HI — basketball_team 🇺🇸
5 members · TeamBranch
Season Journal
Standings
| # | Team | W | L | Pts |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | Detroit Engine-Roar | 14 | 1 | 28 |
| 2 | Oklahoma City Treasure-Chest | 12 | 3 | 24 |
| 3 | Boston Ring-Chasers | 12 | 3 | 24 |
| 4 | HI | 10 | 5 | 20 |
| 5 | Cleveland Twin-Towers | 10 | 5 | 20 |
| 6 | San Antonio Skyscrapers | 10 | 5 | 20 |
| 7 | Denver Horse-Track | 9 | 6 | 18 |
| 8 | New York Over-Timers | 8 | 7 | 16 |
| 9 | Toronto Border-Patrol | 7 | 8 | 14 |
| 10 | Los Angeles Nursing-Home | 7 | 8 | 14 |
| 11 | Houston Blast-Off | 6 | 9 | 12 |
| 12 | Minnesota Ice-Wall | 4 | 11 | 8 |
| 13 | Philadelphia Injury-Report | 4 | 11 | 8 |
| 14 | Miami Heart-Attack | 3 | 12 | 6 |
| 15 | Phoenix No-Defense | 2 | 13 | 4 |
| 16 | Orlando Magic-Beans | 2 | 13 | 4 |
Pre-season
Ladies and gentlemen, good evening and welcome to what is probably going to be the most electric night of this season. The arena is packed to the rafters, there are people standing in the corridors, security gave up trying to control anything, and the DJ is blasting so loud the scoreboard is vibrating. We are here to talk about a legendary franchise. A team that has seen sacred monsters pass through, that has lived through dream seasons and nightmare years, that has rebuilt ten times over and always comes back with the same devouring hunger. Ladies and gentlemen... HI! Now let's talk about the man who moves jerseys faster than hot dogs at the concession stand. Wally West. Just the name sends chills through the building. The man is massive, arms that cover half the court, and a basketball IQ so fast that defenders feel like they're playing in slow motion. This man doesn't walk, he glides. He doesn't jump, he launches into orbit. And when he locks eyes with you before a free throw, you feel like YOU'RE the one about to catch the ball in your face. The worst part? His ice-cold composure. The clock shows 0.8 seconds, the whole building is holding its breath, the ball is burning in his hands... And he flashes a little smirk before draining the game-winner with sickening ease. He's the engine, the brain, and the heartbeat of that locker room. If he sneezes, the whole damn franchise catches a cold. Tonight, he's on a mission, and believe me, he didn't show up to mess around. Moment of truth, folks. You see the guy at the end of the bench, the one who looks completely lost among the giants? That's Wally West. A superhero in civilian life. The kind of guy who handles bare hands better than a basketball, and who somehow ended up on a professional roster because the coach "had a vision." A vision, ladies and gentlemen. Probably somewhere between his second and third mojito at the All-Star Weekend party. Wally West has a unique playing style: he runs a lot, understands very little, and has an unfortunate tendency to treat the game and the basketball exact same way. The fans already love him. Not for his stats (he has none) but because every time he steps on the court, it's Christmas morning. Budget-wise, we're in the "checked the couch cushions to fund the last contract" category. Seriously, there are high school programs with better catering. The owner watches every dollar like it's his last, and the GM negotiates trades with the anxiety of a guy haggling at a flea market. But paradoxically, that might be their strength: when you've got nothing to lose, you play free. And sometimes, freedom works miracles on the hardwood.
Matchday 1 — vs Detroit Engine-Roar
92-116 (L)
Quicksilver steps onto the palace of hoops! From competing the game to this, game time!
Barry Allen misses the bunny! A superhero dropping the game from point-blank!
Wally West, this do-it-all player, commits the travel! Lack of consistency in the footwork!
Quicksilver gets crossed over! Ankles broken like the game on a rough day!
Barry Allen penetrates the orange with flair and hits a buzzer beater! Sensational!
Break. Superman asks the medical staff for coffee. Request denied. Did you know? Superman once signed an autograph for a referee. During the game. Mid free-throw. Both teams emerge from the tunnel. The second half can begin.
Quicksilver slaps the floor in frustration! Slapping harder than a superhero hits the workbench!
Wally West fires and misses at half court. Should have stuck with the game!
Quicksilver goes small-ball! Adapting like a superhero who reads the room!
Barry Allen is running on fumes! The superhero tank is completely empty!
This legit talent Barry Allen shakes hands and moves on. In the end, ego the size of Texas proved costly.
Barry Allen rips off his headband and throws it on the ground. Wally West picks up his own and folds it carefully. While you were watching the game, I was desperately searching for my pen. Still haven't found it. See you at the next game! In the meantime: 'Pawn Stars: Selling a Pen Without a Cap.'
Matchday 2 — vs Miami Heart-Attack
131-92 (W)
Barry Allen checks in for the first play! Clocking in for the shift, let's work!
Quicksilver turns the corner into a workshop. A hook shot crafted with their bare hands!
Barry Allen, this hooper's hooper, sets the table facing the rim! Assist master!
Quicksilver hits at the last second! Clutch like a superhero meeting a deadline!
This hooper's hooper Barry Allen disrupts the play with a timely monster swat!
Halftime. The doctor examines Wally West's shoulder while the others catch their breath. Did you know Wally West started basketball because he was terrible at soccer? Sometimes failure leads to greatness. The players emerge from the tunnel. Stern faces, clenched fists.
Wally West drops an off-balance shot! The accuracy of a superhero on full display!
Barry Allen empties the bench! Everyone gets a shift, the superhero way!
Superman just tried to use their bare hands on the orange! Wrong equipment, right energy!
Barry Allen celebrates with a slide across the hardwood! Mimicking competing the game on the court!
Barry Allen is named player of the game! The superhero is also the star!
Wally West hits a dab in 2026. Barry Allen does an ironic dab. Quicksilver has no idea what that is. My evening? I spent it holding back tears. Of joy? Of exhaustion? Both. Good evening! Coming up: 'Dancing with the Stars: My Cousin's Wedding Edition.' Open bar.
Matchday 3 — vs Orlando Magic-Beans
115-83 (W)
Opening possession for Barry Allen! First touch, like first touch of their bare hands!
Barry Allen hits a reverse layup! Insane court vision proving to be the difference tonight!
Wally West, this all-around player, finds the rolling big man! A reverse layup off the assist!
Barry Allen, this all-around player, uses every inch to deliver an off-balance shot!
Wally West with the chase-down defensive stop! What athleticism!
Back in the locker room, Barry Allen sits down and stares at the ceiling. Fun fact: Barry Allen blocked a shot in the finals... And dislocated a thumb celebrating. Classic. And we're off! The energy in the arena just went up a notch.
Wally West handles the leather like their bare hands. A layup from the right corner! The precision of a superhero!
This absolute legend Superman and the team deliver a masterpiece! A tear drop! Perfection!
Quicksilver claims their superhero training helps with the ball handling! Maybe true?
This solid pro Barry Allen holds the follow-through! A primal scream after a reverse layup!
Quicksilver, this next-level player, soaks in the moment! Victory driving to the hoop! A slide across the hardwood!
Wally West cries tears of joy in Barry Allen's arms. Superman is also crying but nobody knows why. During the game, I counted how many times I said 'incredible.' Seventeen. A personal record. That was beautiful. And now: 'House Hunters International: 90-Square-Foot Studio, Wall View.' A steal.
Matchday 4 — vs Philadelphia Injury-Report
116-80 (W)
Wally West, this surprise package, embraces the Playoff atmosphere! Game on!
Barry Allen with the highlight-reel floater! This well-respected player owning the moment!
This player making noise Barry Allen with the behind-the-back dish! Highlight-reel pass!
This raw talent Wally West with a cold-blooded step-back three! No conscience!
Quicksilver a double team with authority! This tweener protecting the paint!
The players head to the locker room. Superman is sweating like a racehorse. Quick anecdote about Superman: apparently he eats pasta with ketchup before every game. To each their own ritual. We're back! The DJ cranks the volume, the players charge onto the court.
Wally West treats the leather like the game and sinks it. Easy as pie for a superhero!
Wally West with a showtime finger roll! This newcomer enjoying every second!
Barry Allen keeps saying 'just like competing the game' after every play!
Quicksilver gestures with invisible their bare hands! The signature superhero celebration!
Quicksilver carries the team to victory! Strong as a superhero on a Monday morning!
Barry Allen grabs the PA announcer's mic and shouts Quicksilver's name. The announcer chases him. I spent this entire evening standing because my chair has been broken for three games. Nobody fixes it. Good evening! Now: 'Destination Unknown: The Roundabout in Scranton, PA.' Total adventure.
Matchday 5 — vs Phoenix No-Defense
110-90 (W)
Barry Allen begins their shift on the court! A superhero starting the their bare hands shift!
Superman powers through for a buzzer beater! The brute force of competing the game!
Wally West with the rejection! Get that out of here! Superhero says no!
This player making noise Barry Allen orchestrates the offense driving to the hoop! Maestro!
This guy nobody was talking about Wally West calls the audible! Changed the play and it works!
The locker room fills up. Superman has already eaten three oranges. Juicy anecdote: Superman was caught dancing the Macarena in the showers. Alone. Resumption imminent. The players wrap up their express warm-up.
Superman with the step-back half-court heave! Creating space like a superhero with their bare hands!
What a hostile crowd! Barry Allen and the fans creating a spectacle!
Wally West adjusts on the fly! Quick thinking from this superhero!
Barry Allen proves that competing the game builds character for the temple of basketball!
Wally West soaks it in! Soaking up the moment, a superhero savoring glory!
Quicksilver and Barry Allen carry Barry Allen like a trophy across the entire court. During the game, I counted how many times I said 'incredible.' Seventeen. A personal record. We're packing up. Time for the late-night feature: 'Unsolved Mysteries: Where Is My Left Sock.'
Matchday 6 — vs Los Angeles Nursing-Home
121-83 (W)
This unknown gem Wally West in the starting lineup! Let's see what this unknown gem brings!
Wally West pulls up and drills a double-clutch layup! Can't teach that!
Superman finds the open teammate! Vision of a superhero spotting the game!
Wally West applies the same technique to the damn ball as to the game. A layup in transition!
Quicksilver denies the entry pass! No the game gets past this superhero!
Halftime. Barry Allen's hair is completely soaked, like climbing out of a pool. They say Barry Allen has a ritual where he touches the basket post three times. If someone watches, starts over. We're back! The coach drew stuff on the whiteboard, let's see if it works.
Superman, this all-time great, with the exclamation-point and-one! Game changer!
Wally West lets fly and it's too easy! The lead is ballooning! Mercy rule!
Superman offered the ref some the game advice! That's not how this works!
Quicksilver, this solid pro, with the primal scream! A slide across the hardwood! Raw emotion!
Superman wraps up with a double-double! Double duty: their bare hands and the Spalding!
Superman hits a dab in 2026. Wally West does an ironic dab. Barry Allen has no idea what that is. During the break, I tried doing crunches behind the console. My back remembers. Alright, good evening! Now it's 'Love Is in the Parking Lot.' Romance guaranteed.
Matchday 7 — vs Toronto Border-Patrol
130-84 (W)
Quicksilver huddles with the team! Huddling up, the superhero strategizes!
Barry Allen launches the Spalding into a floater! Iron discipline shining through!
Superman serves it on a platter! A superhero serving the game with style!
Superman knocks down a bucket at the buzzer! Ice in the veins!
Superman channels all their superhero intensity into a brilliant anticipation!
The players file out. Superman exchanges a tense look with the coach. Did you know Superman knits to unwind? Made a scarf in Toronto Border-Patrol's colors. By accident, obviously. The locker room empties, the court fills up. Act 2.
Barry Allen with the fadeaway buzzer-beater! Smooth as their bare hands in action!
Barry Allen dominates wire to wire! Dominant as a superhero over the game!
Quicksilver calls plays using superhero code words! The game means pick and roll!
Barry Allen salutes the bench! A superhero's salute to the their bare hands crew!
This player making noise Quicksilver walks off to a standing ovation! A Playoff atmosphere! Incredible!
Wally West and Superman play rock-paper-scissors to decide who carries the ball. Wally West loses. As for me, I powered through three coffees and a gas station sandwich. The glamorous life of sports journalism. Good night! Up next: 'My 600-Lb Neighbor: He Makes Noise at 3 AM.' Shocking testimonies.
Matchday 8 — vs Minnesota Ice-Wall
122-100 (W)
Superman locks eyes with the opponent! The stare of a superhero who means business!
This next-level player Barry Allen with a beautiful alley-oop at half court! Poetry in motion!
Quicksilver a perfect contest at the critical moment! Silky smooth technique right on cue!
Wally West with the bounce pass! The Wilson bouncing with precision worthy of their bare hands!
Barry Allen traps with the double! Trapping them, the superhero knows how to corner prey!
Back to the locker room. Wally West punches his locker. Anecdote: Wally West lost a bet and had to wear the center's shoes during warm-ups. Size 16. We're off again! The crowd chants the team's name.
Quicksilver hits nothing but net! Pure as a superhero's work with their bare hands!
This surprise package Wally West turns the hostile crowd into stunned silence!
This player making noise Barry Allen dives for the loose ball! That dawg mentality on every play!
Barry Allen's journey from the game to a buzzer beater inspires a standing ovation!
Quicksilver embraces teammates! The bond of competing the game together!
Quicksilver pretends to faint from happiness. Barry Allen pretends to call 911. Tonight I lost my voice, rediscovered my passion, and forgot where I parked. A complete evening. That's a wrap! Coming up: 'What Would You Do: People Who Say Hello in the Elevator.' Exposing the truth.
Matchday 9 — vs Houston Blast-Off
106-89 (W)
The floor welcomes Barry Allen! The superhero with the game has arrived!
Barry Allen nails an alley-oop from deep! Range like their bare hands reaching across the workshop!
Quicksilver takes the charge! Tough as nails, that's a superhero who doesn't back down!
Barry Allen with the transition assist! This hooper's hooper pushing the pace with an off-the-charts basketball IQ!
Barry Allen exploits the mismatch! Finding weakness with their bare hands acumen!
Intermission. Barry Allen dumps an entire water bottle over his head. Little scoop: Barry Allen logs every game in a notebook. With stars and smiley faces. At that age. The buzzer calls the players. Time for the show, act II.
This league veteran Barry Allen finishes with authority! A half-court heave on the low block!
The crowd waves their bare hands replicas! Superman has started a movement!
Wally West steps back the Spalding into the right hands! This total unknown quarterback!
Superman, this household name, has been building to this all game! On a strategic timeout!
Barry Allen finishes with a monster stat line! Numbers a superhero would be proud of!
Superman launches his shoe into the air. Barry Allen catches it. Standing ovation. On my end, I discovered the arena's coffee machine was broken. The game nearly went uncommentated. We're signing off. And now: 'Musical Chairs: Subway Seat Edition.' Winner takes all.
Matchday 10 — vs Denver Horse-Track
108-84 (W)
Barry Allen looks dialed in from the start! Unreal swagger preparation showing!
Wally West racks up a floater! Productive night for this superhero!
Superman, this solid build, clamps down in the clutch! Elite a surgical steal!
Barry Allen floats a perfect pass! Floating it with a superhero's soft touch!
Wally West communicates the switch! Clear as a superhero's instructions!
Halftime. The physio pounces on Barry Allen to massage his thighs. Locker room anecdote: Barry Allen talks to a sock called 'Assistant Coach.' We don't judge. We're back! The players look fired up.
Wally West, this tweener, uses strength and skill for an and-one! Complete player!
Quicksilver dribbles and the crowd chants the name! Listen to that noise!
Barry Allen provides the spark! Electric energy, the superhero is firing on all cylinders!
Wally West's got those superhero hands! Gripping the orange like it owes them money!
Quicksilver punches the air at game's end! Victory! The superhero did it!
Superman and Barry Allen cradle the game ball like a baby. Wally West takes a photo. I spent the evening looking for a stat that couldn't be found. It didn't exist. I made one up. That's a wrap! Coming up: 'What Would You Do: People Who Say Hello in the Elevator.' Exposing the truth.
Matchday 11 — vs New York Over-Timers
113-110 (W)
Wally West announces themselves! The superhero has arrived and the building knows it!
This next-level player Barry Allen holds ground at the buzzer! Immovable object!
Barry Allen misfires from the right corner! Their bare hands calibration needed!
Wally West hooks it in! The arc of a superhero swinging their bare hands!
Wally West blows past to the weak side! This hidden prospect exploiting the rotation!
Break time. Barry Allen bolts to the locker room without looking at anyone. Juicy anecdote: Barry Allen was caught dancing the Macarena in the showers. Alone. Break's over, the players take their positions.
Quicksilver with the putback at the horn! Second effort of a superhero with the game!
Quicksilver times it perfectly and rejects the shot! A rebound in traffic in transition!
You can feel an electric crowd through the screen! Barry Allen in the spotlight!
Barry Allen, this name that's buzzing, rises to the occasion! A reverse layup under the basket! Huge!
Barry Allen heads to the locker room with a smile! Good day at the office for the superhero!
Wally West grabs the PA announcer's mic and shouts Barry Allen's name. The announcer chases him. Final confession: I still don't know how to pronounce Wally West's name. Forgive me. Good evening! Up next: 'Fixer Upper: Renovating a Studio on a Twelve-Dollar Budget.' Challenge accepted.
Matchday 12 — vs Cleveland Twin-Towers
110-111 (L)
Tip-off! Barry Allen gets us started! Let's go!
Barry Allen, this solid build, elevates for a monster tear drop!
Quicksilver, this swiss-army-knife type, lets the shooter get free from downtown! Costly lapse!
Wally West misfires facing the rim! Even this guy nobody was talking about has off nights!
Barry Allen hits another! This dude putting the league on notice on a personal run under the basket!
End of the first half. Barry Allen is beet red but still standing. Rumor has it Barry Allen tried to recruit the pizza delivery guy for the team. The guy was 6'9". Break's over, time for basketball. Let's go.
Barry Allen gets stripped on the inbound pass! That's gonna be a costly turnover!
Wally West shakes their head! A superhero who can't believe that just happened!
Barry Allen, this smooth operator, embodies the spirit of competition! What a show!
This player on the come-up Quicksilver with the clutch-time breakdown! Limited stamina on full display!
Superman posts up past the media. This hall-of-fame lock not in the mood to talk.
Quicksilver and Barry Allen walk side by side without looking at each other. The silence is deafening. During the game, my colleague ordered sushi. It arrived at the final buzzer. Perfect timing. Good night everyone! Up next: 'Worst Cooks in America: Boiling an Egg Without Breaking It.' Challenge accepted.
Matchday 13 — vs Boston Ring-Chasers
102-119 (L)
Barry Allen starts in the small forward! Playing the small forward the way a superhero plays with their bare hands!
A sky hook from Barry Allen hits the iron! Ego the size of Texas under the spotlight!
Barry Allen, this tweener, gets called for the carry! Shaky emotions under pressure in ball-handling!
Barry Allen, this do-it-all player, can't keep up with the speed! Ego the size of Texas exposed!
A layup by Wally West! The crowd erupts! Pure God-given talent personified!
Halftime. Wally West glances at his phone for two seconds and puts it back. The staff told me Wally West sings in the shower. Badly. Very badly. Play resumes! The coach set a few things straight in the locker room.
Barry Allen mouths off on the decisive possession! A superhero venting about the game!
Barry Allen shoots an air ball in a packed arena! A superhero lost in the noise!
Wally West uses a relentless run and gun to get open! Open space created with their bare hands smarts!
Superman is gassed! More tired than after a full day of competing the game!
Superman walks off in defeat! Even a superhero's skills couldn't save tonight!
Barry Allen lets out a nervous laugh that sends chills down your spine. Quicksilver decides not to comment. Final confession: I still don't know how to pronounce Barry Allen's name. Forgive me. See you at the next game! In the meantime: 'Pawn Stars: Selling a Pen Without a Cap.'
Matchday 14 — vs San Antonio Skyscrapers
95-101 (L)
Superman wins the opening tip! Tipping off with superhero energy!
Superman misfires! The superhero's precision with the game is nowhere to be found!
Barry Allen loses possession! The game never leaves a superhero's hands like that!
Quicksilver left in the dust! Even a superhero moves faster than that!
Superman pulls off a scoop layup out of nowhere! Was that basketball or superhero magic? Unbelievable!
That's a cut. Wally West stumbles slightly reaching the locker room. Fun fact: Wally West was voted best-looking player on the team. By his mom. In a poll she created herself. The players are back. Some look fresh, others... Not so much.
Barry Allen storms to the bench! Heated! This superhero doesn't handle losing well!
Superman gets the friendly rim but no luck! Even the superhero touch can't save that one!
Superman uses a quick ball-movement offense brilliantly! Strategy from competing the game!
This guy with rings on every finger Superman can't close out! The legs are shot facing the rim!
Wally West shakes hands through the pain! A superhero who respects their bare hands and the game!
Wally West has bags under his eyes that weren't there before the game. Barry Allen has aged ten years in forty minutes. I spent the evening looking for a stat that couldn't be found. It didn't exist. I made one up. Thanks everyone! Up next: 'Ice Road Truckers: Uber Eats Delivery on a Rainy Night.'
Matchday 15 — vs Oklahoma City Treasure-Chest
103-106 (L)
This hungry young player Wally West comes out aggressive! Opens with a two-handed slam at half court!
Wally West dishes past everyone for a thunderous slam! This all-around player on a mission!
Wally West gets screened out! Stuck behind their bare hands like it's a wall!
Barry Allen denied by the basket! Even a superhero can't pry it open!
Barry Allen forces the critical turnover! Whipping this game into shape, superhero style!
Break. Superman's socks are soaking wet — quick change on the spot. Little secret: Superman watches cat videos between quarters. Says it's relaxing. Back on the hardwood. The tension has gone up a notch.
Barry Allen can't handle the pressure! This player making noise folds in right from the tip-off!
Barry Allen throws their hands up! Like a superhero when their bare hands breaks!
Superman, this all-time great, delivers a sequence that will go viral! Wisdom and poise!
Quicksilver dribbles into trouble! Lost out there like a superhero on the wrong floor!
Quicksilver gave it everything! Everything a superhero has, left on the court!
Wally West shakes Barry Allen's hand in silence. Not a word. Just a look that says it all. I learned backstage that Barry Allen also does superhero on weekends. That explains those reflexes. See you tomorrow. In the meantime, it's 'Who Wants to Marry My Goldfish.' Good luck with that.
HI ends the season #4 with a 10W-5L record. Season MVP: Wally West.
Season Journal
Ladies and gentlemen, good evening and welcome to what is probably going to be the most electric night of this season. The arena is packed to the rafters, there are people standing in the corridors, security gave up trying to control anything, and the DJ is blasting so loud the scoreboard is vibrating. We are here to talk about a legendary franchise. A team that has seen sacred monsters pass through, that has lived through dream seasons and nightmare years, that has rebuilt ten times over and always comes back with the same devouring hunger. Ladies and gentlemen... HI!
Now let's talk about the man who moves jerseys faster than hot dogs at the concession stand. Wally West. Just the name sends chills through the building. The man is massive, arms that cover half the court, and a basketball IQ so fast that defenders feel like they're playing in slow motion. This man doesn't walk, he glides. He doesn't jump, he launches into orbit. And when he locks eyes with you before a free throw, you feel like YOU'RE the one about to catch the ball in your face.
The worst part? His ice-cold composure. The clock shows 0.8 seconds, the whole building is holding its breath, the ball is burning in his hands... And he flashes a little smirk before draining the game-winner with sickening ease. He's the engine, the brain, and the heartbeat of that locker room. If he sneezes, the whole damn franchise catches a cold. Tonight, he's on a mission, and believe me, he didn't show up to mess around.
Moment of truth, folks. You see the guy at the end of the bench, the one who looks completely lost among the giants? That's Wally West. A superhero in civilian life. The kind of guy who handles bare hands better than a basketball, and who somehow ended up on a professional roster because the coach "had a vision." A vision, ladies and gentlemen. Probably somewhere between his second and third mojito at the All-Star Weekend party. Wally West has a unique playing style: he runs a lot, understands very little, and has an unfortunate tendency to treat the game and the basketball exact same way. The fans already love him. Not for his stats (he has none) but because every time he steps on the court, it's Christmas morning.
Budget-wise, we're in the "checked the couch cushions to fund the last contract" category. Seriously, there are high school programs with better catering. The owner watches every dollar like it's his last, and the GM negotiates trades with the anxiety of a guy haggling at a flea market. But paradoxically, that might be their strength: when you've got nothing to lose, you play free. And sometimes, freedom works miracles on the hardwood.
HI ends the season #4 with a 10W-5L record. Season MVP: Wally West.
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