Meine Traum-Starting-Five â basketball_team đ©đȘ
5 Mitglieder · TeamBranch
Saisontagebuch
Tabelle
| # | Team | S | N | Pts |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | Detroit Engine-Roar | 14 | 1 | 28 |
| 2 | Oklahoma City Treasure-Chest | 12 | 3 | 24 |
| 3 | San Antonio Skyscrapers | 12 | 3 | 24 |
| 4 | Cleveland Twin-Towers | 11 | 4 | 22 |
| 5 | Denver Horse-Track | 11 | 4 | 22 |
| 6 | Boston Ring-Chasers | 10 | 5 | 20 |
| 7 | Houston Blast-Off | 8 | 7 | 16 |
| 8 | Toronto Border-Patrol | 8 | 7 | 16 |
| 9 | New York Over-Timers | 7 | 8 | 14 |
| 10 | Minnesota Ice-Wall | 6 | 9 | 12 |
| 11 | My Team | 6 | 9 | 12 |
| 12 | Los Angeles Nursing-Home | 5 | 10 | 10 |
| 13 | Miami Heart-Attack | 4 | 11 | 8 |
| 14 | Phoenix No-Defense | 2 | 13 | 4 |
| 15 | Orlando Magic-Beans | 2 | 13 | 4 |
| 16 | Philadelphia Injury-Report | 2 | 13 | 4 |
Vorsaison
Buckle up, pull your visor down, and clench everything you've got because tonight we are NOT talking about some pickup game at the park. Hell no. We're talking about an arena shaking so hard the neighbors called the cops three times before tip-off. We're talking about a franchise built on decades of sweat, tears, heart-stopping buzzer-beaters, and Draft picks so bold that half the league thought they'd lost their minds. And yet, here they are, back and hungrier than ever. The team with no name, baby! Listen, I've watched hundreds of players come and go in my broadcasting career, but LeBron James is something else entirely. He's the kind of player who makes you jump out of your chair and scream "OH SHIT" at your TV without even realizing it. Standing at 206 cm, a wingspan like a pterodactyl, and a killer instinct that even the coaches can't explain. This man feels the game. He knows where the ball is going to land before the shot even leaves the hand. He reads passes like he's reading minds. At this level, it's not basketball anymore, it's straight-up sorcery. The scary thing is that the more pressure rises, the more he rises with it. Fourth quarter, down by three, the opposing coach screaming, the crowd roaring... And he just shrugs, takes the ball, and nails a step-back three over three defenders draped all over him like it's a Tuesday morning shootaround drill. This is the kind of player you don't just build a team around, you build an era around him. And tonight, that era begins. And because this season couldn't possibly be normal, the coach went out and signed Cristiano Ronaldo. The man. Is. A fuĂballspieler. I'm going to let that marinate for two seconds. A fuĂballspieler. On a professional basketball court. With guys who jump 3 feet off the ground. This dude jumps 6 inches, on a good day, with a running start and the wind at his back. But he's got ihre FuĂballschuhe and apparently, the technical motion of a fuĂballspieler and a pull-up jumper are "basically the same thing, give or take 90 degrees." That's what the coach said. The team doctor immediately requested a cognitive evaluation for the coach. Financially, this team is operating in another dimension. The salary cap? Never heard of it. The luxury tax? Paid with a smile. The owner sold two of his yachts to fund this roster and he'd do it again tomorrow morning. Every player on this bench earns more in a week than most people do in a year, and not a single one of them is here to ride the pine. This is a team built to win NOW. Not tomorrow, not next season. Tonight.
Spieltag 1 â vs Detroit Engine-Roar
81-116 (N)
This potential GOAT Kobe Bryant comes out aggressive! Opens with a two-handed slam from mid-range!
Kobe Bryant, this absolute unit, gets stuffed trying a buzzer-beater! Denied!
This well-respected player Bronny James dribbles off the foot! Unforced error!
This all-time great LeBron James fouls reaching in! Tendency to rush on defense!
Bronny James, this smooth operator, throws the hands up! Exasperated in transition!
Break! LeBron James has left a puddle of sweat at every step through the tunnel. I've been told LeBron James once ordered a pizza during a timeout. The coach was not amused. The buzzer calls the players. Time for the show, act II.
Kobe Bryant drives the leather into the front rim! That's frustrating for this franchise cornerstone!
LeBron James is running on pure willpower! This certified GOAT candidate refusing to quit!
LeBron James posts up the damn ball right to the defense! Costly mistake by this potential GOAT!
Bronny James, this swiss-army-knife type, pounds the scorer's table! Tendency to rush on full display!
Bronny James, this legit talent, takes the loss hard. Sometimes predictable game at the wrong moments.
Kobe Bryant avoids the cameras like the plague. LeBron James gets caught. Just says 'we'll be better'. Evening confession: I'm wearing Kobe Bryant's jersey under my shirt. For morale. Good evening! Up next: 'Fixer Upper: Renovating a Studio on a Twelve-Dollar Budget.' Challenge accepted.
Spieltag 2 â vs Miami Heart-Attack
108-105 (S)
Cristiano Ronaldo stretches center court! Loosening up, the fuĂballspieler is getting ready!
LeBron James rotates perfectly for the rebound in traffic! That dawg mentality on full display!
Bronny James lets fly the basketball into nothing! Tendency to force bad shots on full display tonight!
The technical flair of Cristiano Ronaldo recalls their fuĂballspieler days. A buzzer-beater! Sublime!
This potential GOAT Kobe Bryant adjusts at halftime and comes out sharp! Adaptation!
Break. LeBron James collapses next to the vending machine. Fun fact: LeBron James blocked a shot in the finals... And dislocated a thumb celebrating. Classic. Back on the court. The crowd greets them with a standing ovation.
Cristiano Ronaldo blocks the potential winner! A fuĂballspieler blocking the das Siegestor from disaster!
Cristiano Ronaldo contests every shot! Relentless as a fuĂballspieler with the das Siegestor!
The press box buzzes about Cristiano Ronaldo! A fuĂballspieler with the ihre FuĂballschuhe making headlines!
Kobe Bryant, this giant, with the late-game layup! An unmatched feel for the game shining through!
This global icon Cristiano Ronaldo seals the deal! Victory with night-in night-out consistency!
Kobe Bryant grabs the arena mic and screams. Just a scream. Cristiano Ronaldo applauds. I got a text from Kobe Bryant after the game. Just kidding. Nobody texts me. Good evening! Now: 'Destination Unknown: The Roundabout in Scranton, PA.' Total adventure.
Spieltag 3 â vs Orlando Magic-Beans
126-95 (S)
Cristiano Ronaldo steps back into position! This generational talent not wasting any time!
A thunderous slam by Kobe Bryant from mid-range! Eyes in the back of the head in every fiber!
Cristiano Ronaldo locks down their opponent! Tight as a fuĂballspieler gripping the ihre FuĂballschuhe!
LeBron James reads the defense like a book! Assist driving to the hoop! Night-in night-out consistency!
This player making noise Bronny James uses the floater over this versatile guy coverage! Smart!
Halftime. LeBron James throws his towel on the floor walking in. True story: LeBron James walked into the wrong locker room during his first game against Orlando Magic-Beans. Awkward. Back at it! The coach said two words. Two words that were enough.
Cristiano Ronaldo adds to the total! A fuĂballspieler who always exceeds expectations!
Standing ovation for Cristiano Ronaldo! The palace of hoops salutes the fuĂballspieler and their ihre FuĂballschuhe!
Bronny James, this solid pro, rotates on defense! An off-the-charts basketball IQ team commitment!
The story of Cristiano Ronaldo: a fuĂballspieler by morning, a baller by night. The das Siegestor would be proud!
Kobe Bryant, this absolute legend, embraces the teammates! A raised fist! Sweet victory!
LeBron James and Kobe Bryant do the conga. Alone. On an empty court. Nobody joins in. Confession: I nearly fell asleep during the second quarter. The third woke me right up. That's it for tonight. Coming up: 'True Confessions: I Put Ketchup on Pasta.'
Spieltag 4 â vs Philadelphia Injury-Report
106-99 (S)
LeBron James, this giant, sets the tone immediately! Natural-born leadership from the jump!
Bronny James, this versatile guy, dominates in transition and puts up a pull-up jumper! Unstoppable!
Cristiano Ronaldo closes out perfectly! Precise as erzielenning the das Siegestor!
This global icon LeBron James leads the fast break and dishes! Easy bucket off the assist!
Cristiano Ronaldo creates the switch! Smooth adjustment, fuĂballspieler-level thinking!
Well-deserved break. LeBron James looks like someone who just ran a marathon. Anecdote of the day: LeBron James forgot his shorts on the last road trip. Played in borrowed shorts two sizes too big. There they are. The coach must have found the right words.
Bronny James penetrates and fires a half-court heave! This all-around player lighting it up!
This respected competitor Bronny James gets the crowd into it! A Finals-like atmosphere at fever pitch!
LeBron James brings energy off the bench! This all-time great infectious enthusiasm!
This global icon LeBron James turns adversity into fuel! A play that goes down in history energy!
Cristiano Ronaldo salutes the fans! A fuĂballspieler's farewell until the next das Siegestor!
Kobe Bryant and LeBron James leap onto each other like kids. LeBron James comes sprinting in and crushes them both. My evening in summary: yell, drink coffee, yell again, spill the coffee, yell some more. We're packing up. Time for the late-night feature: 'Unsolved Mysteries: Where Is My Left Sock.'
Spieltag 5 â vs Phoenix No-Defense
114-108 (S)
This basketball god LeBron James gets the crowd going early! The energy is building!
LeBron James with the decisive two-handed slam! Unreal swagger when it matters most!
LeBron James a monster swat with authority! This oversized freak protecting the paint!
Cristiano Ronaldo with the behind-the-back pass! Flashier than the ihre FuĂballschuhe at work!
This absolute legend Cristiano Ronaldo sets the back screen! Unreal swagger off-ball contribution!
Time to breathe. LeBron James has both hands on both knees, completely cooked. Little scoop: LeBron James tried to bribe the DJ to play his song. The DJ agreed. Nobody liked it. Break's over, time for basketball. Let's go.
LeBron James, this beanpole, elevates for a monster thunderous slam!
This undisputed superstar Cristiano Ronaldo draws the MVP chants! The crowd is on their feet for the star!
This potential GOAT LeBron James celebrates the teammate's score! It's about the team!
Every fuĂballspieler in the crowd sees themselves in Cristiano Ronaldo's battle with the rock!
Kobe Bryant dribbles into the tunnel with the W! This living legend all smiles!
Kobe Bryant and LeBron James run circles around Bronny James who doesn't move. Zen. While you were watching the game, I was desperately searching for my pen. Still haven't found it. Good evening! Now: 'Destination Unknown: The Roundabout in Scranton, PA.' Total adventure.
Spieltag 6 â vs Los Angeles Nursing-Home
109-102 (S)
LeBron James, this 7-footer, announced to huge cheers! Wild stands!
LeBron James launches the rock beautifully for a fadeaway jumper! What touch!
LeBron James anticipates the cut and deflects the Wilson! This certified GOAT candidate reading minds!
Cristiano Ronaldo, this living legend, surveys and delivers! A killer instinct in the playmaking!
LeBron James, this oversized freak, positions perfectly for the offensive rebound! An unmatched feel for the game!
Back to the locker room. Kobe Bryant punches his locker. Confession: Kobe Bryant tried yoga. Lasted two sessions before declaring it a combat sport. Break's over, the players take their positions.
A finger roll! Bronny James cannot be stopped tonight! This seasoned vet is locked in!
A roaring arena fills the arena! This franchise cornerstone Cristiano Ronaldo feeds off the energy!
This once-in-a-lifetime player LeBron James swings the leather around! Iron discipline ball movement!
Kobe Bryant is inevitable tonight! This household name can't be stopped!
This hooper's hooper Bronny James thanks the fans! The crowd is on its feet! What a ride!
LeBron James and Bronny James do celebratory push-ups. Cristiano Ronaldo counts out loud. Definitely cheating. As for me, I powered through three coffees and a gas station sandwich. The glamorous life of sports journalism. Thanks for being here. Coming up: 'Forbidden Zone: Behind the Scenes of a Vending Machine.'
Spieltag 7 â vs Toronto Border-Patrol
94-105 (N)
Kobe Bryant, this hall-of-fame lock, wins the opening tip! Great start for the team!
Bronny James, this do-it-all player, bobbles the Spalding and the chance evaporates at half court!
Kobe Bryant, this titan, gets called for the carry! Sometimes predictable game in ball-handling!
LeBron James gambles for the steal and pays the price! Hot head!
Kobe Bryant, this beanpole, showcases silky smooth technique with a gorgeous two-handed slam!
Halftime whistle. Kobe Bryant has dried blood on his elbow but plays tough. Rumor has it Kobe Bryant does 100 push-ups before every game. Or 10. Depends who you ask. Back on the court. The coach changed the starting five, that'll be a surprise.
Bronny James mouths off and picks up a T! Limited stamina taking over!
Bronny James goes to work the orange right into the defender's hands! Injury-prone body!
LeBron James, this global icon, manages the clock beautifully in the first half!
Kobe Bryant, this 7-footer, is moving in slow motion! Tank is empty!
Cristiano Ronaldo gave it everything! Everything a fuĂballspieler has, left on the court!
Kobe Bryant takes a sip of water and spits it right back out. LeBron James doesn't drink. Throat too tight. I spent the evening standing up and sitting down every thirty seconds. My Fitbit is congratulating me. And now, a brand new episode of 'Desperately Seeking My Cat.' Good night, everyone.
Spieltag 8 â vs Minnesota Ice-Wall
104-96 (S)
LeBron James opens with a bucket! This potential GOAT making an early statement!
LeBron James, this household name, drops a deep three at the buzzer! Pure artistry!
This household name Kobe Bryant forces the air ball with pressure! Suffocating!
This household name LeBron James connects on the pick-and-roll! Assist for a catch-and-shoot triple!
Kobe Bryant fades away to the weak side! This guy with rings on every finger exploiting the rotation!
Break! Kobe Bryant takes his jersey off before even reaching the locker room. Rumor has it Kobe Bryant does 100 push-ups before every game. Or 10. Depends who you ask. Both teams emerge from the tunnel. The second half can begin.
Bronny James, this well-respected player, knifes through for a double-clutch layup in the paint! Wow!
You can cut the tension with a knife! Immense pressure as LeBron James steps up!
Cristiano Ronaldo runs the play to perfection! Perfection of erzielenning the das Siegestor!
Remember this moment! Bronny James is making history with a half-court heave!
Kobe Bryant can breathe! The win is secured, it's over!
LeBron James rips the net off the rim. Bronny James wraps it around his neck like a scarf. Yours truly held it together all evening without a bathroom break. That's professionalism. That's all for today. Up next: 'Dateline: The True Cost of a Cup of Yogurt.' Deep investigation.
Spieltag 9 â vs Houston Blast-Off
81-119 (N)
This franchise cornerstone Cristiano Ronaldo catches the ball early and goes to work! Opening salvo!
Bronny James misfires from under the basket! This league veteran searching for answers!
Cristiano Ronaldo trips up in the top of the key! A fuĂballspieler never trips at work... Right?
Cristiano Ronaldo gets screened out! Stuck behind the ihre FuĂballschuhe like it's a wall!
Cristiano Ronaldo kicks the air! The frustration of a fuĂballspieler who knows they can do better!
The players disappear into the tunnel. Cristiano Ronaldo asks for an ice pack. Did you know? Cristiano Ronaldo once signed an autograph for a referee. During the game. Mid free-throw. Come on, second half! The best is yet to come. Or the worst. Who knows.
LeBron James fires a reverse layup at the top of the key but can't connect! Lack of consistency showing!
This seasoned vet Bronny James stumbles! The fatigue is real after this ball game!
Cristiano Ronaldo, this all-around player, fumbles the entry pass under the basket!
This certified GOAT candidate Cristiano Ronaldo fouls hard out of frustration! Defense that's basically a suggestion showing!
Cristiano Ronaldo walks off in silence. This guy with rings on every finger gave it all but it wasn't enough.
LeBron James punches his locker when he gets to the locker room. LeBron James slides down the wall to the floor. I spent my evening screaming into a microphone, and honestly, I'd do it all over again. See you soon. Coming up: 'Extreme Couponing: Family of Eight at Walmart.' Double episode.
Spieltag 10 â vs Denver Horse-Track
95-104 (N)
This first-ballot legend LeBron James in the starting lineup! Let's see what this first-ballot legend brings!
LeBron James gets a clean look but tendency to rush costs the bucket!
This hooper's hooper Bronny James with turnover number buckets! Shaky emotions under pressure is piling up!
Cristiano Ronaldo lunges the wrong direction! Fake had this living legend fooled!
This all-time great Kobe Bryant goes to work under the basket! A floater drops beautifully!
The locker room. LeBron James sprawls out full-length on the bench. Intel: LeBron James asked Denver Horse-Track for their energy drink recipe. They refused. The show goes on. Players take position. Silence. Whistle.
LeBron James, this tower, waves off the play call! Lack of consistency hurting the team!
Kobe Bryant launches a buzzer beater and... Airball! Ego the size of Texas at its peak!
Bronny James, this swiss-army-knife type, sets a brick-wall screen! Silky smooth technique on full display!
Bronny James, this seasoned vet, is dragging! The this ball game minutes taking their toll!
Cristiano Ronaldo tells reporters: 'Tomorrow we erzielens better, like the das Siegestor!'
Bronny James rips off his headband and throws it on the ground. LeBron James picks up his own and folds it carefully. Confession: I nearly fell asleep during the second quarter. The third woke me right up. That's it for tonight. Coming up: 'True Confessions: I Put Ketchup on Pasta.'
Spieltag 11 â vs New York Over-Timers
82-120 (N)
Cristiano Ronaldo takes off with energy from the opening whistle! This absolute legend locked in!
This potential GOAT Cristiano Ronaldo whiffs on a sky hook! The crowd groans!
Bronny James, this all-around player, gets the ball poked away! Lack of consistency when protecting the rock!
LeBron James, this titan, gets dunked on from way beyond the arc! Poster material!
This undisputed superstar Kobe Bryant can't believe the call! Arguing with the ref!
Well-deserved break. LeBron James looks like someone who just ran a marathon. Rumor has it LeBron James has been wearing the same lucky underwear for three seasons. The medical staff is concerned. Act two! The bench players are fired up, the starters too.
Kobe Bryant forces a bad two-handed slam! This all-time great needs to trust teammates!
LeBron James is cramping up! This generational talent trying to shake it off! Ego the size of Texas!
Kobe Bryant, this tree of a man, telegraphs the pass! Intercepted from the left corner!
Kobe Bryant, this franchise cornerstone, barks at the teammate! Defense that's basically a suggestion taking over!
LeBron James reflects on what could have been. Tendency to rush the difference tonight.
Bronny James walks head down toward the tunnel. LeBron James drags his feet behind, shoulders slumped. Your commentator broke his personal screaming record tonight. My throat is not thanking me. That's all! Coming up: 'Hotel Hell: Airbnb With No Lock Edition.' Chills guaranteed.
Spieltag 12 â vs Cleveland Twin-Towers
89-120 (N)
And we're underway! Bronny James touches the Wilson first! This seasoned vet looks eager!
Cristiano Ronaldo launches and misses! The leather isn't the das Siegestor, and it shows!
Cristiano Ronaldo commits the live-ball turnover! The ihre FuĂballschuhe would be ashamed!
Bronny James, this do-it-all player, loses the assignment! Easy bucket over injury-prone body!
Cristiano Ronaldo, this solid build, overpowers for a tear drop! Size matters!
That's a cut. LeBron James stumbles slightly reaching the locker room. Did you know LeBron James knits to unwind? Made a scarf in Cleveland Twin-Towers's colors. By accident, obviously. The buzzer calls the players. Time for the show, act II.
Bronny James picks up the second technical! This dude putting the league on notice ejected! Tendency to force bad shots!
Kobe Bryant takes off but the shot rims out! Lack of consistency rears its ugly head!
This absolute legend LeBron James attacks the closeout! Driving past the over-eager defender!
Bronny James is gassed! This player on the come-up bent over at half court! Heavy feet catching up!
Bronny James, this versatile guy, hangs the head. Tough loss despite that dawg mentality effort.
Cristiano Ronaldo takes a sip of water and spits it right back out. LeBron James doesn't drink. Throat too tight. Tonight I chewed through two pens. The office supply budget is going to explode. Good evening! Coming up: 'Dancing with the Stars: My Cousin's Wedding Edition.' Open bar.
Spieltag 13 â vs Boston Ring-Chasers
92-101 (N)
This potential GOAT Kobe Bryant means business! Fast start back to the basket!
Kobe Bryant, this living legend, comes up empty! A half-court heave off target from the right corner!
LeBron James with the backcourt violation! This basketball god under too much pressure!
LeBron James reacts too late to rotate! Occasional mental lapses on the help side!
Kobe Bryant, this absolute unit, rises above and hammers a finger roll!
The players disappear into the tunnel. Bronny James asks for an ice pack. Small detail: Bronny James wears mismatched socks every game. Calls it a strategy. Play resumes. The DJ drops a beat to hype up the crowd.
LeBron James slams the pill in frustration! Lack of consistency on full display!
Cristiano Ronaldo fires and misses from the left corner. Should have stuck with the das Siegestor!
This guy with a proven track record Bronny James switches defensive assignments on the fly! A gym-rat work ethic!
This hall-of-fame lock LeBron James calls for a sub! Can't go anymore! Sometimes predictable game taking its toll!
Cristiano Ronaldo, this combo guard, trudges off the palace of hoops. Lessons to take from this one.
LeBron James's face is locked shut, zero emotion. Bronny James hides his eyes under a towel. I tried to take a selfie with the court in the background. My thumb is over the lens. Good night everyone! Coming up: 'Boot Camp: Supermarket Checkout Line Edition.' Discipline.
Spieltag 14 â vs San Antonio Skyscrapers
81-125 (N)
Bronny James takes the floor with that look in his eyes! He came to play tonight!
LeBron James goes to work the ball awkwardly! The touch just isn't there for this all-time great!
Kobe Bryant coughs up the rock! Limited stamina strikes again from mid-range!
Kobe Bryant falls asleep on the weak side! Sometimes predictable game exposed!
LeBron James drops the head after another miss! Tendency to force bad shots sapping the confidence!
The players file out. LeBron James exchanges a tense look with the coach. I've been told LeBron James always puts his left shoe on first. The one day he switched, gave up 40 points. Back at it! The coach said two words. Two words that were enough.
Kobe Bryant posts up but overcooks it! Tendency to rush showing up again!
This basketball god LeBron James can barely get up the court! Fatigue setting in!
LeBron James with the errant pass! This first-ballot legend needs to settle down!
Bronny James, this smooth operator, shows negative body language! Shaky emotions under pressure creeping in!
This franchise cornerstone LeBron James shakes hands and moves on. In the end, defense that's basically a suggestion proved costly.
Kobe Bryant pushes away the reporter's microphone with a gesture. LeBron James takes the interview and says 'not tonight'. I spent this entire evening standing because my chair has been broken for three games. Nobody fixes it. Good evening! Coming up: 'Dancing with the Stars: My Cousin's Wedding Edition.' Open bar.
Spieltag 15 â vs Oklahoma City Treasure-Chest
78-123 (N)
LeBron James goes to work onto the floor! The crowd roars for this once-in-a-lifetime player!
This household name LeBron James misses the mark! A pull-up jumper goes begging under the basket!
This basketball god Cristiano Ronaldo with a careless turnover! Gift-wrapped for the opponent!
LeBron James, this oversized freak, gets exploited in the switch! Heavy feet exposed in the mismatch!
This hooper's hooper Bronny James shakes the head in disbelief! Nothing going right!
Break! Bronny James grabs an ice bag and slaps it on his knee. Intel: Bronny James once called an imaginary timeout in the middle of a game. The ref actually hesitated. The tunnel spits the players out. The war resumes.
Kobe Bryant, this beanpole, double-clutches and misses! Indecision from this living legend!
LeBron James, this guy with rings on every finger, making mistakes from exhaustion! The body is failing!
Cristiano Ronaldo tries to be too fancy and loses the Wilson! Lack of consistency in the decision-making!
LeBron James, this first-ballot legend, refuses to high-five! Ego the size of Texas hurting the chemistry!
Bronny James shoots to the tunnel in disappointment. This player making noise will learn from this.
LeBron James takes a sip of water and spits it right back out. Kobe Bryant doesn't drink. Throat too tight. During the game, I got a text from my mom: 'Stop yelling, I can hear you from here.' She lives 120 miles away. Good night everyone! Coming up: 'Boot Camp: Supermarket Checkout Line Edition.' Discipline.
My Team finishes #11 (6W-9L). Better luck next season! MVP: LeBron James.
Saisonjournal
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