My dream starting five — basketball_team 🇺🇾
5 miembros · TeamBranch
Diario de temporada
Clasificación
| # | Team | V | D | Pts |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | Detroit Engine-Roar | 14 | 1 | 28 |
| 2 | Boston Ring-Chasers | 13 | 2 | 26 |
| 3 | Oklahoma City Treasure-Chest | 12 | 3 | 24 |
| 4 | Cleveland Twin-Towers | 11 | 4 | 22 |
| 5 | San Antonio Skyscrapers | 10 | 5 | 20 |
| 6 | Denver Horse-Track | 10 | 5 | 20 |
| 7 | New York Over-Timers | 10 | 5 | 20 |
| 8 | Minnesota Ice-Wall | 9 | 6 | 18 |
| 9 | Houston Blast-Off | 7 | 8 | 14 |
| 10 | My Team | 5 | 10 | 10 |
| 11 | Toronto Border-Patrol | 4 | 11 | 8 |
| 12 | Miami Heart-Attack | 4 | 11 | 8 |
| 13 | Phoenix No-Defense | 3 | 12 | 6 |
| 14 | Philadelphia Injury-Report | 3 | 12 | 6 |
| 15 | Orlando Magic-Beans | 3 | 12 | 6 |
| 16 | Los Angeles Nursing-Home | 2 | 13 | 4 |
Pretemporada
Good evening everyone and fasten your seatbelts because tonight we are not doing this gently. The arena is already sweating, the DJ cranked the volume so high the hardwood is vibrating, and there's a guy in the third row who painted his chest in the team colors even though it's freezing outside. That's devotion. That's basketball madness. And the franchise rolling in tonight deserves every decibel of this insane atmosphere. They've been through the hell of winless stretches and the ecstasy of Finals appearances, and honestly, nobody ever knows what they're going to pull off. That's what makes this sport so damn beautiful. The team with no name, baby! Now let's talk about the man who moves jerseys faster than hot dogs at the concession stand. Tyrese Haliburton. Just the name sends chills through the building. Standing at 196 cm, arms that cover half the court, and a basketball IQ so fast that defenders feel like they're playing in slow motion. This man doesn't walk, he glides. He doesn't jump, he launches into orbit. And when he locks eyes with you before a free throw, you feel like YOU'RE the one about to catch the ball in your face. You want to know the difference between a good player and a damn franchise player? It's the fourth quarter. When the legs are burning, when the lungs are begging for mercy, when the scoreboard is taunting you with a tight score, that's when he lights up. Like a diesel engine finally hitting its temperature. The first three quarters are the warm-up. The fourth quarter is his hunting ground. And the prey? It's the teams that thought they had a chance. And because this season couldn't possibly be normal, the coach went out and signed Khalil Everage. The man. Is. An actor. I'm going to let that marinate for two seconds. An actor. On a professional basketball court. With guys who jump 3 feet off the ground. This dude jumps 6 inches, on a good day, with a running start and the wind at his back. But he's got guión destartalado and apparently, the technical motion of an actor and a pull-up jumper are "basically the same thing, give or take 90 degrees." That's what the coach said. The team doctor immediately requested a cognitive evaluation for the coach. Budget: unlimited. Well technically there's a limit, but the owner decided to ignore it. We're in repeater tax territory, where every extra dollar of payroll costs FIVE dollars in penalties. The front office sweats with every new contract, the accountant has quit three times this year, but the owner keeps signing checks. The result? An absolute dream roster, the kind of team you build in NBA 2K when you turn on cheat mode. The downside? Zero flexibility. No first-round Draft picks, no free agent signings, no wiggle room whatsoever. It's all or nothing. And tonight, it's gonna be all.
Jornada 1 — vs Detroit Engine-Roar
98-122 (D)
Cooper Flagg, this next-level player, draws first blood! A free throw to start!
Tyrese Haliburton, this respected competitor, sends the basketball wide! The touch is off tonight!
Stephen Curry coughs up the Spalding! Occasional mental lapses strikes again back to the basket!
Anthony Edwards falls asleep on the weak side! Hot head exposed!
Khalil Everage, this do-it-all player, takes over from mid-range. A layup! That's elite!
Break! Cooper Flagg heads straight to the bathroom moment he hits the locker room. Did you know Cooper Flagg started basketball because he was terrible at soccer? Sometimes failure leads to greatness. Resumption imminent. The players wrap up their express warm-up.
This player on the come-up Tyrese Haliburton can't believe the call! Arguing with the ref!
Cooper Flagg posts up the rock into nothing! Defense that's basically a suggestion on full display tonight!
Tyrese Haliburton reads the defense perfectly! A gym-rat work ethic and a sky-high basketball IQ!
Khalil Everage misses the rotation! Too tired, like an actor too tired for the el héroe trágico!
Stephen Curry, this combo guard, hangs the head. Tough loss despite unreal swagger effort.
Khalil Everage takes a sip of water and spits it right back out. Anthony Edwards doesn't drink. Throat too tight. Confession: I nearly fell asleep during the second quarter. The third woke me right up. Good night everyone! And now, the show nobody asked for: 'Pigeon Hunters.'
Jornada 2 — vs Miami Heart-Attack
106-89 (V)
And we're underway! Tyrese Haliburton touches the pill first! This guy with a proven track record looks eager!
Anthony Edwards converts a tough floater on the low block! Skill level: elite!
This league veteran Anthony Edwards reads the play and intercepts! Brilliant anticipation!
This diamond in the rough Khalil Everage creates for others! Unselfish play with next-level basketball IQ!
Stephen Curry explodes to the weak side! This All-Star caliber talent exploiting the rotation!
The players disappear. Khalil Everage has a makeshift neck brace out of a towel. Rumor has it Khalil Everage has been wearing the same lucky underwear for three seasons. The medical staff is concerned. Tipoff! The ref blows the whistle, the ball is in the air.
Tyrese Haliburton answers back with a buzzer beater! Eyes in the back of the head under pressure!
Tyrese Haliburton, this oversized freak, commands a crowd fully behind them! The arena belongs to this league veteran!
This who-is-this-guy player Khalil Everage swings the basketball around! Insane court vision ball movement!
Tonight, Khalil Everage isn't just an actor, they're a phenomenon with the guión destartalado!
Tyrese Haliburton pumps the fist as the buzzer goes! This solid pro savors the win!
Khalil Everage throws chalk powder like LeBron. Tyrese Haliburton coughs for two minutes straight. On my end, I ate a hot dog so disgusting I'd classify it as a traumatic experience. That's it. Up next: 'Anthony Bourdain Visits: The Park-and-Ride in Poughkeepsie.' Culture shock.
Jornada 3 — vs Orlando Magic-Beans
96-114 (D)
This world-class player Stephen Curry opens the scoring! An and-one! Early advantage!
Tyrese Haliburton, this colossus, bobbles the leather and the chance evaporates from downtown!
This guy with a proven track record Tyrese Haliburton commits the 5-second violation! Clock management shaky emotions under pressure!
Stephen Curry gets caught flat-footed! This bonafide star beaten to the spot!
Khalil Everage, this unknown gem, knifes through for a bank shot from downtown! Wow!
Halftime! Cooper Flagg has the hardwood pattern imprinted on his elbow. Did you know Cooper Flagg started basketball because he was terrible at soccer? Sometimes failure leads to greatness. We're back! The coach drew stuff on the whiteboard, let's see if it works.
Stephen Curry steps back the towel! This guy everybody knows showing injury-prone body!
Anthony Edwards with a rough bucket at the top of the key! Hot head at the worst time!
Cooper Flagg blows past the ball out of the trap! Eyes in the back of the head under pressure!
Khalil Everage misses from fatigue! This player nobody saw coming can't get the elevation from mid-range!
Anthony Edwards had the chances but couldn't convert. This well-respected player left wanting.
Stephen Curry's face is locked shut, zero emotion. Khalil Everage hides his eyes under a towel. On my end, I ate peanuts through the entire third quarter. Salt is my drug of choice. Good night! Up next: 'America's Got Talent: Mouth Noises Edition.' The judges are baffled.
Jornada 4 — vs Philadelphia Injury-Report
110-83 (V)
This legit talent Anthony Edwards in the starting lineup! Let's see what this legit talent brings!
Anthony Edwards, this respected competitor, threads the needle for a scoop layup at half court!
This established player Cooper Flagg anchors the defense from way beyond the arc! Nothing gets through!
Cooper Flagg takes off into the lane and kicks out! Ridiculous creativity and great decision-making!
Cooper Flagg, this oversized freak, posts up the smaller defender! Mismatch hunting!
Both teams head in. Stephen Curry has a red mark on his cheek from an elbow. Fun fact: Stephen Curry failed the driving test three times. On the court it's a different story, thankfully. The arena lights up, the players are back. Game on.
Khalil Everage knocks it down! Solid as an actor with the guión destartalado in hand!
A boiling cauldron fills the arena! This max-contract guy Stephen Curry feeds off the energy!
Tyrese Haliburton finds the open teammate! This up-and-coming baller making everyone better!
This world-class player Stephen Curry with a performance for the ages! A moment of pure grace chapter!
That's the game! Stephen Curry finishes with a monster performance! This jersey-selling name victorious!
Anthony Edwards slides across the court in his socks while Cooper Flagg splashes water on everyone. I tried taking notes during the game. My notebook is full of incomprehensible scribbles. We're out! And now, 'House Hunters: Broom Closet Edition.' Cozy open concept.
Jornada 5 — vs Phoenix No-Defense
102-94 (V)
Khalil Everage sets the tone early! The actor came to play tonight!
This guy with a proven track record Tyrese Haliburton with a cold-blooded scoop layup! No conscience!
Anthony Edwards times it perfectly and rejects the shot! A defensive rebound off the pick and roll!
Cooper Flagg threads the needle! Beautiful assist from mid-range! Unreal court vision!
Tyrese Haliburton, this solid pro, orchestrates the delay game! Freakish explosiveness in action!
Break. Cooper Flagg collapses on the locker room floor, arms spread wide. Fun fact: Cooper Flagg is unbeatable at arm wrestling in the locker room. Even the center is scared. We're back at it. The crowd had time to reload at the snack bar.
This seasoned vet Anthony Edwards punishes the defense with a deep three at the top of the key!
Tyrese Haliburton lets fly in front of the home faithful! A Playoff atmosphere! Beautiful!
Khalil Everage puts ego aside! The team comes first for this raw talent!
Stephen Curry is inevitable tonight! This guy everybody knows can't be stopped!
Stephen Curry, this combo guard, takes the final bow! A team high-five! Dominant display!
Khalil Everage pretends to faint from happiness. Anthony Edwards pretends to call 911. I spent my evening screaming into a microphone, and honestly, I'd do it all over again. See you at the next game. In the meantime: 'MasterClass: How to Fold a Fitted Sheet.' Gripping television.
Jornada 6 — vs Los Angeles Nursing-Home
124-91 (V)
Game time! Stephen Curry and this world-class player ready to put on a show at the palace of hoops!
Tyrese Haliburton with the tough hook shot through contact! This legit talent won't be denied!
Khalil Everage, this versatile guy, finds the rolling big man! A deep three off the assist!
Khalil Everage, this all-around player, elevates for a monster pull-up jumper!
Stephen Curry blocks it and keeps it in play! Heads-up play, what awareness!
Heading in. Cooper Flagg's eyes are bloodshot from sheer effort. Did you know Cooper Flagg entered the dunk contest... At 5'9"? Courage knows no height. We're back at it. The crowd had time to reload at the snack bar.
Khalil Everage, this combo guard, uses strength and skill for a euro-step! Complete player!
Tyrese Haliburton drives to yet another easy bucket! The floodgates opened!
This guy everybody knows Stephen Curry passes to the opponent! Gift exchange driving to the hoop!
Stephen Curry lets fly and celebrates! A slide across the hardwood under the basket! The crowd erupts!
This league veteran Cooper Flagg secures the win with nerves of steel! Another one in the bag!
Khalil Everage and Stephen Curry freestyle a victory rap. Cooper Flagg does the beatbox. It's terrible but magnificent. Confession: I nearly fell asleep during the second quarter. The third woke me right up. Thanks for watching this game. And now: 'Deal or No Deal: Office Fridge Edition.'
Jornada 7 — vs Toronto Border-Patrol
97-122 (D)
This dude out of nowhere Khalil Everage comes out aggressive! Opens with a bank shot at half court!
Anthony Edwards posts up but overcooks it! Hot head showing up again!
Tyrese Haliburton launches into a trap! Sometimes predictable game when reading the defense!
Tyrese Haliburton lunges the wrong direction! Fake had this respected competitor fooled!
Anthony Edwards, this next-level player, with the exclamation-point devastating dunk! Game changer!
Break. Cooper Flagg collapses on the locker room floor, arms spread wide. Fun fact: Cooper Flagg got rejected at a casting for a deodorant commercial. The irony. Back on the court. The coach changed the starting five, that'll be a surprise.
Tyrese Haliburton, this towering presence, throws the hands up! Exasperated from the left corner!
A catch-and-shoot triple from Cooper Flagg catches the back rim and pops out! So close!
This hooper's hooper Tyrese Haliburton calls the audible! Changed the play and it works!
Cooper Flagg short-arms the shot from fatigue! This legit talent has nothing left!
Khalil Everage penetrates past the media. This hungry young player not in the mood to talk.
Khalil Everage is the last one off the court, shoulders hunched. Stephen Curry waits at the tunnel entrance. I spent this game nervously chewing gum. I'm on my seventh piece. That's all! Coming up: 'Hotel Hell: Airbnb With No Lock Edition.' Chills guaranteed.
Jornada 8 — vs Minnesota Ice-Wall
95-105 (D)
Tip-off! Stephen Curry gets us started! Let's go!
Tyrese Haliburton, this next-level player, with a contested thunderous slam that misses under the basket!
Khalil Everage botches the handoff! Even the guión destartalado exchanges go smoother!
Stephen Curry, this solid build, loses the assignment! Easy bucket over tendency to force bad shots!
A free throw! Anthony Edwards cannot be stopped tonight! This guy with a proven track record is locked in!
Rest. Cooper Flagg buries his head in a wet towel and doesn't move. They say Cooper Flagg has a ritual where he touches the basket post three times. If someone watches, starts over. The locker room empties, the court fills up. Act 2.
This bonafide star Stephen Curry slaps the floor in anger! The frustration is palpable!
Anthony Edwards launches but it's well off! Limited stamina under fatigue!
Stephen Curry makes the hockey pass! Scary good handles finding the extra pass!
This player on the come-up Tyrese Haliburton can't close out! The legs are shot at the top of the key!
Anthony Edwards walks off in silence. This league veteran gave it all but it wasn't enough.
Stephen Curry closes his eyes walking out. Cooper Flagg keeps his wide open, fixed, empty. Did you know that Cooper Flagg practices actor on Tuesdays? Builds character, that does. Good night! Up next: 'My 600-Lb Neighbor: He Makes Noise at 3 AM.' Shocking testimonies.
Jornada 9 — vs Houston Blast-Off
112-110 (V)
Tyrese Haliburton, this tower, takes the court! The hostile crowd is electric!
This seasoned vet Tyrese Haliburton disrupts the play with a timely commanding rebound!
Anthony Edwards, this mountain of a man, wastes a golden chance with a wild catch-and-shoot triple!
Anthony Edwards, this colossus, muscles in for a scoop layup! Pure power!
This player making noise Anthony Edwards sets the back screen! A gym-rat work ethic off-ball contribution!
Rest. Tyrese Haliburton buries his head in a wet towel and doesn't move. Staff confession: Tyrese Haliburton is afraid of pigeons. Not 7-foot centers, no. Pigeons. Back for seconds. The court is shining, and so are the players.
This well-respected player Tyrese Haliburton converts the free throws under pressure! That dawg mentality under pressure!
Anthony Edwards shuts the door from the left corner! That's how you play defense!
The arena is electric! This guy with a proven track record Anthony Edwards thriving in a packed arena!
This up-and-coming baller Cooper Flagg converts the and-one in late in the quarter! Three-point play!
Khalil Everage is named player of the game! The actor is also the star!
Tyrese Haliburton and Khalil Everage form a tunnel for Cooper Flagg to crawl through. Too tall. Gets stuck. Evening confession: I'm wearing Tyrese Haliburton's jersey under my shirt. For morale. We're packing up. Time for the late-night feature: 'Unsolved Mysteries: Where Is My Left Sock.'
Jornada 10 — vs Denver Horse-Track
90-123 (D)
Cooper Flagg, this next-level player, embraces the cathedral silence! Game on!
Tyrese Haliburton, this giant, draws the foul but can't capitalize! Tendency to rush!
Anthony Edwards charges right into the defender! Turnover! Heavy feet when controlling pace!
Cooper Flagg bites on the pump fake! This respected competitor sent flying facing the rim!
Stephen Curry picks up the second technical! This jersey-selling name ejected! Tendency to force bad shots!
Break! Khalil Everage has left a puddle of sweat at every step through the tunnel. Did you know? Khalil Everage once signed an autograph for a referee. During the game. Mid free-throw. Break's over, time for basketball. Let's go.
Stephen Curry takes a tough free throw and it doesn't go! Hot head in shot selection!
Cooper Flagg drives a step slower than usual! Occasional mental lapses in the tank!
Stephen Curry, this do-it-all player, gets the ball poked away! Sometimes predictable game when protecting the damn ball!
Stephen Curry, this certified bucket, with the frustrated foul! Occasional mental lapses in tough moments!
Stephen Curry reflects on what could have been. Lack of consistency the difference tonight.
Cooper Flagg stands alone at center court as the lights go dim. Anthony Edwards comes back to get him. Tonight my voice traveled three octaves. Baritone to soprano. Basketball does that to you. Thanks for the game! And now, tonight's feature film: 'Fast and Furious 47: The Quest for a Parking Spot.'
Jornada 11 — vs New York Over-Timers
88-105 (D)
This guy everybody knows Stephen Curry catches the rock early and goes to work! Opening salvo!
Anthony Edwards forces a sky hook driving to the hoop! This player on the come-up trying too hard!
Anthony Edwards with the backcourt violation! This player on the come-up under too much pressure!
This established player Anthony Edwards commits the and-one foul! Defense that's basically a suggestion in positioning!
Cooper Flagg scores at will! A double-clutch layup from the left corner! This league veteran domination!
Halftime! Khalil Everage walks barefoot on the cold tunnel tiles. Did you know? Khalil Everage tried to become a rapper before basketball. The world dodged a bullet. The buzzer calls the players. Time for the show, act II.
This respected competitor Cooper Flagg stares at the ref! That look could freeze water!
Anthony Edwards, this solid pro, with the shot-clock heave! No good from the right corner!
Cooper Flagg pushes the pace in transition! That dawg mentality showing in every play!
Khalil Everage, this do-it-all player, laboring up and down! Hot head draining the energy!
Tyrese Haliburton, this solid pro, will be back stronger. This defeat fuels the fire.
Stephen Curry turns back to look at the court one last time. Cooper Flagg doesn't turn around. I spent this game nervously chewing gum. I'm on my seventh piece. We're packing up. Time for the late-night feature: 'Unsolved Mysteries: Where Is My Left Sock.'
Jornada 12 — vs Cleveland Twin-Towers
86-107 (D)
This legit talent Cooper Flagg means business! Fast start along the baseline!
Anthony Edwards drives the Spalding into the front rim! That's frustrating for this respected competitor!
This name that's buzzing Anthony Edwards with turnover number points! Injury-prone body is piling up!
Stephen Curry turns the head and loses the man! This All-Star caliber talent napping defensively!
Tyrese Haliburton, this well-respected player, drills another finger roll back to the basket! Automatic!
Cut! Halftime. Stephen Curry's jersey is completely drenched in sweat. Intel: Stephen Curry asked Cleveland Twin-Towers for their energy drink recipe. They refused. Back for the second half. The coach slammed his fist on the table.
Anthony Edwards, this mammoth, waves off the play call! Ego the size of Texas hurting the team!
Tyrese Haliburton fires away but the shot rims out! Lack of consistency rears its ugly head!
This seasoned vet Tyrese Haliburton runs the pick-and-pop to perfection! Tactical mastery!
This respected competitor Cooper Flagg signals to the bench! Needs a blow! Ego the size of Texas!
Anthony Edwards lets fly to the tunnel in disappointment. This well-respected player will learn from this.
Tyrese Haliburton mutters while walking out. Stephen Curry watches from the corner of his eye, worried. I spent the evening looking for a stat that couldn't be found. It didn't exist. I made one up. Good evening! Now: 'Destination Unknown: The Roundabout in Scranton, PA.' Total adventure.
Jornada 13 — vs Boston Ring-Chasers
81-121 (D)
Anthony Edwards takes the floor with that look in his eyes! He came to play tonight!
Khalil Everage misses! Even an actor can't fix that shot!
Khalil Everage with the careless pass! Encarnarring the el héroe trágico with more care, please!
Tyrese Haliburton loses the screen battle! Limited stamina around the picks!
Khalil Everage can't mask the disappointment! This hidden prospect wearing it on the sleeve!
Halftime whistle. Anthony Edwards flops into the first available chair. Juicy anecdote: Anthony Edwards was caught dancing the Macarena in the showers. Alone. Back at it! The players jog toward center court.
This legit talent Anthony Edwards throws up a prayer at the top of the key! Not answered!
This established star Stephen Curry calls for a sub! Can't go anymore! Defense that's basically a suggestion taking its toll!
Cooper Flagg throws it away! Occasional mental lapses under pressure at half court!
This respected competitor Anthony Edwards hangs the head after the miss! Deflated back to the basket!
This player making noise Anthony Edwards shakes hands and moves on. In the end, limited stamina proved costly.
Cooper Flagg walks head down toward the tunnel. Anthony Edwards drags his feet behind, shoulders slumped. Behind the scenes, the cameraman told me I was making faces during free throws. I had no idea. That was beautiful. And now: 'House Hunters International: 90-Square-Foot Studio, Wall View.' A steal.
Jornada 14 — vs San Antonio Skyscrapers
85-130 (D)
Tyrese Haliburton opens with a tear drop! This next-level player making an early statement!
Khalil Everage misses the bunny! An actor dropping the el héroe trágico from point-blank!
This certified bucket Stephen Curry gets pickpocketed under the basket! Sloppy handling!
Khalil Everage gets back-doored! Didn't see it, like not seeing the el héroe trágico behind the guión destartalado!
Cooper Flagg slams the damn ball in frustration! Sometimes predictable game on full display!
Halftime. The physio pounces on Anthony Edwards to massage his thighs. Intel: Anthony Edwards asked San Antonio Skyscrapers for their energy drink recipe. They refused. Both teams retake the floor. The best may be yet to come.
Cooper Flagg rushes an and-one at the top of the key! Tendency to force bad shots creeping in!
Khalil Everage cramps up! Muscles tight from the guión destartalado and the ball double duty!
Khalil Everage dispossessed! Couldn't hold on, not the actor's finest moment!
Tyrese Haliburton, this titan, pounds the scorer's table! Hot head on full display!
Khalil Everage shakes hands through the pain! An actor who respects the guión destartalado and the game!
Anthony Edwards leaves the court at a jog. Tyrese Haliburton stays there, planted at center court, motionless. I spent this entire evening standing because my chair has been broken for three games. Nobody fixes it. We're done here. Up next: 'Top Chef: Microwave Edition.' Bon appetit.
Jornada 15 — vs Oklahoma City Treasure-Chest
80-125 (D)
This league veteran Anthony Edwards gets the crowd going early! The energy is building!
Khalil Everage, this swiss-army-knife type, double-clutches and misses! Indecision from this dark horse!
Tyrese Haliburton with the lazy pass! Occasional mental lapses leading to easy points!
Khalil Everage can't contain the drive! Encarnarring the el héroe trágico is more containable!
Khalil Everage pounds the scorer's table! Frustrated! The actor in them is showing!
End of the second quarter. Khalil Everage is breathing so loud you can hear it from here. Anecdote: Khalil Everage once shot at the wrong basket during warm-ups. Nobody has forgotten. Play resumes! The coach set a few things straight in the locker room.
Stephen Curry posts up the pill right into the defender's hands! Defense that's basically a suggestion!
This bonafide star Stephen Curry is a warrior but the body says no! The four quarters of war!
Anthony Edwards loses the pill in traffic! This player on the come-up can't afford that!
Khalil Everage glares at the orange! Like it personally betrayed this actor!
Anthony Edwards, this 7-footer, trudges off the court. Lessons to take from this one.
Khalil Everage sits on the bench, staring into nothing. Tyrese Haliburton has his head in his hands. On my end, I ate peanuts through the entire third quarter. Salt is my drug of choice. Thanks for being here. Coming up: 'Forbidden Zone: Behind the Scenes of a Vending Machine.'
My Team ends the season #10 with a 5W-10L record. Season MVP: Tyrese Haliburton.
Diario de la temporada
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