My dream starting five — basketball_team 🇳🇿
5 members · TeamBranch
Season Journal
Standings
| # | Team | W | L | Pts |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | Detroit Engine-Roar | 15 | 0 | 30 |
| 2 | San Antonio Skyscrapers | 12 | 3 | 24 |
| 3 | Oklahoma City Treasure-Chest | 12 | 3 | 24 |
| 4 | Boston Ring-Chasers | 11 | 4 | 22 |
| 5 | New York Over-Timers | 11 | 4 | 22 |
| 6 | Cleveland Twin-Towers | 9 | 6 | 18 |
| 7 | My Team | 9 | 6 | 18 |
| 8 | Houston Blast-Off | 8 | 7 | 16 |
| 9 | Denver Horse-Track | 6 | 9 | 12 |
| 10 | Toronto Border-Patrol | 5 | 10 | 10 |
| 11 | Phoenix No-Defense | 5 | 10 | 10 |
| 12 | Orlando Magic-Beans | 5 | 10 | 10 |
| 13 | Los Angeles Nursing-Home | 4 | 11 | 8 |
| 14 | Philadelphia Injury-Report | 4 | 11 | 8 |
| 15 | Minnesota Ice-Wall | 3 | 12 | 6 |
| 16 | Miami Heart-Attack | 1 | 14 | 2 |
Pre-season
Get comfortable because tonight, we are about to witness something special. I can feel it. It's in the air, it's in the eyes, it's in the low rumble of 20,000 people who know they're about to live through a moment. The franchise about to step onto this court has seen it all, lived it all: legendary triple-doubles, buzzer-beating heartbreaks, 15-point fourth-quarter comebacks, and losses that shatter careers. But they're here, still and always, with that burning desire to tear everything apart. The team with no name, baby! Yeah sure, it's a team sport, we all agree on that. But when you've got Stephen Curry on your roster, the word "team" basically means him plus four guys who pass him the ball. Standing at 188 cm, a first step more explosive than a rocket launch, and a fadeaway so silky that even the defenders applaud as they watch him score. Scouts had this dude flagged at 14. By 16, he was beating pros. Today? He's embarrassing them. But what truly terrifies opponents isn't his highlights, it's his head. Look into his eyes during crunch time. There's nothing there. No stress, no doubt, just a killer's stare that says "give me the ball and get the hell out of the way." Opposing coaches have tried double-teams, triple-teams, zone defense, trash talk, Hack-a-Shaq... Nothing works. The man is programmed for clutch moments. It's genetic, and there's not a damn thing anyone can do about it. The budget, let's talk about it. Or actually, let's not, because it'll make you dizzy. We're beyond the luxury tax, beyond the second apron, we're in a zone that even the league's tax accountants struggle to calculate. The owner burns cash like others burn firewood, and he doesn't bat an eye. Every season this team doesn't win the title is a financial scandal. The pressure is absolute, the talent is maximal, and the margin for error is zero. Welcome to the world of superteams, where failure isn't an option, it's a public humiliation.
Matchday 1 — vs Detroit Engine-Roar
86-131 (L)
Tip-off! Stephen Curry gets us started! Let's go!
Stephen Curry forces up a double-clutch layup over the defense! Shaky emotions under pressure! Bad decision!
Stephen Curry throws it into the stands! What was that from this headliner!
Stephen Curry reacts too late to rotate! Hot head on the help side!
Stephen Curry mouths off and picks up a T! Limited stamina taking over!
Break! Stephen Curry grabs an ice bag and slaps it on his knee. Did you know Stephen Curry started basketball because he was terrible at soccer? Sometimes failure leads to greatness. Both teams return with fresh instructions from the coach.
Stephen Curry misfires from the left corner! This jersey-selling name searching for answers!
This jersey-selling name Stephen Curry has heavy legs! The pace has been brutal!
This jersey-selling name Stephen Curry with turnover number points! Shaky emotions under pressure is piling up!
Stephen Curry storms to the bench! This headliner is visibly upset!
Stephen Curry reflects on what could have been. Tendency to force bad shots the difference tonight.
Stephen Curry's gaze is cold, distant. Stephen Curry's gaze is hot, angry. I spent this game nervously chewing gum. I'm on my seventh piece. Off to bed! Or stay for 'Real Housewives of the DMV.' The line is around the block.
Matchday 2 — vs Miami Heart-Attack
127-97 (W)
Stephen Curry, this franchise guy, draws first blood! An alley-oop to start!
Stephen Curry goes coast to coast for a step-back three! This world-class player is relentless!
Stephen Curry with the help-side brilliant anticipation! This jersey-selling name always in position!
Stephen Curry with the transition assist! This max-contract guy pushing the pace with pure God-given talent!
This big-name player Stephen Curry switches defensive assignments on the fly! Next-level basketball IQ!
First half is done. Stephen Curry is chugging Gatorade like it's water. The staff told me Stephen Curry sings in the shower. Badly. Very badly. We're back! Flushed cheeks and hungry eyes on the players.
This jersey-selling name Stephen Curry is automatic along the baseline! A free throw drops again!
You can feel a hostile crowd through the screen! Stephen Curry in the spotlight!
Stephen Curry attacks the pick-and-roll to perfection! Chemistry on display!
Tacko Fall dribbles like a player possessed! Silky smooth technique unleashed!
Tacko Fall, this player nobody saw coming, with the post-game interview smile! An off-the-charts basketball IQ all night!
Stephen Curry blows a kiss to the camera. Stephen Curry blows twelve. Stephen Curry blocks the lens. Yours truly survived this game without losing his voice. It was touch and go. That's it for tonight. Coming up: 'True Confessions: I Put Ketchup on Pasta.'
Matchday 3 — vs Orlando Magic-Beans
91-101 (L)
This diamond in the rough Tacko Fall comes out aggressive! Opens with a fadeaway jumper from the left corner!
This raw talent Tacko Fall with a rare miss from downtown! Even the best stumble!
This established star Stephen Curry with a careless turnover! Gift-wrapped for the opponent!
This franchise guy Stephen Curry gives up the offensive rebound! Injury-prone body when boxing out!
Stephen Curry knocks down a fadeaway jumper driving to the hoop! Ice in the veins!
Break. Stephen Curry asks the medical staff for coffee. Request denied. They say Stephen Curry eats honey straight from the jar during timeouts. The bear of the hardwood. We resume. Eyes locked in, jaws clenched.
Stephen Curry goes to work and kicks the stanchion! This jersey-selling name losing composure!
This max-contract guy Stephen Curry misses the mark! A pull-up jumper goes begging from the left corner!
Tacko Fall reads the defense perfectly! A gym-rat work ethic and a sky-high basketball IQ!
Tacko Fall is gassed! This potential breakout star bent over at half court! Shaky emotions under pressure catching up!
Stephen Curry had the chances but couldn't convert. This franchise guy left wanting.
Stephen Curry clenches his left fist, unclenches, clenches again. Stephen Curry fidgets with his wristband nervously. On my end, I ate three chocolate bars during the timeouts. Sports make you hungry, even in the booth. See you tomorrow. In the meantime, it's 'Who Wants to Marry My Goldfish.' Good luck with that.
Matchday 4 — vs Philadelphia Injury-Report
114-95 (W)
Stephen Curry steps back onto the floor! The crowd roars for this certified bucket!
This who-is-this-guy player Tacko Fall does it again! A bucket with effortless precision!
This world-class player Stephen Curry with the weak-side rebound in traffic! Incredible help!
Stephen Curry, this tweener, runs the offense with next-level basketball IQ! Beautiful passing!
Stephen Curry spaces the floor perfectly! Great read of the system!
End of the second quarter. Stephen Curry is breathing so loud you can hear it from here. Little secret: Stephen Curry listens to Celine Dion to focus. I repeat, Celine Dion. Back to business. The players bounce around to warm up.
Tacko Fall, this surprise package, drops a half-court heave facing the rim! Pure artistry!
Tacko Fall, this little firecracker, gets the standing ovation! A crowd fully behind them!
Stephen Curry puts ego aside! The team comes first for this All-Star caliber talent!
Stephen Curry, this certified bucket, answers every challenge! That dawg mentality never fading!
Tacko Fall, this undersized dog, takes the final bow! A hug with the coach! Dominant display!
Tacko Fall cries tears of joy in Stephen Curry's arms. Stephen Curry is also crying but nobody knows why. While you were watching the game, I was desperately searching for my pen. Still haven't found it. Until next time! Up next: 'Kitchen Nightmares: Corporate Cafeteria.' This is gonna be good.
Matchday 5 — vs Phoenix No-Defense
120-95 (W)
Stephen Curry, this versatile guy, takes the court! The standing ovation is electric!
Stephen Curry, this versatile guy, uses every inch to deliver a floater!
Stephen Curry, this versatile guy, contests everything in the paint! Pure God-given talent on full display!
Tacko Fall with the outlet pass! Coast-to-coast assist! That dawg mentality on that one!
Stephen Curry, this established star, draws the double team and finds the open man! High IQ!
Halftime! Stephen Curry looks in the mirror and shakes his head. Did you know Stephen Curry keeps a photo of his dog in his right shoe? It's a Bichon. Back on the hardwood. The tension has gone up a notch.
Stephen Curry, this established star, knifes through for a buzzer beater from mid-range! Wow!
Deafening noise! Stephen Curry dribbles and the building shakes!
This certified bucket Stephen Curry unites the locker room! Silky smooth technique captain's mentality!
Stephen Curry, this do-it-all player, is on a mission! Nothing can stop this headliner right now!
Stephen Curry, this big-name player, embraces the teammates! A finger to the lips to hush the crowd! Sweet victory!
Stephen Curry pretends to faint from happiness. Tacko Fall pretends to call 911. Tonight I chewed through two pens. The office supply budget is going to explode. That's all! Coming up: 'Hotel Hell: Airbnb With No Lock Edition.' Chills guaranteed.
Matchday 6 — vs Los Angeles Nursing-Home
117-99 (W)
Stephen Curry, this combo guard, sets the tone immediately! Natural-born leadership from the jump!
Stephen Curry pulls up the ball with purpose! A deep three! This multi-time All-Star means business!
Stephen Curry digs in defensively! Nerves of steel when the team needs stops!
This certified bucket Stephen Curry creates for others! Unselfish play with a killer instinct!
Stephen Curry, this combo guard, exploits the mismatch at the buzzer! Smart play!
Halftime! Stephen Curry walks barefoot on the cold tunnel tiles. Did you know Stephen Curry started basketball because he was terrible at soccer? Sometimes failure leads to greatness. Jump ball to restart. Let the second half begin!
Tacko Fall dribbles and fires a tear drop! This little firecracker lighting it up!
Stephen Curry, this solid build, gestures for more noise! The crowd goes nuts!
Tacko Fall sacrifices the body taking the charge! This player nobody saw coming ultimate teammate!
Stephen Curry, this all-around player, embodies the spirit of competition! What a show!
Stephen Curry pumps the fist as the buzzer goes! This established star savors the win!
Stephen Curry jumps so high from joy he nearly touches the scoreboard. Almost. Confession: I nearly fell asleep during the second quarter. The third woke me right up. Thanks everyone! Up next: 'Ice Road Truckers: Uber Eats Delivery on a Rainy Night.'
Matchday 7 — vs Toronto Border-Patrol
118-87 (W)
This franchise guy Stephen Curry in the starting lineup! Let's see what this franchise guy brings!
Tacko Fall explodes the Spalding with flair and hits a layup! Sensational!
Stephen Curry with the no-look pass! This top-tier talent has eyes in the back of the head!
This max-contract guy Stephen Curry with a vintage sky hook! The old magic is still there!
Stephen Curry, this established star, shuts down the play in the paint! Lockdown defender!
Halftime! Stephen Curry is limping slightly heading off the court. Confession: Stephen Curry calls mom after every loss. And every win. And also on Tuesdays. The arena lights up, the players are back. Game on.
Stephen Curry with the tough layup through contact! This max-contract guy won't be denied!
Tacko Fall piles it on! A bucket extends the lead! No mercy tonight!
Stephen Curry asks the scorer's table for the score! This bonafide star forgot!
Stephen Curry throws the finger guns at the crowd! A salute to the fans after a thunderous slam!
Stephen Curry fades away into the tunnel with the W! This guy everybody knows all smiles!
Tacko Fall and Stephen Curry pound their chests like gorillas. The coach pretends not to know them. Tonight I chewed through two pens. The office supply budget is going to explode. We're done here. Up next: 'Top Chef: Microwave Edition.' Bon appetit.
Matchday 8 — vs Minnesota Ice-Wall
111-99 (W)
Stephen Curry looks dialed in from the start! A killer instinct preparation showing!
Stephen Curry dishes and scores! A deep three! This combo guard is a problem!
Stephen Curry with the chase-down ball recovery! What athleticism!
This big-name player Stephen Curry finds the open man! Assist and a bank shot!
Tacko Fall crosses over the ball out of the trap! Eyes in the back of the head under pressure!
Halftime. Tacko Fall is holding his ribs walking toward the tunnel. Little scoop: Tacko Fall logs every game in a notebook. With stars and smiley faces. At that age. The players emerge from the tunnel. Stern faces, clenched fists.
Stephen Curry answers back with a deep three! Next-level basketball IQ under pressure!
This max-contract guy Stephen Curry turns the hostile crowd into stunned silence!
Stephen Curry, this swiss-army-knife type, boxes out for the teammate! This multi-time All-Star doing the dirty work!
Stephen Curry dunks into the record books! This world-class player making memories!
Tacko Fall, this short king, carries the team to victory! MVP-level performance!
Stephen Curry does a belly slide on the court. Stephen Curry does a back slide. The hardwood is ruined. Confession: I nearly fell asleep during the second quarter. The third woke me right up. Good night! And now, 'The Bachelor: Stray Cat Edition.' Who will find love in this dumpster?
Matchday 9 — vs Houston Blast-Off
106-117 (L)
Stephen Curry takes the floor with that look in his eyes! He came to play tonight!
Tacko Fall with a rough hook shot at the top of the key! Lack of consistency at the worst time!
This certified bucket Stephen Curry commits the 5-second violation! Clock management injury-prone body!
Stephen Curry gambles for the steal and pays the price! Lack of consistency!
Stephen Curry with iron discipline finds the angle for a floater!
Halftime whistle! Stephen Curry grabs a towel and collapses on the bench. Intel: Stephen Curry once called an imaginary timeout in the middle of a game. The ref actually hesitated. The players are back on the court. Here we go again!
Stephen Curry slams the Wilson in frustration! Sometimes predictable game on full display!
A deep three attempt by Stephen Curry falls short! Lack of consistency in the legs!
This multi-time All-Star Stephen Curry attacks the closeout! Driving past the over-eager defender!
This franchise guy Stephen Curry is a warrior but the body says no! The 48 regulation minutes of war!
Stephen Curry sits alone on the bench. This big-name player processing the defeat.
Stephen Curry clenches his left fist, unclenches, clenches again. Stephen Curry fidgets with his wristband nervously. During the game, I got a text from my mom: 'Stop yelling, I can hear you from here.' She lives 120 miles away. Off to bed! Or stay for 'Real Housewives of the DMV.' The line is around the block.
Matchday 10 — vs Denver Horse-Track
118-94 (W)
Tacko Fall, this guy nobody was talking about, wins the opening tip! Great start for the team!
Tacko Fall catches fire! And it's a buzzer beater! Nerves of steel taking over!
Stephen Curry, this smooth operator, recovers and contests! Never-give-up effort fueled by night-in night-out consistency!
This elite player Stephen Curry with the wraparound pass! How did that get through!
Stephen Curry, this All-Star caliber talent, orchestrates the delay game! Nerves of steel in action!
Halftime! Stephen Curry walks barefoot on the cold tunnel tiles. Intel: Stephen Curry asked Denver Horse-Track for their energy drink recipe. They refused. Tipoff! The ref blows the whistle, the ball is in the air.
Stephen Curry, this smooth operator, rises above and hammers an alley-oop!
Stephen Curry explodes and the crowd chants the name! Listen to that noise!
Stephen Curry, this do-it-all player, sets the perfect screen! Eyes in the back of the head for the team!
This elite player Stephen Curry channels the inner champion! Next-level basketball IQ at its peak!
That's the game! Tacko Fall finishes with a monster performance! This potential breakout star victorious!
Stephen Curry hugs the mascot. Stephen Curry hugs the referee. Awkward. I spent the evening explaining basketball rules to my new intern. He still thinks you can walk with the ball. That's all for tonight. And now: 'Deadliest Catch: Rush Hour on the Beltway.' Documentary.
Matchday 11 — vs New York Over-Timers
98-104 (L)
This bonafide star Stephen Curry opens the scoring! A free throw! Early advantage!
Stephen Curry can't buy a bucket! Another miss under the basket! Frustrating!
Stephen Curry, this all-around player, steps out of bounds with the ball! Mental lapse!
This bonafide star Stephen Curry can't recover! Scored on at the buzzer! Limited stamina!
Stephen Curry explodes the ball with eyes in the back of the head. And it drops! Nothing you can do!
That's a cut. Stephen Curry stumbles slightly reaching the locker room. Rumor has it Stephen Curry tried to recruit the pizza delivery guy for the team. The guy was 6'9". Break's over, time for basketball. Let's go.
Stephen Curry glares at the scoreboard! This certified bucket not happy with the situation!
Stephen Curry fades away but the shot rims out! Sometimes predictable game rears its ugly head!
This jersey-selling name Stephen Curry sets the back screen! A gym-rat work ethic off-ball contribution!
This multi-time All-Star Stephen Curry can barely jump! The springs are gone at the top of the key!
Stephen Curry lets fly to the tunnel in disappointment. This big-name player will learn from this.
Stephen Curry closes his eyes walking out. Stephen Curry keeps his wide open, fixed, empty. Confession: I bet against my favorite team tonight. Superstition. It works half the time. That's all for today. Up next: 'Dateline: The True Cost of a Cup of Yogurt.' Deep investigation.
Matchday 12 — vs Cleveland Twin-Towers
120-103 (W)
The game begins and Stephen Curry is ready! You can see freakish explosiveness written all over his face!
This guy everybody knows Stephen Curry capitalizes at half court! A free throw with nerves of steel!
Tacko Fall, this compact dynamo, clamps down in the clutch! Elite a crucial offensive board!
Tacko Fall with the lob pass facing the rim! This guy nobody was talking about to the teammate! Boom!
Stephen Curry, this All-Star caliber talent, manipulates the defense with the eyes! Next-level basketball IQ!
End of the second quarter. Stephen Curry is breathing so loud you can hear it from here. Small detail: Stephen Curry wears mismatched socks every game. Calls it a strategy. The players step onto the hardwood once more. The second half starts now.
This guy everybody knows Stephen Curry with a beautiful buzzer-beater along the baseline! Poetry in motion!
An electric crowd as Stephen Curry, this smooth operator, is introduced! Goosebumps!
This certified bucket Stephen Curry celebrates the teammate's score! It's about the team!
Stephen Curry, this versatile guy, sets the tone with natural-born leadership! Leader!
Stephen Curry, this smooth operator, acknowledges the fans! An incredible energy! A chest bump!
Tacko Fall and Stephen Curry cradle the game ball like a baby. Stephen Curry takes a photo. As for me, I powered through three coffees and a gas station sandwich. The glamorous life of sports journalism. Good night! Up next: 'America's Got Talent: Mouth Noises Edition.' The judges are baffled.
Matchday 13 — vs Boston Ring-Chasers
118-104 (W)
Stephen Curry fires up the crowd to open the game! This elite player starting strong!
Stephen Curry pulls up and drills an alley-oop! Can't teach that!
Stephen Curry, this all-around player, covers ground to get the rebound in traffic! Wow!
This world-class player Stephen Curry orchestrates the offense in the paint! Maestro!
This dude out of nowhere Tacko Fall uses the floater over this lightning-quick little man coverage! Smart!
Halftime whistle. Stephen Curry spits into the trash can walking into the locker room. Locker room intel: Stephen Curry has a tattoo of a basketball hoop on his butt. That's commitment. Break's over, the players take their positions.
A fadeaway jumper from Stephen Curry! This guy everybody knows reminding everyone why they're on top!
Stephen Curry soaks in a cathedral silence! This established star living for these moments!
Stephen Curry rises up the orange with patience! This elite player trusting the system!
Stephen Curry, this big-name player, has the crowd in the palm of the hand! An electric crowd!
Final buzzer! Stephen Curry is the hero! This established star with a game for the ages!
Stephen Curry cries tears of joy in Stephen Curry's arms. Stephen Curry is also crying but nobody knows why. On my end, I ate peanuts through the entire third quarter. Salt is my drug of choice. Off to bed! Or stay for 'Real Housewives of the DMV.' The line is around the block.
Matchday 14 — vs San Antonio Skyscrapers
93-108 (L)
Stephen Curry explodes with energy from the opening whistle! This certified bucket locked in!
A step-back three from Stephen Curry hits the iron! Tendency to rush under the spotlight!
This multi-time All-Star Stephen Curry forces a pass into double coverage! Picked off!
Stephen Curry falls asleep on the weak side! Limited stamina exposed!
An and-one by Stephen Curry at the buzzer! Unreal swagger in every fiber!
Well-deserved break. Stephen Curry looks like someone who just ran a marathon. Exclusive info: Stephen Curry is banned for life from the McDonald's near the arena. The details remain murky. We pick up right where we left off. Time to play.
Stephen Curry gets a technical for complaining! Heavy feet on full display!
Tacko Fall misses the open look! This player nobody saw coming can't believe it! Occasional mental lapses!
Stephen Curry spins to the weak side! This franchise guy exploiting the rotation!
Tacko Fall launches a step slower than usual! Tendency to force bad shots in the tank!
Stephen Curry, this do-it-all player, trudges off the field house. Lessons to take from this one.
Tacko Fall slams his fist on the bench. Stephen Curry places his palm flat, as if to calm the surface. My evening in summary: yell, drink coffee, yell again, spill the coffee, yell some more. Thanks everyone. Up next: 'Survivor: Open-Plan Office.' Whoever makes it through the 5 PM meeting wins.
Matchday 15 — vs Oklahoma City Treasure-Chest
95-117 (L)
And we're underway! Stephen Curry touches the leather first! This bonafide star looks eager!
This max-contract guy Stephen Curry whiffs on a floater! The crowd groans!
Stephen Curry fades away the ball right to the defense! Costly mistake by this max-contract guy!
Tacko Fall gets crossed over! This rising star left frozen in transition!
Stephen Curry with an incredible thunderous slam at half court! Standing ovation!
The players file out. Stephen Curry exchanges a tense look with the coach. Locker room anecdote: Stephen Curry talks to a sock called 'Assistant Coach.' We don't judge. We're back! The coach drew stuff on the whiteboard, let's see if it works.
Tacko Fall, this scrappy guard, throws the hands up! Exasperated from the right corner!
This big-name player Stephen Curry rattles it out! So close yet so far off the pick and roll!
This who-is-this-guy player Tacko Fall adjusts at halftime and comes out sharp! Adaptation!
This All-Star caliber talent Stephen Curry calls for a sub! Can't go anymore! Shaky emotions under pressure taking its toll!
Stephen Curry, this reliable star, takes the loss hard. Tendency to rush at the wrong moments.
Stephen Curry sighs so loudly that the reporters hear it. Stephen Curry winces. During the game, my colleague ordered sushi. It arrived at the final buzzer. Perfect timing. That's all! Coming up: 'Hotel Hell: Airbnb With No Lock Edition.' Chills guaranteed.
My Team ends the season #7 with a 9W-6L record. Season MVP: Stephen Curry.
Season journal
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