My dream starting five — basketball_team 🇺🇸
5 members · TeamBranch
Season Journal
Standings
| # | Team | W | L | Pts |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | Detroit Engine-Roar | 14 | 1 | 28 |
| 2 | San Antonio Skyscrapers | 12 | 3 | 24 |
| 3 | New York Over-Timers | 12 | 3 | 24 |
| 4 | Cleveland Twin-Towers | 12 | 3 | 24 |
| 5 | Oklahoma City Treasure-Chest | 10 | 5 | 20 |
| 6 | Boston Ring-Chasers | 10 | 5 | 20 |
| 7 | Denver Horse-Track | 10 | 5 | 20 |
| 8 | Houston Blast-Off | 7 | 8 | 14 |
| 9 | Minnesota Ice-Wall | 7 | 8 | 14 |
| 10 | My Team | 6 | 9 | 12 |
| 11 | Phoenix No-Defense | 5 | 10 | 10 |
| 12 | Los Angeles Nursing-Home | 5 | 10 | 10 |
| 13 | Orlando Magic-Beans | 4 | 11 | 8 |
| 14 | Philadelphia Injury-Report | 3 | 12 | 6 |
| 15 | Toronto Border-Patrol | 2 | 13 | 4 |
| 16 | Miami Heart-Attack | 1 | 14 | 2 |
Pre-season
Stop. Everybody shut up. You feel that? That smell of freshly waxed hardwood, brand-new kicks, and electric tension hanging in the air? That's the smell of a night that's going down in the history books. We're in a building where every seat is taken, every eye is locked on the tunnel where a team that has thrilled generations is about to emerge. Championships, heartbreaks, legendary comebacks, midnight trades that shifted the entire balance of the league... This franchise is a damn novel all by itself. And tonight, we're starting the next chapter. The team with no name, baby! If you paid for your ticket tonight, there's one reason and one reason only, and that reason's name is Batman. The man is massive, marathon-runner cardio, and surgeon's hands. This man catches a ball mid-flight the way you grab the remote off the couch. Except he follows it up with a spin move, a step-back, and a 30-footer that doesn't even touch the rim. Nothing but net. Every single time. Like the basket is magnetized to the damn ball. His teammate told me something last week that gave me chills. He said: "When he's silent in the locker room before a game, I know we're about to destroy everybody." The man doesn't talk, he executes. He doesn't celebrate, he absorbs. And when the buzzer is approaching and the score is tight, everybody knows. The teammates, the opponents, the refs, the guy selling nachos on the upper deck. Everybody knows the ball is ending up in his hands. And it's ending up in the basket. And because this season couldn't possibly be normal, the coach went out and signed Albert Einstein. The man. Is. An inventor. I'm going to let that marinate for two seconds. An inventor. On a professional basketball court. With guys who jump 3 feet off the ground. This dude jumps 6 inches, on a good day, with a running start and the wind at his back. But he's got their prototype sketch and apparently, the technical motion of an inventor and a pull-up jumper are "basically the same thing, give or take 90 degrees." That's what the coach said. The team doctor immediately requested a cognitive evaluation for the coach. Let's talk money. We'll keep it short because there ain't any. The budget is so low that the equipment manager also does the accounting, the post-game spread is leftover Domino's on discount, and the last free agent who toured the facility ran for the hills. But damn it, these guys don't care. They play with the fury of men who have everything to prove and nothing to lose. This is the most dangerous team in the league, not because they're good, but because they don't give a single damn about losing.
Matchday 1 — vs Detroit Engine-Roar
83-128 (L)
This certified GOAT candidate Usain Bolt comes out firing! A catch-and-shoot triple in the first minute!
Bob Ross bricks it! Not the same accuracy as hosting the primetime show!
Albert Einstein explodes into a trap! Ego the size of Texas when reading the defense!
Batman overcommits! Going all-in like a superhero on the game, but wrong!
Albert Einstein picks up the second technical! This hall-of-fame lock ejected! Sometimes predictable game!
Well-deserved break. Albert Einstein looks like someone who just ran a marathon. Little secret: Albert Einstein has a secret TikTok account with 12 followers. Posts cooking tutorials. And we're off! The energy in the arena just went up a notch.
Air ball from Albert Einstein! Being an inventor doesn't help with shooting, apparently!
Batman short-arms the shot from fatigue! This potential GOAT has nothing left!
Stolen from Usain Bolt! An athlete who let it slip through their fingers!
Batman slaps the floor in frustration! Slapping harder than a superhero hits the workbench!
Usain Bolt leaves the field house with dignity! The dignity of an athlete with the starting blocks!
Albert Einstein sighs so loudly that the reporters hear it. Batman winces. Tonight I lost my voice, rediscovered my passion, and forgot where I parked. A complete evening. Thanks for tonight. And now: '60 Minutes: The Secrets of the Office Coffee Machine.'
Matchday 2 — vs Miami Heart-Attack
120-105 (W)
Barack Obama comes out hot! Heated up and ready, the community organizer means business!
Albert Einstein tallies another one! This inventor keeps racking them up!
Albert Einstein walls up in the high post! Immovable as their prototype sketch bolted down!
Albert Einstein dishes a beautiful pass! Special delivery from this inventor!
Batman sets the screen with precision worthy of their bare hands! Tactical genius!
The locker room. Barack Obama sprawls out full-length on the bench. Bus driver's confession: Barack Obama raps gibberish during road trips. Loudly. On to the next chapter. The court is just waiting for the ball.
The crowd erupts as Bob Ross nails a floater! A television host on fire at the venue!
Chants of 'television host! Television host!' fill the gymnasium for Bob Ross!
Batman, this hall-of-fame lock, communicates the switch! Iron discipline and vocal leadership!
The transformation of Usain Bolt is complete! This all-time great has arrived!
Bob Ross wraps up with a double-double! Double duty: their TV camera and the leather!
Barack Obama improvises an Oscar acceptance speech. Usain Bolt plays the imaginary violin. On my end, I discovered the arena's coffee machine was broken. The game nearly went uncommentated. We're packing up. Time for the late-night feature: 'Unsolved Mysteries: Where Is My Left Sock.'
Matchday 3 — vs Orlando Magic-Beans
91-103 (L)
This first-ballot legend Batman means business! Fast start at half court!
Barack Obama dunks the ball right into the defender's hands! Hot head!
Usain Bolt gets picked! An athlete getting the personal records stolen in broad daylight!
Barack Obama caught flat-footed! Standing still, the community organizer reflexes took a nap!
Bob Ross banks it in from the right corner! A television host's steady hand at work!
The players disappear into the tunnel. Barack Obama asks for an ice pack. Anecdote: Barack Obama slipped on a banana peel during practice. The videos leaked. The internet never forgets. Let's go. The arena rumbles, the players answer.
Batman, this solid build, throws the hands up! Exasperated along the baseline!
Barack Obama bobbles and misses! Fumbling the pill like it's a Monday morning!
Albert Einstein shifts the defense! Moving pieces like an inventor at work!
Bob Ross leans on their knees! Gassed, but the television host keeps going!
Albert Einstein sits on the bench post-game! Sitting like an inventor after their prototype sketch broke!
Batman sits on the floor in the hallway. Usain Bolt sits down next to him. Nobody speaks. Meanwhile, your favorite commentator spilled coffee on the mixing board. Twice. See you soon. In the meantime: 'Wipeout: IKEA on a Saturday.' Worse than the actual obstacles.
Matchday 4 — vs Philadelphia Injury-Report
103-100 (W)
Barack Obama stretches center court! Loosening up, the community organizer is getting ready!
Usain Bolt with the huge defensive stop driving to the hoop! This all-time great says no!
Batman sends it wide! Their bare hands wouldn't forgive that either!
Bob Ross converts the and-one! Tough as hosting the primetime show all day!
Usain Bolt exploits the soft spot in the center circle! Soft as the personal records under the starting blocks!
The players leave the court. Batman clings to the tunnel railing. Confession: Batman calls mom after every loss. And every win. And also on Tuesdays. The locker room empties, the court fills up. Act 2.
Batman scores under pressure! Pressure? Please, a superhero deals with worse every day!
Albert Einstein blocks from behind! Came outta nowhere like an inventor on a mission!
The venue erupts as Albert Einstein enters! The inventor gets a hero's welcome!
Batman, this certified GOAT candidate, with the cold-blooded off-balance shot at the buzzer!
Albert Einstein high-fives the crowd! Those inventor hands spreading joy!
Batman points both hands at the sky. Albert Einstein points at Batman. Bob Ross points at the exit. During the timeout, I tried to do pull-ups on the edge of the broadcast booth. Zero. And now, a brand new episode of 'Desperately Seeking My Cat.' Good night, everyone.
Matchday 5 — vs Phoenix No-Defense
101-104 (L)
Batman, this do-it-all player, announced to huge cheers! A Finals-like atmosphere!
Albert Einstein finishes with style! Years of revolutionizing the status quo built those hands!
Barack Obama can't contain the drive! Rallying the neighborhood is more containable!
Brick! Batman misfires from way beyond the arc! Defense that's basically a suggestion at the worst time!
Barack Obama converts in transition! Transitioning like a community organizer between the neighborhood tasks!
Halftime. Albert Einstein wolfs down an energy bar in two bites. Rumor has it Albert Einstein tried to recruit the pizza delivery guy for the team. The guy was 6'9". Back to business. The players bounce around to warm up.
Albert Einstein, this versatile guy, rattles out the free throw! Shaky emotions under pressure getting the best of this once-in-a-lifetime player!
Bob Ross takes off the towel! This name that's buzzing showing limited stamina!
A narrative for the ages: Bob Ross, the television host who mastered their TV camera and the pill!
This once-in-a-lifetime player Albert Einstein with the clutch-time breakdown! Injury-prone body on full display!
Barack Obama consoles teammates! The heart of a community organizer in that moment!
Usain Bolt stares at his hands like he doesn't recognize them. Albert Einstein exhales. Again. And again. I spent the evening standing up and sitting down every thirty seconds. My Fitbit is congratulating me. Thanks for being here. Coming up: 'Forbidden Zone: Behind the Scenes of a Vending Machine.'
Matchday 6 — vs Los Angeles Nursing-Home
121-104 (W)
Barack Obama, this absolute legend, wins the opening tip! Great start for the team!
Bob Ross fades away the ball with flair and hits a catch-and-shoot triple! Sensational!
Albert Einstein rotates beautifully! Spinning with precision worthy of their prototype sketch!
Bob Ross with the hockey assist! Setting up the play like a true television host!
Bob Ross controls the glass! Board work as precise as a day job with their TV camera!
Halftime whistle. Bob Ross high-fives his teammates on the way out. Did you know Bob Ross knits to unwind? Made a scarf in Los Angeles Nursing-Home's colors. By accident, obviously. The players step onto the hardwood once more. The second half starts now.
Bob Ross, this dude putting the league on notice, drops a two-handed slam from mid-range! Pure artistry!
This guy with rings on every finger Barack Obama brings a cathedral silence to a new level! Incredible scene!
Batman, this swiss-army-knife type, holds the team together with pure God-given talent! Captain!
The emotion is real as Batman the superhero delivers their best with their bare hands!
This undisputed superstar Usain Bolt wraps up a sensational performance! Victory is sweet!
Usain Bolt dumps his Gatorade on Barack Obama who screams because it was cold. Bob Ross piles on. I spent this game nervously chewing gum. I'm on my seventh piece. Good night! Up next: 'My 600-Lb Neighbor: He Makes Noise at 3 AM.' Shocking testimonies.
Matchday 7 — vs Toronto Border-Patrol
114-106 (W)
Tip-off! Usain Bolt gets us started! Let's go!
Usain Bolt makes it look easy! As easy as an athlete shatterring the personal records!
Batman, this versatile guy, blankets the shooter on the low block! No daylight!
This household name Albert Einstein leads the fast break and dishes! Easy bucket off the assist!
Batman, this smooth operator, exploits the mismatch from downtown! Smart play!
Well-deserved break. Batman looks like someone who just ran a marathon. Anecdote: Batman fell asleep on the bench during an exhibition game. Still got named MVP. We resume. Eyes locked in, jaws clenched.
Usain Bolt scores an and-one in a Finals-like atmosphere! The starting blocks vibes radiating across the gym!
This guy with rings on every finger Usain Bolt silences the hostile crowd! A sold-out gym on fire shifts!
Usain Bolt, this colossus, boxes out for the teammate! This generational talent doing the dirty work!
Every time Bob Ross touches the Wilson, you see the discipline of their TV camera!
Barack Obama with the game ball! Earned it the hard way, community organizer style!
Albert Einstein and Usain Bolt act out a movie scene where they reunite in slow motion. The crowd is dying. Meanwhile, your favorite commentator spilled coffee on the mixing board. Twice. Thanks for tonight. And now: '60 Minutes: The Secrets of the Office Coffee Machine.'
Matchday 8 — vs Minnesota Ice-Wall
103-113 (L)
Batman steps onto the temple of basketball! From competing the game to this, game time!
A pull-up jumper from Batman goes in and out! Heartbreaking in transition!
Usain Bolt throws it away! Ego the size of Texas under pressure in the paint!
Usain Bolt, this big fella, gets blown by on the perimeter! Sometimes predictable game in the legs!
Albert Einstein, this combo guard, elevates for a monster and-one!
Halftime whistle. Usain Bolt flops into the first available chair. Did you know? Usain Bolt has a personal mini-fridge in the locker room. Nobody knows what's inside. The players step onto the hardwood once more. The second half starts now.
Bob Ross stares in disbelief! The look of a television host who just lost everything!
A layup attempt by Albert Einstein falls short! Tendency to force bad shots in the legs!
Batman communicates the switch! Clear as a superhero's instructions!
Albert Einstein grabs the jersey for air! Needs more air than their prototype sketch in the workshop!
Barack Obama looks at the scoreboard one last time! Numbers don't lie for a community organizer!
Albert Einstein walks head down toward the tunnel. Batman drags his feet behind, shoulders slumped. Evening confession: I'm wearing Albert Einstein's jersey under my shirt. For morale. That's all for tonight! Coming up: 'CSI: Underground Parking Garage.' Riveting stuff.
Matchday 9 — vs Houston Blast-Off
106-90 (W)
Usain Bolt, this hall-of-fame lock, draws first blood! A double-clutch layup to start!
Usain Bolt, this long boy, takes over at half court. A finger roll! That's elite!
Bob Ross, this solid build, swats it into the third row! A rebound in traffic!
Albert Einstein generates another look! Creative vision worthy of an inventor!
Batman fires away to the weak side! This household name exploiting the rotation!
Time to breathe. Bob Ross has both hands on both knees, completely cooked. Small detail: Bob Ross wears mismatched socks every game. Calls it a strategy. The players jog toward the court. The air is electric.
Barack Obama powers through for a reverse layup! The brute force of rallying the neighborhood!
A standing ovation is electric when Albert Einstein has the ball! An inventor charging the room!
Albert Einstein rebounds and outlets! From board to bucket, this inventor does it all!
From their bullhorn shifts to this ball game on the arena,Barack Obama does it all!
Bob Ross daps up the opposition! Class act, on and off the court!
Albert Einstein pretends to faint from happiness. Bob Ross pretends to call 911. Final confession: I still don't know how to pronounce Albert Einstein's name. Forgive me. We're done! And now: 'The Voice: Office Karaoke After Two Beers Edition.'
Matchday 10 — vs Denver Horse-Track
112-113 (L)
This first-ballot legend Batman gets the crowd going early! The energy is building!
Bob Ross with another half-court heave! You can't stop this man!
Batman gets posted up and scored on! This undisputed superstar overpowered!
Barack Obama bricks another one! Building something awful with their bullhorn tonight!
Usain Bolt lets fly with renewed energy! This living legend smells blood!
Intermission. Albert Einstein dumps an entire water bottle over his head. Anecdote: Albert Einstein tried to impress the Denver Horse-Track players with a warm-up dunk. Hit the rim. With his face. The show goes on. Players take position. Silence. Whistle.
Batman misses the game-tying shot! Even a superhero couldn't save that one!
Batman slams the orange in frustration! Sometimes predictable game on full display!
The arc of this game bends toward Usain Bolt! This franchise cornerstone controlling destiny!
Batman misfires on the potential dagger! This undisputed superstar lets them off the hook!
Barack Obama, this undisputed superstar, will be back stronger. This defeat fuels the fire.
Batman presses his forehead against the tunnel glass. Usain Bolt walks right past without noticing. On my end, the AC in the booth broke down. I sweated more than Usain Bolt. We're out! And now, 'House Hunters: Broom Closet Edition.' Cozy open concept.
Matchday 11 — vs New York Over-Timers
88-104 (L)
This undisputed superstar Usain Bolt in the starting lineup! Let's see what this undisputed superstar brings!
Barack Obama misses! Even a community organizer can't fix that shot!
Sloppy handling by Batman! Competing the game is done with more finesse!
Usain Bolt gets crossed over! Ankles broken like the personal records on a rough day!
This basketball god Usain Bolt does it again! A free throw with effortless precision!
Back in the locker room, Barack Obama sits down and stares at the ceiling. Fun fact: Barack Obama was voted best-looking player on the team. By his mom. In a poll she created herself. Tipoff! The ref blows the whistle, the ball is in the air.
This certified GOAT candidate Batman can't believe the call! Arguing with the ref!
Albert Einstein blows past but the shot rims out! Heavy feet rears its ugly head!
Usain Bolt calls the audible! Adapting on the fly, that's athlete mentality!
This household name Albert Einstein calls for a sub! Can't go anymore! Heavy feet taking its toll!
Usain Bolt shakes hands through the pain! An athlete who respects the starting blocks and the game!
Barack Obama avoids the cameras like the plague. Batman gets caught. Just says 'we'll be better'. Fun fact: my driver has been waiting in the parking lot for an hour. He's sent me 14 messages. Off to bed! Or stay for 'Real Housewives of the DMV.' The line is around the block.
Matchday 12 — vs Cleveland Twin-Towers
98-117 (L)
This first-ballot legend Batman opens the scoring! A free throw! Early advantage!
Usain Bolt forces a thunderous slam in transition! This generational talent trying too hard!
This once-in-a-lifetime player Albert Einstein with turnover number buckets! Lack of consistency is piling up!
Bob Ross lunges the wrong direction! Fake had this seasoned vet fooled!
Barack Obama crosses over the rock with purpose! A step-back three! This franchise cornerstone means business!
Halftime. Barack Obama is holding his ribs walking toward the tunnel. Small detail: Barack Obama whistles the national anthem before every game. Off-key. Consistently off-key. We resume. Eyes locked in, jaws clenched.
This seasoned vet Bob Ross stares at the ref! That look could freeze water!
Usain Bolt can't convert! The athlete's touch with the personal records deserted them!
Albert Einstein goes to the post! That inventor strength is showing!
Usain Bolt grimaces through the effort! The grimace of an athlete finishing the personal records!
Barack Obama walks off in defeat! Even a community organizer's skills couldn't save tonight!
Batman claps his hands in frustration. Usain Bolt clenches his jaw so hard you can hear it from here. I spent this entire evening standing because my chair has been broken for three games. Nobody fixes it. Thanks for watching this game. And now: 'Deal or No Deal: Office Fridge Edition.'
Matchday 13 — vs Boston Ring-Chasers
114-110 (W)
Game time! Barack Obama and this franchise cornerstone ready to put on a show at the temple of basketball!
Albert Einstein blocks the layup attempt! A flawless defensive rotation with their prototype sketch authority!
Batman gets the friendly rim but no luck! Even the superhero touch can't save that one!
Batman catches and shoots,a thunderous slam! Quick hands from competing the game!
Usain Bolt counters the press! Problem solved, athlete style!
Back in the locker room, Barack Obama sits down and stares at the ceiling. Confession: Barack Obama believes the away locker room is haunted. Refuses to go in alone. Here they come. You can read the determination on their faces.
Barack Obama dishes and drills it! On the decisive possession! Silky smooth technique under pressure!
This player on the come-up Bob Ross reads the play and intercepts! Brilliant anticipation!
Barack Obama in a roaring arena! This all-time great has been waiting for this stage!
Barack Obama takes over in the fourth quarter! Dominating like a community organizer who owns the room!
Bob Ross shares the credit! Team player on and off the court!
Batman points both hands at the sky. Usain Bolt points at Batman. Barack Obama points at the exit. Tonight I nearly had a heart attack at least four times. And I'm just the commentator. Thanks for tonight. And now: '60 Minutes: The Secrets of the Office Coffee Machine.'
Matchday 14 — vs San Antonio Skyscrapers
86-131 (L)
Batman gets the crowd going early! Setting the tone like a superhero on day one!
Usain Bolt shoots an air ball in a Finals-like atmosphere! An athlete lost in the noise!
This absolute legend Batman commits the 5-second violation! Clock management tendency to rush!
Albert Einstein beaten off the dribble! Quicker than the status quo slipping from an inventor!
Barack Obama, this smooth operator, sits down hard on the bench! Hot head written all over his face!
Into the tunnel. Bob Ross grabs a banana on the way and devours it. Locker room intel: Bob Ross has a tattoo of a basketball hoop on his butt. That's commitment. Alright, it's time. The second half waits for no one.
Albert Einstein misses the triple! Three-pointers aren't like triple-checking the status quo!
Albert Einstein is out on their feet! Running on fumes and pure inventor stubbornness!
Barack Obama dispossessed! Couldn't hold on, not the community organizer's finest moment!
Usain Bolt, this franchise cornerstone, with the frustrated foul! Defense that's basically a suggestion in tough moments!
Bob Ross vows to come back stronger! Stronger than their TV camera reinforced with the primetime show!
Batman avoids the cameras like the plague. Usain Bolt gets caught. Just says 'we'll be better'. Your commentator broke his personal screaming record tonight. My throat is not thanking me. See you soon. And now: '911: My Cat Climbed on Top of the Wardrobe.'
Matchday 15 — vs Oklahoma City Treasure-Chest
101-108 (L)
Barack Obama gets the starting nod! A community organizer starting with their bullhorn confidence!
Usain Bolt heaves and misses! Should have heaved the personal records instead!
Batman, this swiss-army-knife type, fumbles the entry pass from mid-range!
Bob Ross gets posterized! A television host framed by their TV camera in the worst way!
Albert Einstein scores the go-ahead! An inventor who always finishes the job on time!
Cut! Halftime. Usain Bolt's jersey is completely drenched in sweat. Intel: Usain Bolt once called an imaginary timeout in the middle of a game. The ref actually hesitated. Resetting the counters for this second half. Well, not really.
Barack Obama kicks the air! The frustration of a community organizer who knows they can do better!
Barack Obama short on the attempt! Needs the reach of their bullhorn!
This household name Albert Einstein calls the audible! Changed the play and it works!
Usain Bolt drags their feet! Heavy as the starting blocks at the end of a shift!
Albert Einstein leaves the temple of basketball quietly! Quiet as an inventor after the status quo setback!
Batman sighs so loudly that the reporters hear it. Usain Bolt winces. Yours truly held it together all evening without a bathroom break. That's professionalism. That's it for tonight. Coming up: 'Nailed It: Cakes Ruined by My Mother-in-Law.'
My Team ends the season #10 with a 6W-9L record. Season MVP: Batman.
Season Journal
Stop. Everybody shut up. You feel that? That smell of freshly waxed hardwood, brand-new kicks, and electric tension hanging in the air? That's the smell of a night that's going down in the history books. We're in a building where every seat is taken, every eye is locked on the tunnel where a team that has thrilled generations is about to emerge. Championships, heartbreaks, legendary comebacks, midnight trades that shifted the entire balance of the league... This franchise is a damn novel all by itself. And tonight, we're starting the next chapter. The team with no name, baby!
If you paid for your ticket tonight, there's one reason and one reason only, and that reason's name is Batman. The man is massive, marathon-runner cardio, and surgeon's hands. This man catches a ball mid-flight the way you grab the remote off the couch. Except he follows it up with a spin move, a step-back, and a 30-footer that doesn't even touch the rim. Nothing but net. Every single time. Like the basket is magnetized to the damn ball.
His teammate told me something last week that gave me chills. He said: "When he's silent in the locker room before a game, I know we're about to destroy everybody." The man doesn't talk, he executes. He doesn't celebrate, he absorbs. And when the buzzer is approaching and the score is tight, everybody knows. The teammates, the opponents, the refs, the guy selling nachos on the upper deck. Everybody knows the ball is ending up in his hands. And it's ending up in the basket.
And because this season couldn't possibly be normal, the coach went out and signed Albert Einstein. The man. Is. An inventor. I'm going to let that marinate for two seconds. An inventor. On a professional basketball court. With guys who jump 3 feet off the ground. This dude jumps 6 inches, on a good day, with a running start and the wind at his back. But he's got their prototype sketch and apparently, the technical motion of an inventor and a pull-up jumper are "basically the same thing, give or take 90 degrees." That's what the coach said. The team doctor immediately requested a cognitive evaluation for the coach.
Let's talk money. We'll keep it short because there ain't any. The budget is so low that the equipment manager also does the accounting, the post-game spread is leftover Domino's on discount, and the last free agent who toured the facility ran for the hills. But damn it, these guys don't care. They play with the fury of men who have everything to prove and nothing to lose. This is the most dangerous team in the league, not because they're good, but because they don't give a single damn about losing.
My Team ends the season #10 with a 6W-9L record. Season MVP: Batman.
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