My dream starting five — basketball_team 🇨🇳
5 members · TeamBranch
赛季日志
积分榜
| # | Team | 胜 | 负 | Pts |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | Detroit Engine-Roar | 15 | 0 | 30 |
| 2 | Boston Ring-Chasers | 12 | 3 | 24 |
| 3 | Oklahoma City Treasure-Chest | 12 | 3 | 24 |
| 4 | New York Over-Timers | 11 | 4 | 22 |
| 5 | My Team | 10 | 5 | 20 |
| 6 | San Antonio Skyscrapers | 9 | 6 | 18 |
| 7 | Cleveland Twin-Towers | 9 | 6 | 18 |
| 8 | Houston Blast-Off | 9 | 6 | 18 |
| 9 | Denver Horse-Track | 7 | 8 | 14 |
| 10 | Toronto Border-Patrol | 7 | 8 | 14 |
| 11 | Philadelphia Injury-Report | 6 | 9 | 12 |
| 12 | Minnesota Ice-Wall | 4 | 11 | 8 |
| 13 | Los Angeles Nursing-Home | 3 | 12 | 6 |
| 14 | Phoenix No-Defense | 2 | 13 | 4 |
| 15 | Orlando Magic-Beans | 2 | 13 | 4 |
| 16 | Miami Heart-Attack | 2 | 13 | 4 |
季前赛
Get comfortable because tonight, we are about to witness something special. I can feel it. It's in the air, it's in the eyes, it's in the low rumble of 20,000 people who know they're about to live through a moment. The franchise about to step onto this court has seen it all, lived it all: legendary triple-doubles, buzzer-beating heartbreaks, 15-point fourth-quarter comebacks, and losses that shatter careers. But they're here, still and always, with that burning desire to tear everything apart. The team with no name, baby! Yeah sure, it's a team sport, we all agree on that. But when you've got 科怀·伦纳德 on your roster, the word "team" basically means him plus four guys who pass him the ball. Standing at 201 cm, a first step more explosive than a rocket launch, and a fadeaway so silky that even the defenders applaud as they watch him score. Scouts had this dude flagged at 14. By 16, he was beating pros. Today? He's embarrassing them. But what truly terrifies opponents isn't his highlights, it's his head. Look into his eyes during crunch time. There's nothing there. No stress, no doubt, just a killer's stare that says "give me the ball and get the hell out of the way." Opposing coaches have tried double-teams, triple-teams, zone defense, trash talk, Hack-a-Shaq... Nothing works. The man is programmed for clutch moments. It's genetic, and there's not a damn thing anyone can do about it. The budget, let's talk about it. Or actually, let's not, because it'll make you dizzy. We're beyond the luxury tax, beyond the second apron, we're in a zone that even the league's tax accountants struggle to calculate. The owner burns cash like others burn firewood, and he doesn't bat an eye. Every season this team doesn't win the title is a financial scandal. The pressure is absolute, the talent is maximal, and the margin for error is zero. Welcome to the world of superteams, where failure isn't an option, it's a public humiliation.
比赛日 1 — vs Detroit Engine-Roar
91-126 (负)
Tip-off! 科怀·伦纳德 gets us started! Let's go!
Alvin Robertson forces up a double-clutch layup over the defense! Shaky emotions under pressure! Bad decision!
科怀·伦纳德 throws it into the stands! What was that from this player on the come-up!
Matt Barnes reacts too late to rotate! Hot head on the help side!
Matt Barnes mouths off and picks up a T! Limited stamina taking over!
Break! 科怀·伦纳德 grabs an ice bag and slaps it on his knee. Did you know 科怀·伦纳德 started basketball because he was terrible at soccer? Sometimes failure leads to greatness. Both teams return with fresh instructions from the coach.
Stephen Curry misfires from the left corner! This jersey-selling name searching for answers!
This name that's buzzing Matt Barnes has heavy legs! The pace has been brutal!
This name that's buzzing Matt Barnes with turnover number points! Shaky emotions under pressure is piling up!
Stephen Curry storms to the bench! This headliner is visibly upset!
Matt Barnes reflects on what could have been. Tendency to force bad shots the difference tonight.
科怀·伦纳德's gaze is cold, distant. Alvin Robertson's gaze is hot, angry. I spent this game nervously chewing gum. I'm on my seventh piece. Off to bed! Or stay for 'Real Housewives of the DMV.' The line is around the block.
比赛日 2 — vs Miami Heart-Attack
133-91 (胜)
Alvin Robertson, this league veteran, draws first blood! An alley-oop to start!
Stephen Curry goes coast to coast for a step-back three! This world-class player is relentless!
科怀·伦纳德 with the bounce pass! This league veteran threading it perfectly!
This multi-time All-Star Stephen Curry with a cold-blooded double-clutch layup! No conscience!
Stephen Curry anticipates the cut and deflects the Wilson! This established star reading minds!
The players disappear into the tunnel. Stephen Curry asks for an ice pack. Anecdote: Stephen Curry fell asleep on the bench during an exhibition game. Still got named MVP. Break's over, the players take their positions.
Stephen Curry with the tough sky hook through contact! This max-contract guy won't be denied!
Stephen Curry, this swiss-army-knife type, caps off a dominant performance! Ridiculous creativity from start to finish!
This name that's buzzing 科怀·伦纳德 celebrates too early! A sky hook didn't count! Awkward!
This name that's buzzing 科怀·伦纳德 holds up three fingers! A bench mob celebration after the triple!
Tony Battie, this hidden prospect, embraces the teammates! A primal scream! Sweet victory!
Stephen Curry moonwalks across the hardwood. Alvin Robertson attempts the worm. One of them pulls it off. On my end, I discovered the arena's coffee machine was broken. The game nearly went uncommentated. We're done for tonight. And now: 'Ancient Aliens: The True History of the Coffee Break.'
比赛日 3 — vs Orlando Magic-Beans
122-91 (胜)
Tony Battie, this hungry young player, embraces the wild stands! Game on!
A bank shot from Stephen Curry! This guy everybody knows is putting on a show tonight!
Alvin Robertson a ball recovery with authority! This tweener protecting the paint!
This next-level player 科怀·伦纳德 with the behind-the-back dish! Highlight-reel pass!
Matt Barnes, this seasoned vet, manages the clock beautifully in the first half!
Halftime. Stephen Curry wolfs down an energy bar in two bites. Fun fact: Stephen Curry blocked a shot in the finals... And dislocated a thumb celebrating. Classic. The locker room empties, the court fills up. Act 2.
An and-one from 科怀·伦纳德! That's a killer instinct at the highest level!
Listen to that roar! Matt Barnes pulls up and the place explodes!
Matt Barnes, this up-and-coming baller, runs the play exactly as drawn! Execution!
Alvin Robertson leaves it all on the floor! This well-respected player with an off-the-charts basketball IQ effort!
Tony Battie launches into the tunnel with the W! This potential breakout star all smiles!
Alvin Robertson points both hands at the sky. 科怀·伦纳德 points at Alvin Robertson. Matt Barnes points at the exit. I learned backstage that 科怀·伦纳德 also does volunteer firefighter on weekends. That explains those reflexes. Good night everyone! Up next: 'Worst Cooks in America: Boiling an Egg Without Breaking It.' Challenge accepted.
比赛日 4 — vs Philadelphia Injury-Report
135-89 (胜)
Tony Battie rises up into position! This diamond in the rough not wasting any time!
This player on the come-up 科怀·伦纳德 finishes with authority! A thunderous slam off the pick and roll!
科怀·伦纳德 goes to work and dishes! Gorgeous feed off the pick and roll! Unreal swagger!
科怀·伦纳德 dribbles the ball with purpose! An off-balance shot! This well-respected player means business!
Matt Barnes with the huge flawless defensive rotation at the top of the key! This player making noise says no!
The players head to the locker room. Stephen Curry is sweating like a racehorse. True story: Stephen Curry walked into the wrong locker room during his first game against Philadelphia Injury-Report. Awkward. Here we go again. The players have changed jerseys.
科怀·伦纳德 scores at will! A free throw from mid-range! This solid pro domination!
Stephen Curry fades away with confidence! The game is well in hand for this top-tier talent!
This name that's buzzing Matt Barnes calls for the rock but trips over the baseline! Comedy gold!
Alvin Robertson pulls up to center court! A raised fist! This established player owns the moment!
That's the game! Alvin Robertson finishes with a monster performance! This up-and-coming baller victorious!
Matt Barnes pretends to plant a flag at center court. Tony Battie stands at attention. Tonight I chewed through two pens. The office supply budget is going to explode. That's it. Up next: 'Anthony Bourdain Visits: The Park-and-Ride in Poughkeepsie.' Culture shock.
比赛日 5 — vs Phoenix No-Defense
108-104 (胜)
Alvin Robertson, this swiss-army-knife type, announced to huge cheers! A Playoff atmosphere!
科怀·伦纳德 a defensive rebound and starts the fast break! Defense wins championships!
Matt Barnes with a wild attempt! This respected competitor not finding the range tonight!
A free throw from Matt Barnes! This player on the come-up reminding everyone why they're on top!
Alvin Robertson, this legit talent, orchestrates the delay game! Iron discipline in action!
That's a cut. Stephen Curry stumbles slightly reaching the locker room. The staff told me Stephen Curry sings in the shower. Badly. Very badly. The players jog toward the court. The air is electric.
Alvin Robertson pulls up past everyone in the extra period! A finger roll! Legendary!
This jersey-selling name Stephen Curry forces the bad pass! Freakish explosiveness creating turnovers!
科怀·伦纳德 takes off and the noise is deafening! A boiling cauldron! Wow!
Stephen Curry with the gutsy and-one driving to the hoop! Night-in night-out consistency on full display!
This world-class player Stephen Curry secures the win with night-in night-out consistency! Another one in the bag!
Alvin Robertson rips the net off the rim. Stephen Curry wraps it around his neck like a scarf. Behind the scenes, the cameraman told me I was making faces during free throws. I had no idea. This was your favorite commentator. Coming up: 'Extreme Makeover: Garage Edition.' Don't change the channel. Or do.
比赛日 6 — vs Los Angeles Nursing-Home
115-79 (胜)
Alvin Robertson fires up the crowd to open the game! This dude putting the league on notice starting strong!
Matt Barnes, this player on the come-up, threads the needle for a double-clutch layup from the left corner!
This hidden prospect Tony Battie with assist number lengths ahead! A killer instinct on display!
Matt Barnes, this player making noise, knifes through for a buzzer-beater along the baseline! Wow!
Tony Battie strips the ball cleanly! Veteran move right there!
Halftime whistle! 科怀·伦纳德 slides down against the hallway wall. Physio's confession: 科怀·伦纳德 purrs when you massage his calves. Like a cat. A big cat. The arena lights up, the players are back. Game on.
Stephen Curry, this guy everybody knows, drops a buzzer-beater from downtown! Pure artistry!
Alvin Robertson even the deep bench is scoring! Complete team effort tonight!
Stephen Curry, this swiss-army-knife type, tries the spin move and gets dizzy! This headliner wobbling!
Tony Battie with the chest bump after the and-one! This dark horse is fired up!
Tony Battie, this guy nobody was talking about, soaks in the moment! Victory off the pick and roll! A fist pump toward the bench!
Tony Battie performs an absolutely ridiculous victory dance. Matt Barnes imitates it. It's worse. Tonight my voice traveled three octaves. Baritone to soprano. Basketball does that to you. Good night! Up next: 'America's Got Talent: Mouth Noises Edition.' The judges are baffled.
比赛日 7 — vs Toronto Border-Patrol
98-99 (负)
Stephen Curry fades away onto the floor! The crowd roars for this jersey-selling name!
Matt Barnes penetrates past everyone for a devastating dunk! This beanpole on a mission!
This total unknown Tony Battie commits the and-one foul! Shaky emotions under pressure in positioning!
Matt Barnes gets a clean look but sometimes predictable game costs the bucket!
Alvin Robertson steals and scores! This legit talent cutting the gap in the paint!
Rest time. 科怀·伦纳德 isolates in a corner of the locker room, headphones on. Fun fact: 科怀·伦纳德 blocked a shot in the finals... And dislocated a thumb celebrating. Classic. Second half! The hardwood is about to shake again.
Stephen Curry spins into a dead end! Hot head in late-game situations!
This name that's buzzing Matt Barnes hangs the head after the miss! Deflated on the low block!
科怀·伦纳德, this beanpole, evolves before our eyes! A dramatic twist!
This jersey-selling name Stephen Curry picks up the foul on a clutch free throw! Terrible timing!
This up-and-coming baller Alvin Robertson leaves the den with head held high. Fought to the end.
Matt Barnes pulls his cap down over his eyes. Stephen Curry doesn't have a cap, and it shows. Tonight I chewed through two pens. The office supply budget is going to explode. See you soon. Coming up: 'Extreme Couponing: Family of Eight at Walmart.' Double episode.
比赛日 8 — vs Minnesota Ice-Wall
110-81 (胜)
This well-respected player Alvin Robertson gets the crowd going early! The energy is building!
A free throw by Matt Barnes! The crowd erupts! An off-the-charts basketball IQ personified!
Tony Battie, this potential breakout star, dishes to the hot hand! Smart basketball!
Stephen Curry dunks through traffic and scores! Incredible finish!
Tony Battie, this oversized freak, blankets the shooter on the low block! No daylight!
The locker room. Alvin Robertson sprawls out full-length on the bench. Fun fact: Alvin Robertson failed the driving test three times. On the court it's a different story, thankfully. We're back at it. The crowd had time to reload at the snack bar.
This up-and-coming baller Alvin Robertson does it again! A scoop layup with effortless precision!
Tony Battie, this raw talent, waves to the crowd early! The outcome settled!
This hooper's hooper Alvin Robertson passes to the opponent! Gift exchange along the baseline!
Tony Battie pumps the fist! This potential breakout star feeling it under the basket! A team high-five!
Matt Barnes can breathe! The win is secured, it's over!
科怀·伦纳德 runs to the coach and lifts the coach up. Not thrilled but smiles anyway. I discovered tonight that my mic was off for three minutes. Three minutes of pure genius, lost forever. Thanks everyone. Up next: 'Survivor: Open-Plan Office.' Whoever makes it through the 5 PM meeting wins.
比赛日 9 — vs Houston Blast-Off
120-96 (胜)
Stephen Curry looks dialed in from the start! An unmatched feel for the game preparation showing!
Alvin Robertson, this legit talent, unleashes a step-back three in the paint! Bang!
Stephen Curry forces the shot-clock violation! Nerves of steel on full display!
Matt Barnes attacks the pill with precision! Assist under the basket! Floor general!
This respected competitor Alvin Robertson switches defensive assignments on the fly! Natural-born leadership!
Coach calls everyone back. Matt Barnes drags his feet toward the tunnel. Fun fact: Matt Barnes got rejected at a casting for a deodorant commercial. The irony. Let's go, we're back. The crowd claps in rhythm.
A free throw by Alvin Robertson in the paint! A killer instinct in every fiber!
This player making noise Alvin Robertson brings immense pressure to a new level! Incredible scene!
This rising star Tony Battie claps for the rookie! Encouragement from this rising star!
This reliable star Stephen Curry silences the noise! A gym-rat work ethic locked in! Nothing else matters!
科怀·伦纳德, this solid pro, high-fives the bench! A primal scream! Team effort!
Tony Battie takes Alvin Robertson by the hand and they bow to the crowd like stage actors. I spent the fourth quarter standing. Not by choice. My chair gave out in the third. Thanks for being here. Now put down the remote, it's time for 'Wheel of Misfortune.'
比赛日 10 — vs Denver Horse-Track
93-116 (负)
Alvin Robertson opens with a half-court heave! This guy with a proven track record making an early statement!
Tony Battie can't buy a bucket! Another miss from downtown! Frustrating!
Tony Battie drives into a trap! Sometimes predictable game when reading the defense!
Tony Battie loses the screen battle! Defense that's basically a suggestion around the picks!
Tony Battie explodes and it's a euro-step! This dark horse proving the doubters wrong!
Halftime. Tony Battie throws his towel on the floor walking in. Did you know? Tony Battie has a personal mini-fridge in the locker room. Nobody knows what's inside. Back on the hardwood. The tension has gone up a notch.
Tony Battie, this colossus, throws the hands up! Exasperated at half court!
Stephen Curry clanks another one off the rim! This multi-time All-Star needs to find rhythm!
科怀·伦纳德 pushes the pace in transition! Eyes in the back of the head showing in every play!
Stephen Curry, this established star, sucking wind after that sprint! This ball game of battle!
Tony Battie launches past the media. This dark horse not in the mood to talk.
Alvin Robertson walks like someone carrying the weight of the world. 科怀·伦纳德 drags one foot after the other. I spent this game nervously chewing gum. I'm on my seventh piece. Thanks for tonight. Up next: 'American Ninja Warrior: No Elevator Edition.' Sixth floor, no landing.
比赛日 11 — vs New York Over-Timers
107-117 (负)
Tony Battie, this absolute unit, sets the tone immediately! Natural-born leadership from the jump!
A pull-up jumper from Tony Battie goes in and out! Heartbreaking at the top of the key!
This guy with a proven track record Matt Barnes with a careless turnover! Gift-wrapped for the opponent!
Stephen Curry gets burned on the drive! Lack of consistency in lateral movement!
Stephen Curry, this swiss-army-knife type, overpowers for a reverse layup! Size matters!
Rest. Alvin Robertson buries his head in a wet towel and doesn't move. Confession: Alvin Robertson tried yoga. Lasted two sessions before declaring it a combat sport. On to the next chapter. The court is just waiting for the ball.
Tony Battie fades away and kicks the stanchion! This dark horse losing composure!
Stephen Curry spins but the shot rims out! Shaky emotions under pressure rears its ugly head!
This respected competitor 科怀·伦纳德 runs the pick-and-pop to perfection! Tactical mastery!
Matt Barnes, this mountain of a man, with tired legs from downtown! Sometimes predictable game slowing this guy with a proven track record down!
This world-class player Stephen Curry shakes hands and moves on. In the end, sometimes predictable game proved costly.
Matt Barnes replays the score in his head on a loop. Tony Battie tries to think about something else. During the third quarter, I spilled my soup. Yes, I had soup in the booth. Don't judge. That's all for tonight. And now: 'Deadliest Catch: Rush Hour on the Beltway.' Documentary.
比赛日 12 — vs Cleveland Twin-Towers
95-114 (负)
This guy with a proven track record Alvin Robertson comes out firing! A double-clutch layup in the first minute!
Tony Battie, this walking skyscraper, gets the look but can't convert under the basket!
Matt Barnes, this colossus, commits the travel! Defense that's basically a suggestion in the footwork!
Alvin Robertson, this combo guard, gets exploited in the switch! Sometimes predictable game exposed in the mismatch!
Tony Battie shoots and scores! A double-clutch layup! This giant is a problem!
The players disappear into the tunnel. 科怀·伦纳德 asks for an ice pack. Locker room anecdote: 科怀·伦纳德 talks to a sock called 'Assistant Coach.' We don't judge. We're back! The coach drew stuff on the whiteboard, let's see if it works.
Matt Barnes mutters to himself walking back! This name that's buzzing fighting inner demons!
Alvin Robertson misfires from way beyond the arc! Even this player on the come-up has off nights!
Matt Barnes, this absolute unit, exploits the mismatch under the basket! Smart play!
This unknown gem Tony Battie is a warrior but the body says no! The 48 regulation minutes of war!
Stephen Curry, this world-class player, will be back stronger. This defeat fuels the fire.
科怀·伦纳德 mutters 'damn' under his breath. Matt Barnes says 'yeah' in the same tone. Tonight I yelled so loud the guy in the next booth asked me to keep it down. Mid-game. That's it for tonight. Coming up: 'Nailed It: Cakes Ruined by My Mother-in-Law.'
比赛日 13 — vs Boston Ring-Chasers
107-88 (胜)
Stephen Curry, this smooth operator, is introduced and the arena explodes! This established star is in the building!
Stephen Curry, this combo guard, showcases next-level basketball IQ with a gorgeous bucket!
Alvin Robertson, this solid build, contests everything from the right corner! Night-in night-out consistency on full display!
This player on the come-up Alvin Robertson with the wraparound pass! How did that get through!
This player making noise Alvin Robertson adjusts the angle mid-drive! Iron discipline body control!
Halftime. The doctor examines 科怀·伦纳德's shoulder while the others catch their breath. Did you know? 科怀·伦纳德 tried to become a rapper before basketball. The world dodged a bullet. We're back at it. The crowd had time to reload at the snack bar.
Stephen Curry, this swiss-army-knife type, takes over at half court. A buzzer beater! That's elite!
This player making noise Matt Barnes acknowledges the fans! A packed arena of mutual respect!
This top-tier talent Stephen Curry defers to the hot hand! Smart basketball!
Remember this moment! Alvin Robertson is making history with a reverse layup!
This dude out of nowhere Tony Battie thanks the fans! The crowd is on its feet! What a ride!
Alvin Robertson and Stephen Curry leap onto each other like kids. Tony Battie comes sprinting in and crushes them both. During halftime, I tried to interview the mascot. It ignored me. I'll recover eventually. Good evening! Now: 'Destination Unknown: The Roundabout in Scranton, PA.' Total adventure.
比赛日 14 — vs San Antonio Skyscrapers
105-96 (胜)
This legit talent Alvin Robertson in the starting lineup! Let's see what this legit talent brings!
Tony Battie buries a buzzer beater from the right corner! This who-is-this-guy player is on fire tonight!
This dude putting the league on notice Matt Barnes reads the play and intercepts! Brilliant anticipation!
Stephen Curry, this combo guard, drops the dime! Natural-born leadership passing on display!
Tony Battie rises up the ball out of the trap! Nerves of steel under pressure!
Halftime. 科怀·伦纳德 is holding his ribs walking toward the tunnel. Juicy anecdote: 科怀·伦纳德 was caught dancing the Macarena in the showers. Alone. Both teams emerge from the tunnel. The second half can begin.
This hungry young player Tony Battie converts from way beyond the arc! A fadeaway jumper right on cue!
This name that's buzzing 科怀·伦纳德 gets the crowd into it! A boiling cauldron at fever pitch!
Matt Barnes rises up the orange into the right hands! This league veteran quarterback!
Stephen Curry, this tweener, carries the weight of the team on those shoulders!
This reliable star Stephen Curry seals the deal! Victory with nerves of steel!
Matt Barnes does a cartwheel at center court. Tony Battie tries one too and eats it. During halftime, I tried to interview the mascot. It ignored me. I'll recover eventually. That's a wrap! Coming up: 'American Idol: Accountant Edition.' Singing, dancing, and spreadsheets.
比赛日 15 — vs Oklahoma City Treasure-Chest
106-104 (胜)
This newcomer Tony Battie comes out aggressive! Opens with a buzzer-beater on the low block!
This franchise guy Stephen Curry with a perfect contest at half court! Intimidating!
Stephen Curry, this combo guard, can't get a two-handed slam to drop! Cold as ice tonight!
Alvin Robertson attacks the pill with flair and hits a bank shot! Sensational!
科怀·伦纳德 makes the hockey pass! Night-in night-out consistency finding the extra pass!
The players disappear into the tunnel. Tony Battie asks for an ice pack. Fun fact: Tony Battie blocked a shot in the finals... And dislocated a thumb celebrating. Classic. Tipoff! The ball bounces, the arena vibrates, we're back.
Stephen Curry, this elite player, rises to the occasion! A buzzer-beater facing the rim! Huge!
科怀·伦纳德 times it perfectly and rejects the shot! A rebound in traffic off the pick and roll!
Stephen Curry dunks in front of the home faithful! A roaring arena! Beautiful!
Matt Barnes, this league veteran, orchestrates the last possession! A catch-and-shoot triple! Perfection!
科怀·伦纳德, this player making noise, with the post-game interview smile! Next-level basketball IQ all night!
Tony Battie and Alvin Robertson pound their chests like gorillas. The coach pretends not to know them. My wife texted me: 'when are you coming home?' I said 'after the game.' That was two hours ago. Thanks for tonight. And now: '60 Minutes: The Secrets of the Office Coffee Machine.'
My Team ends the season #5 with a 10W-5L record. Season MVP: 科怀·伦纳德.
Season journal
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