rough believes tonight is the night!
Game over! Albert Einstein proved an inventor belongs on the venue with their prototype sketch!
Hulk does a belly slide on the court. Angel Reese does a back slide. The hardwood is ruined. I spent this entire evening standing because my chair has been broken for three games. Nobody fixes it. We're out. Up next: 'Say Yes to the Dress: Budget Three Fifty, Theme: Elastic.' Good luck.
Matchday 9 — vs Houston Blast-Off
106-100 (W)
Hulk comes out hot! Heated up and ready, the scientist means business!
Hulk drives and delivers a finger roll! Their lab notebook by day, buckets by night!
Bonnie Blue makes the stop! Stopping power of a tv host in full force!
Yao Ming with the outlet pass! Coast-to-coast assist! Next-level basketball IQ on that one!
Angel Reese, this smooth operator, positions perfectly for the offensive rebound! An unmatched feel for the game!
Break! Angel Reese rips her shoes off the second she reaches the locker room. Anecdote: Angel Reese tried to impress the Houston Blast-Off players with a warm-up dunk. Hit the rim. With her face. The players jog toward the court. The air is electric.
Bonnie Blue hits the mid-range! The sweet spot, just like their bare hands placement!
Listen to that roar! Albert Einstein takes off and the place explodes!
Angel Reese celebrates the team's success! This newcomer knows together is better!
Albert Einstein is the people's champion! An inventor for the people, the status quo for all!
Albert Einstein wraps up an incredible performance! Wrapped up tight, the inventor delivered!
Angel Reese grabs the PA announcer's mic and shouts Yao Ming's name. The announcer chases her. Did you know that Yao Ming practices tv host on Tuesdays? Builds character, that does. That's a wrap! And now, the network's masterpiece: 'My Cat, My Battle.' Don't miss the finale.
Matchday 10 — vs Denver Horse-Track
106-91 (W)
This diamond in the rough Angel Reese catches the damn ball early and goes to work! Opening salvo!
Angel Reese hits a thunderous slam! Scary good handles proving to be the difference tonight!
Angel Reese, this combo guard, covers ground to get the sky-high block! Wow!
Hulk, this first-ballot legend, drives and kicks! Perfect assist for a buzzer beater!
Hulk goes to work to the right spot! A killer instinct off-ball movement!
Halftime whistle. Yao Ming spits into the trash can walking into the locker room. Exclusive info: Yao Ming is banned for life from the McDonald's near the arena. The details remain murky. The arena lights up, the players are back. Game on.
Hulk gets the friendly bounce! Even the orange respects a scientist!
The DJ plays Hulk's walkout music! Sounds like their lab notebook in rhythm!
Hulk draws the attention! Magnetic presence, the scientist aura is undeniable!
Yao Ming, this headliner, has the crowd in the palm of the hand! A roaring arena!
Hulk, this do-it-all player, celebrates the win! A primal scream! What a game!
Albert Einstein pretends to plant a flag at center court. Hulk stands at attention. During the game, my colleague ordered sushi. It arrived at the final buzzer. Perfect timing. Thanks everyone. Up next: 'Survivor: Open-Plan Office.' Whoever makes it through the 5 PM meeting wins.
Matchday 11 — vs New York Over-Timers
107-106 (W)
This max-contract guy Yao Ming opens the scoring! A double-clutch layup! Early advantage!
Bonnie Blue shuts down the lane! Closed for business, like a tv host closing the game!
Albert Einstein, this living legend, with the shot-clock heave! No good from downtown!
A two-handed slam from Yao Ming! This All-Star caliber talent reminding everyone why they're on top!
Albert Einstein controls the glass! Board work as precise as a day job with their prototype sketch!
Both teams head in. Bonnie Blue has a red mark on her cheek from an elbow. Fun fact: Bonnie Blue tried to negotiate a 'mandatory nap' clause in her contract. Denied. Jump ball to restart. Let the second half begin!
Bonnie Blue buries the go-ahead shot! Ice cold, this tv host doesn't flinch!
Hulk blocks from behind! Came outta nowhere like a scientist on a mission!
This unknown gem Angel Reese has the arena rocking! A hostile crowd off the charts!
This established star Yao Ming with nerves of steel! A layup when it matters most!
Final buzzer! Angel Reese is the hero! This player nobody saw coming with a game for the ages!
Bonnie Blue drops to her knees and kisses the court. Albert Einstein pretends to gag. Tonight my colleague told me I smell like stress. I told him it was my cologne. Until next time! Up next: 'Life Unplugged: A Day Without WiFi.' A shocking documentary.
Matchday 12 — vs Cleveland Twin-Towers
104-106 (L)
Angel Reese looks dialed in from the start! Nerves of steel preparation showing!
Bonnie Blue scores on the putback! Recycling the game is second nature for a tv host!
Yao Ming, this walking skyscraper, loses the assignment! Easy bucket over limited stamina!
Angel Reese takes a tough step-back three and it doesn't go! Lack of consistency in shot selection!
This surprise package Angel Reese ignites the rally! The deficit is shrinking!
The players disappear. Albert Einstein has a makeshift neck brace out of a towel. Little secret: Albert Einstein listens to Celine Dion to focus. I repeat, Celine Dion. Second half! The crowd is on its feet, and so are the players.
Albert Einstein, this generational talent, air-balls in the third quarter! The crowd is stunned!
Albert Einstein, this swiss-army-knife type, shows negative body language! Hot head creeping in!
Bonnie Blue carries the weight of their bare hands and the basketball with equal grace!
Yao Ming misses in the clutch! A reverse layup off the mark in the first quarter!
Albert Einstein leaves the palace of hoops quietly! Quiet as an inventor after the status quo setback!
Bonnie Blue walks head down toward the tunnel. Angel Reese drags her feet behind, shoulders slumped. During the break, I tried to juggle three balls. My cameraman filmed everything. It'll come out someday. Until next time! Up next: 'Life Unplugged: A Day Without WiFi.' A shocking documentary.
Matchday 13 — vs Boston Ring-Chasers
114-86 (W)
Albert Einstein stretches center court! Loosening up, the inventor is getting ready!
Yao Ming lets fly the rock beautifully for a buzzer-beater! What touch!
Hulk forces the bad shot! Their lab notebook intimidation factor!
Yao Ming pulls up and creates! Another assist facing the rim! Quarterback!
This newcomer Bonnie Blue runs the pick-and-pop to perfection! Tactical mastery!
Off to the locker room. Yao Ming has already drained two water bottles. Did you know Yao Ming plays better when it's raining outside? Even indoors. Go figure. The show goes on. Players take position. Silence. Whistle.
Bonnie Blue treats the rock like the game and sinks it. Easy as pie for a tv host!
The announcer calls Albert Einstein 'The inventor!' the gym roars its approval!
This hungry young player Angel Reese unites the locker room! Natural-born leadership captain's mentality!
The stadium knows it! Hulk is special! This absolute legend writing legacy!
Albert Einstein, this smooth operator, salutes the faithful! A salute to the fans! What a night!
Yao Ming runs to the coach and lifts the coach up. Not thrilled but smiles anyway. I spent this game nervously chewing gum. I'm on my seventh piece. Good evening! Now: 'Destination Unknown: The Roundabout in Scranton, PA.' Total adventure.
Matchday 14 — vs San Antonio Skyscrapers
90-129 (L)
Bonnie Blue locks eyes with the opponent! The stare of a tv host who means business!
Bonnie Blue, this pint-sized baller, can't finish facing the rim! That one stings!
Bonnie Blue gets the ball stripped! The game would have stayed in a tv host's grip!
Bonnie Blue gets posterized! A tv host framed by their bare hands in the worst way!
Hulk slaps the floor in frustration! Slapping harder than a scientist hits the workbench!
Halftime whistle. Yao Ming spits into the trash can walking into the locker room. Word is Yao Ming sleeps with his basketball shoes on. I can't confirm it, but the source is reliable. We pick up right where we left off. Time to play.
Yao Ming misfires driving to the hoop! Even this world-class player has off nights!
Bonnie Blue rises up but can't sustain the effort! Lack of consistency emptying the tank!
This living legend Hulk with turnover number lengths ahead! Heavy feet is piling up!
Angel Reese slams the Wilson in frustration! Tendency to rush on full display!
Hulk, this franchise cornerstone, takes the loss hard. Defense that's basically a suggestion at the wrong moments.
Yao Ming is the last one off the court, shoulders hunched. Albert Einstein waits at the tunnel entrance. During the break, I tried doing crunches behind the console. My back remembers. Good evening! Now: 'Destination Unknown: The Roundabout in Scranton, PA.' Total adventure.
Matchday 15 — vs Oklahoma City Treasure-Chest
100-109 (L)
Bonnie Blue steps onto the arena! From competing the game to this, game time!
Bonnie Blue, this guy nobody was talking about, comes up empty! An alley-oop off target from the right corner!
Bonnie Blue throws it away! A pass worse than a tv host tossing the game!
Hulk gets blown by! Even a scientist couldn't stop that!
Hulk nails a half-court heave from deep! Range like their lab notebook reaching across the workshop!
The locker room. Hulk sprawls out full-length on the bench. Juicy anecdote: Hulk was caught dancing the Macarena in the showers. Alone. Both teams emerge from the tunnel. The second half can begin.
Hulk vents at their teammates! The scientist who vents about the hidden truth!
This guy nobody was talking about Bonnie Blue muscles up a two-handed slam but can't get it to fall!
Hulk makes the hockey assist! The unsung play of a scientist behind the hidden truth!
This All-Star caliber talent Yao Ming can't close out! The legs are shot on the low block!
Bonnie Blue vows to come back stronger! Stronger than their bare hands reinforced with the game!
Albert Einstein rips off his headband and throws it on the ground. Angel Reese picks up her own and folds it carefully. On my end, I discovered the arena's coffee machine was broken. The game nearly went uncommentated. Thanks everyone! And now: 'Keeping Up with the Kardashians: Season 312.' They will never stop.
aussie buccaneers ends the season #5 with a 11W-4L record. Season MVP: Yao Ming.
Season Journal
Holy shit, the arena is erupting and the game hasn't even started. There are 20,000 absolute maniacs on their feet chanting the name of a franchise with more scars than a retired boxer. Seasons of domination, seasons of total demolition, insane 3 AM trades, Draft picks that smelled like either genius or pure madness, nobody knew at the time, and honestly sometimes we still don't. But tonight, all of that is behind us. Tonight is the present, and the present reeks of adrenaline and revenge. Ladies and gentlemen... Aussie buccaneers!
Yeah sure, it's a team sport, we all agree on that. But when you've got Yao Ming on your roster, the word "team" basically means him plus four guys who pass him the ball. Standing at 229 cm, a first step more explosive than a rocket launch, and a fadeaway so silky that even the defenders applaud as they watch him score. Scouts had this dude flagged at 14. By 16, he was beating pros. Today? He's embarrassing them.
But what truly terrifies opponents isn't his highlights, it's his head. Look into his eyes during crunch time. There's nothing there. No stress, no doubt, just a killer's stare that says "give me the ball and get the hell out of the way." Opposing coaches have tried double-teams, triple-teams, zone defense, trash talk, Hack-a-Shaq... Nothing works. The man is programmed for clutch moments. It's genetic, and there's not a damn thing anyone can do about it.
Attention, things are about to get serious. Actually no, things are about to go completely off the rails. The front office signed Albert Einstein. The man is an inventor. Yes, you heard that right. An inventor. On a basketball court. With their prototype sketch in his gym bag and zero understanding of what a pick-and-roll is. The coach says it's a "bet on raw athleticism" but between us, I'm pretty sure he lost a poker bet. Albert Einstein had his first practice yesterday and asked if the free throw line was home plate. The teammates are dying laughing, the fans don't know whether to cry or applaud, and the GM was spotted updating his resume on LinkedIn.
The budget is like the guy who goes to a restaurant, looks at the menu, orders one entree and splits the dessert. It's not poverty, but it's not the high life either. They've got a decent roster, nobody's complaining, but nobody's saying "damn, what a squad" either. Solid without being spectacular. The kind of team that beats you on a Tuesday and you've forgotten about them by Wednesday morning. But underestimate them and they'll make you pay.
aussie buccaneers ends the season #5 with a 11W-4L record. Season MVP: Yao Ming.
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