Unstoppable vegas — basketball_team 🇳🇿
5 members · TeamBranch
Season Journal
Standings
| # | Team | W | L | Pts |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | Detroit Engine-Roar | 14 | 1 | 28 |
| 2 | Oklahoma City Treasure-Chest | 14 | 1 | 28 |
| 3 | San Antonio Skyscrapers | 10 | 5 | 20 |
| 4 | Boston Ring-Chasers | 10 | 5 | 20 |
| 5 | New York Over-Timers | 10 | 5 | 20 |
| 6 | Cleveland Twin-Towers | 10 | 5 | 20 |
| 7 | Unstoppable vegas | 9 | 6 | 18 |
| 8 | Minnesota Ice-Wall | 8 | 7 | 16 |
| 9 | Denver Horse-Track | 7 | 8 | 14 |
| 10 | Toronto Border-Patrol | 6 | 9 | 12 |
| 11 | Houston Blast-Off | 5 | 10 | 10 |
| 12 | Los Angeles Nursing-Home | 4 | 11 | 8 |
| 13 | Phoenix No-Defense | 4 | 11 | 8 |
| 14 | Philadelphia Injury-Report | 3 | 12 | 6 |
| 15 | Orlando Magic-Beans | 3 | 12 | 6 |
| 16 | Miami Heart-Attack | 3 | 12 | 6 |
Pre-season
Get comfortable because tonight, we are about to witness something special. I can feel it. It's in the air, it's in the eyes, it's in the low rumble of 20,000 people who know they're about to live through a moment. The franchise about to step onto this court has seen it all, lived it all: legendary triple-doubles, buzzer-beating heartbreaks, 15-point fourth-quarter comebacks, and losses that shatter careers. But they're here, still and always, with that burning desire to tear everything apart. Ladies and gentlemen... Unstoppable vegas! Yeah sure, it's a team sport, we all agree on that. But when you've got Jayson Tatum on your roster, the word "team" basically means him plus four guys who pass him the ball. Standing at 203 cm, a first step more explosive than a rocket launch, and a fadeaway so silky that even the defenders applaud as they watch him score. Scouts had this dude flagged at 14. By 16, he was beating pros. Today? He's embarrassing them. But what truly terrifies opponents isn't his highlights, it's his head. Look into his eyes during crunch time. There's nothing there. No stress, no doubt, just a killer's stare that says "give me the ball and get the hell out of the way." Opposing coaches have tried double-teams, triple-teams, zone defense, trash talk, Hack-a-Shaq... Nothing works. The man is programmed for clutch moments. It's genetic, and there's not a damn thing anyone can do about it. The budget, let's talk about it. Or actually, let's not, because it'll make you dizzy. We're beyond the luxury tax, beyond the second apron, we're in a zone that even the league's tax accountants struggle to calculate. The owner burns cash like others burn firewood, and he doesn't bat an eye. Every season this team doesn't win the title is a financial scandal. The pressure is absolute, the talent is maximal, and the margin for error is zero. Welcome to the world of superteams, where failure isn't an option, it's a public humiliation.
Matchday 1 — vs Detroit Engine-Roar
86-131 (L)
Tip-off! Luguentz Dort gets us started! Let's go!
Derrick White forces up a double-clutch layup over the defense! Shaky emotions under pressure! Bad decision!
Luguentz Dort throws it into the stands! What was that from this player on the come-up!
Jayson Tatum reacts too late to rotate! Hot head on the help side!
Jayson Tatum mouths off and picks up a T! Limited stamina taking over!
Break. Luguentz Dort collapses next to the vending machine. I've been told Luguentz Dort once ordered a pizza during a timeout. The coach was not amused. Back at it! The players jog toward center court.
Payton Pritchard misfires from the left corner! This name that's buzzing searching for answers!
This name that's buzzing Jayson Tatum has heavy legs! The pace has been brutal!
This name that's buzzing Jayson Tatum with turnover number points! Shaky emotions under pressure is piling up!
Payton Pritchard storms to the bench! This player on the come-up is visibly upset!
Jayson Tatum reflects on what could have been. Tendency to force bad shots the difference tonight.
Jayson Tatum punches his locker when he gets to the locker room. Luguentz Dort slides down the wall to the floor. Final confession: I still don't know how to pronounce Jayson Tatum's name. Forgive me. We're out. Up next: 'Say Yes to the Dress: Budget Three Fifty, Theme: Elastic.' Good luck.
Matchday 2 — vs Miami Heart-Attack
116-91 (W)
Luguentz Dort, this league veteran, wins the opening tip! Great start for the team!
Payton Pritchard goes coast to coast for a step-back three! This solid pro is relentless!
Luguentz Dort with the help-side brilliant anticipation! This name that's buzzing always in position!
Jayson Tatum with the transition assist! This up-and-coming baller pushing the pace with pure God-given talent!
This legit talent Jayson Tatum switches defensive assignments on the fly! Next-level basketball IQ!
The locker room. Jayson Tatum sprawls out full-length on the bench. Anecdote: Jayson Tatum fell asleep on the bench during an exhibition game. Still got named MVP. The players emerge from the tunnel. Stern faces, clenched fists.
This name that's buzzing Payton Pritchard is automatic along the baseline! A free throw drops again!
You can feel a hostile crowd through the screen! Luguentz Dort in the spotlight!
Payton Pritchard attacks the pick-and-roll to perfection! Chemistry on display!
Dwight Powell dribbles like a player possessed! Silky smooth technique unleashed!
Dwight Powell, this next-level player, with the post-game interview smile! An off-the-charts basketball IQ all night!
Payton Pritchard moonwalks across the hardwood. Dwight Powell attempts the worm. One of them pulls it off. I spent the evening standing up and sitting down every thirty seconds. My Fitbit is congratulating me. Thanks for being here. Now put down the remote, it's time for 'Wheel of Misfortune.'
Matchday 3 — vs Orlando Magic-Beans
135-89 (W)
Payton Pritchard, this lightning-quick little man, sets the tone immediately! Scary good handles from the jump!
Dwight Powell, this league veteran, sinks an and-one with surgical precision under the basket!
Luguentz Dort dishes into the lane and kicks out! Insane court vision and great decision-making!
Jayson Tatum converts a tough reverse layup in the paint! Skill level: elite!
This solid pro Payton Pritchard comes up with a massive steal! Transition time!
Halftime whistle. Jayson Tatum spits into the trash can walking into the locker room. Rumor has it Jayson Tatum has been wearing the same lucky underwear for three seasons. The medical staff is concerned. The players step onto the hardwood once more. The second half starts now.
Jayson Tatum pulls up past the defense for a tear drop! Size advantage from this this colossus!
Payton Pritchard, this small but mighty player, caps off a dominant performance! That dawg mentality from start to finish!
Dwight Powell dunks and the headband falls apart! Wardrobe malfunction!
This name that's buzzing Derrick White waves goodbye to the opponent! A chest bump! Savage!
This guy with a proven track record Luguentz Dort thanks the fans! The crowd is on its feet! What a ride!
Luguentz Dort and Payton Pritchard cradle the game ball like a baby. Derrick White takes a photo. I spent my evening screaming into a microphone, and honestly, I'd do it all over again. See you at the next game. In the meantime: 'MasterClass: How to Fold a Fitted Sheet.' Gripping television.
Matchday 4 — vs Philadelphia Injury-Report
110-88 (W)
This legit talent Jayson Tatum comes out firing! A tear drop in the first minute!
Derrick White with an incredible alley-oop along the baseline! Standing ovation!
Jayson Tatum a double team with authority! This beanpole protecting the paint!
Dwight Powell with the touch pass! This dude putting the league on notice barely had the Spalding and found the man!
This established player Jayson Tatum adjusts at halftime and comes out sharp! Adaptation!
Halftime. Payton Pritchard's hair is completely soaked, like climbing out of a pool. Small detail: Payton Pritchard whistles the national anthem before every game. Off-key. Consistently off-key. The players are back. Some look fresh, others... Not so much.
Luguentz Dort, this hooper's hooper, drops a half-court heave from mid-range! Pure artistry!
This league veteran Luguentz Dort turns the hostile crowd into stunned silence!
Derrick White puts ego aside! The team comes first for this league veteran!
The legend of Derrick White grows! This league veteran adding another chapter facing the rim!
Luguentz Dort, this swiss-army-knife type, acknowledges the fans! An incredible energy! An ice-cold stare at the opposing bench!
Payton Pritchard takes Derrick White by the hand and they bow to the crowd like stage actors. As for me, I powered through three coffees and a gas station sandwich. The glamorous life of sports journalism. That's all! Coming up: 'Hotel Hell: Airbnb With No Lock Edition.' Chills guaranteed.
Matchday 5 — vs Phoenix No-Defense
105-86 (W)
And we're underway! Derrick White touches the Spalding first! This guy with a proven track record looks eager!
Luguentz Dort attacks at the top of the key and finishes with an and-one! Too good!
Derrick White deflects the pass and starts the break! This name that's buzzing defense to offense!
Luguentz Dort threads the needle! Beautiful assist from the right corner! Unreal court vision!
Dwight Powell posts up to the right spot! Pure God-given talent off-ball movement!
The players file out. Payton Pritchard exchanges a tense look with the coach. Intel: Payton Pritchard refuses to play if the ball isn't inflated to exactly 8 PSI. Not 7.9, not 8.1. Eight. The players are back on the court. Here we go again!
Payton Pritchard knocks down a hook shot on the low block! Ice in the veins!
Jayson Tatum, this long boy, commands a Playoff atmosphere! The arena belongs to this legit talent!
Payton Pritchard sacrifices the body taking the charge! This solid pro ultimate teammate!
This guy with a proven track record Dwight Powell is the heartbeat of this team! A flash of genius leadership!
Luguentz Dort, this combo guard, carries the team to victory! MVP-level performance!
Derrick White grabs Payton Pritchard and hoists him onto his shoulders. Dwight Powell tries to climb on too. It ends in a pile. During the third quarter, I spilled my soup. Yes, I had soup in the booth. Don't judge. Thanks everyone! And now: 'Keeping Up with the Kardashians: Season 312.' They will never stop.
Matchday 6 — vs Los Angeles Nursing-Home
99-96 (W)
Luguentz Dort posts up into position! This solid pro not wasting any time!
Jayson Tatum blocks it and keeps it in play! Heads-up play, what awareness!
Brick! Luguentz Dort misfires facing the rim! Sometimes predictable game at the worst time!
Derrick White converts in the paint! A buzzer-beater with trademark unreal swagger!
Luguentz Dort spaces the floor perfectly! Great read of the system!
Halftime. Jayson Tatum glances at his phone for two seconds and puts it back. True story: Jayson Tatum walked into the wrong locker room during his first game against Los Angeles Nursing-Home. Awkward. The players charge out of the tunnel. Smells like a comeback.
Derrick White delivers in the clutch! A pull-up jumper off the pick and roll! This guy with a proven track record is ice cold!
This next-level player Luguentz Dort forces the air ball with pressure! Suffocating!
Dwight Powell shoots and the noise is deafening! A boiling cauldron! Wow!
This player making noise Jayson Tatum demands the ball and delivers! On the decisive possession heroics!
Payton Pritchard dunks in triumph! The final buzzer sounds! That's a W!
Dwight Powell and Payton Pritchard form a tunnel for Jayson Tatum to crawl through. Too tall. Gets stuck. My evening in summary: yell, drink coffee, yell again, spill the coffee, yell some more. That's all for today. Up next: 'Dateline: The True Cost of a Cup of Yogurt.' Deep investigation.
Matchday 7 — vs Toronto Border-Patrol
115-107 (W)
This league veteran Luguentz Dort in the starting lineup! Let's see what this league veteran brings!
Luguentz Dort, this player on the come-up, threads the needle for a half-court heave in transition!
Payton Pritchard with a textbook defensive stance! That's how you do it!
This dude putting the league on notice Jayson Tatum with assist number buckets! Next-level basketball IQ on display!
Derrick White, this respected competitor, manipulates the defense with the eyes! Insane court vision!
First half is done. Payton Pritchard is chugging Gatorade like it's water. Fun fact: Payton Pritchard tried to patent a celebration after a three-pointer. The application was rejected. The players emerge from the tunnel. Stern faces, clenched fists.
Luguentz Dort posts up and fires a pull-up jumper! This tweener lighting it up!
Deafening noise! Payton Pritchard goes to work and the building shakes!
This hooper's hooper Payton Pritchard motivates the squad in the huddle! Natural leader!
Payton Pritchard goes to work through pain, through doubt! This league veteran transcending!
Luguentz Dort daps up the opponent! Respect from this respected competitor after the battle!
Dwight Powell runs to the coach and lifts the coach up. Not thrilled but smiles anyway. Yours truly survived this game without losing his voice. It was touch and go. And now, a brand new episode of 'Desperately Seeking My Cat.' Good night, everyone.
Matchday 8 — vs Minnesota Ice-Wall
108-96 (W)
Game time! Jayson Tatum and this league veteran ready to put on a show at the court!
Luguentz Dort fades away to the rack for a sky hook! Can't contain this do-it-all player!
Derrick White digs in defensively! A gym-rat work ethic when the team needs stops!
This respected competitor Dwight Powell turns the corner and finds the open man! Unselfish!
Jayson Tatum reads the defense perfectly! Nerves of steel and a sky-high basketball IQ!
Finally a breather. Luguentz Dort has calf cramps, the physio rushes over. Physio's confession: Luguentz Dort purrs when you massage his calves. Like a cat. A big cat. Alright, it's time. The second half waits for no one.
What a play by Jayson Tatum! An alley-oop from the left corner! This league veteran is cooking!
Luguentz Dort in a sold-out gym on fire! This established player has been waiting for this stage!
Dwight Powell brings energy off the bench! This hooper's hooper infectious enthusiasm!
This will be talked about for years! Payton Pritchard with a devastating dunk! Iconic!
Luguentz Dort, this dude putting the league on notice, embraces the teammates! A finger to the lips to hush the crowd! Sweet victory!
Jayson Tatum and Payton Pritchard pound their chests like gorillas. The coach pretends not to know them. During the timeout, I tried to do pull-ups on the edge of the broadcast booth. Zero. We're packing up. Time for the late-night feature: 'Unsolved Mysteries: Where Is My Left Sock.'
Matchday 9 — vs Houston Blast-Off
124-97 (W)
This established player Dwight Powell comes out aggressive! Opens with a buzzer beater at half court!
Dwight Powell, this walking skyscraper, carves up the defense for a scoop layup! Beautiful!
This league veteran Derrick White takes the charge facing the rim! Gutsy play!
Payton Pritchard with the skip pass! Assist leads to an open tear drop!
Luguentz Dort, this player on the come-up, manages the clock beautifully in crunch time!
Break! Luguentz Dort takes his jersey off before even reaching the locker room. Fun fact: Luguentz Dort blocked a shot in the finals... And dislocated a thumb celebrating. Classic. Here they come. Fresh as daisies. Or not. We'll find out soon enough.
A pull-up jumper from downtown by Jayson Tatum! This mountain of a man with the long range!
The crowd is on its feet! A sold-out gym on fire as Dwight Powell takes the court!
Luguentz Dort, this player making noise, runs the play exactly as drawn! Execution!
Jayson Tatum is writing the story tonight! This hooper's hooper with a layup on the low block!
That's the game! Dwight Powell finishes with a monster performance! This guy with a proven track record victorious!
Luguentz Dort gives his headband to a kid in the crowd. Jayson Tatum gives his shoes. Dwight Powell gives his water bottle. The kid is overwhelmed. Fun fact: my driver has been waiting in the parking lot for an hour. He's sent me 14 messages. We're out! And now, 'House Hunters: Broom Closet Edition.' Cozy open concept.
Matchday 10 — vs Denver Horse-Track
103-93 (W)
The game begins and Jayson Tatum is ready! You can see that dawg mentality written all over his face!
Payton Pritchard dishes and converts! An and-one driving to the hoop! Money!
Luguentz Dort draws the offensive foul! Smart play, great positioning!
This next-level player Luguentz Dort with the wraparound pass! How did that get through!
Payton Pritchard penetrates with purpose every possession! This up-and-coming baller chess master!
Break! Dwight Powell takes his jersey off before even reaching the locker room. Locker room intel: Dwight Powell has a tattoo of a basketball hoop on his butt. That's commitment. Back for the second half. The coach slammed his fist on the table.
A buzzer-beater by Jayson Tatum from way beyond the arc! Iron discipline in every fiber!
The arena is electric! This guy with a proven track record Payton Pritchard thriving in a Playoff atmosphere!
This name that's buzzing Derrick White unites the locker room! Scary good handles captain's mentality!
The stadium knows it! Luguentz Dort is special! This established player writing legacy!
Dwight Powell, this tower, celebrates the win! A fist pump toward the bench! What a game!
Payton Pritchard and Derrick White do the conga. Alone. On an empty court. Nobody joins in. Meanwhile, your favorite commentator spilled coffee on the mixing board. Twice. Until next time! Up next: 'Kitchen Nightmares: Corporate Cafeteria.' This is gonna be good.
Matchday 11 — vs New York Over-Timers
92-110 (L)
Derrick White dribbles with energy from the opening whistle! This next-level player locked in!
Derrick White, this walking skyscraper, can't finish from way beyond the arc! That one stings!
Dwight Powell spins the orange right to the defense! Costly mistake by this solid pro!
Payton Pritchard gets burned on the drive! Occasional mental lapses in lateral movement!
Jayson Tatum crosses over and scores! A scoop layup! This beanpole is a problem!
Break time. Dwight Powell bolts to the locker room without looking at anyone. Little scoop: Dwight Powell tried to bribe the DJ to play his song. The DJ agreed. Nobody liked it. Back to hostilities. Faces have changed in the locker room.
Luguentz Dort dunks and kicks the stanchion! This hooper's hooper losing composure!
Payton Pritchard fires a pull-up jumper from downtown but can't connect! Occasional mental lapses showing!
This next-level player Derrick White recognizes the over-help and punishes it!
Jayson Tatum misses from fatigue! This player on the come-up can't get the elevation on the low block!
Dwight Powell goes to work past the media. This hooper's hooper not in the mood to talk.
Jayson Tatum's eyes are glassy. Payton Pritchard mumbles 'we'll get them next time' without believing it. I spent this entire evening standing because my chair has been broken for three games. Nobody fixes it. That's a wrap! Coming up: 'American Idol: Accountant Edition.' Singing, dancing, and spreadsheets.
Matchday 12 — vs Cleveland Twin-Towers
104-105 (L)
Luguentz Dort drives onto the floor! The crowd roars for this hooper's hooper!
Luguentz Dort, this seasoned vet, knifes through for a deep three at the buzzer! Wow!
Luguentz Dort, this swiss-army-knife type, can't keep up with the speed! Sometimes predictable game exposed!
Luguentz Dort dunks but the shot rims out! Lack of consistency rears its ugly head!
Luguentz Dort converts the and-one! A catch-and-shoot triple! This well-respected player won't go quietly!
That's a wrap for now. Derrick White dives into the tunnel. Little secret: Derrick White watches cat videos between quarters. Says it's relaxing. We're off again! The crowd chants the team's name.
Dwight Powell, this absolute unit, chokes on the big stage! Late in the quarter miss!
This established player Derrick White stares at the ref! That look could freeze water!
Dwight Powell has found another gear! This league veteran shifting into overdrive!
This player making noise Luguentz Dort gets the look but can't convert! Ego the size of Texas at the worst time!
This legit talent Derrick White congratulates the opponent. Class in defeat from this legit talent.
Jayson Tatum pulls his cap down over his eyes. Payton Pritchard doesn't have a cap, and it shows. My chair squeaked the entire game. Everyone thinks it was me. It was not me. See you soon. Coming up: 'Extreme Couponing: Family of Eight at Walmart.' Double episode.
Matchday 13 — vs Boston Ring-Chasers
98-111 (L)
Jayson Tatum fires up the crowd to open the game! This solid pro starting strong!
Derrick White with a rough scoop layup at the top of the key! Defense that's basically a suggestion at the worst time!
Dwight Powell penetrates into a dead end at the top of the key! Turnover! Shaky emotions under pressure!
This seasoned vet Jayson Tatum commits the and-one foul! Defense that's basically a suggestion in positioning!
This respected competitor Derrick White capitalizes from the right corner! A buzzer beater with a killer instinct!
The players disappear. Derrick White has a makeshift neck brace out of a towel. I've been told Derrick White once ordered a pizza during a timeout. The coach was not amused. We resume. Eyes locked in, jaws clenched.
Derrick White, this tower, throws the hands up! Exasperated in the paint!
Payton Pritchard, this elusive guard, draws the foul but can't capitalize! Occasional mental lapses!
Jayson Tatum, this titan, uses the jab step to freeze the defender! Crafty!
Luguentz Dort, this versatile guy, with tired legs driving to the hoop! Ego the size of Texas slowing this next-level player down!
This up-and-coming baller Jayson Tatum shakes hands and moves on. In the end, shaky emotions under pressure proved costly.
Derrick White whispers 'this can't be real' under his breath. Dwight Powell nods without conviction. On my end, I discovered the arena's coffee machine was broken. The game nearly went uncommentated. We're out! And now, 'House Hunters: Broom Closet Edition.' Cozy open concept.
Matchday 14 — vs San Antonio Skyscrapers
90-119 (L)
Jayson Tatum, this beanpole, is introduced and the arena explodes! This name that's buzzing is in the building!
Payton Pritchard with a wild attempt! This league veteran not finding the range tonight!
This solid pro Jayson Tatum gets pickpocketed from mid-range! Sloppy handling!
Derrick White turns the head and loses the man! This name that's buzzing napping defensively!
Luguentz Dort with another reverse layup! You can't stop this man!
End of the first half. Luguentz Dort is beet red but still standing. Exclusive info: Luguentz Dort is banned for life from the McDonald's near the arena. The details remain murky. The players jog toward the court. The air is electric.
This solid pro Derrick White shakes the head in disbelief! Nothing going right!
This league veteran Jayson Tatum misses the mark! A pull-up jumper goes begging in the paint!
This player on the come-up Luguentz Dort runs the pick-and-pop to perfection! Tactical mastery!
This legit talent Dwight Powell can barely get up the court! Fatigue setting in!
Derrick White walks off in silence. This league veteran gave it all but it wasn't enough.
Jayson Tatum refuses San Antonio Skyscrapers's handshake. Dwight Powell offers a limp one with just his fingertips. I drank so much coffee tonight I'm going to commentate in my sleep. Good evening! Up next: 'Criminal Minds: Finding the Colleague Who Steals Yogurt from the Fridge.'
Matchday 15 — vs Oklahoma City Treasure-Chest
100-101 (L)
Payton Pritchard, this up-and-coming baller, draws first blood! A buzzer beater to start!
A half-court heave from Dwight Powell! Another dagger! This name that's buzzing closing the door!
This player making noise Derrick White bites on the fake! Beaten at half court!
Luguentz Dort with the off-balance thunderous slam! This next-level player couldn't set the feet!
This name that's buzzing Derrick White rallies the troops! The team feeds off iron discipline!
The players disappear. Dwight Powell has a makeshift neck brace out of a towel. Exclusive: Dwight Powell was caught reading a philosophy book on the bench. It was Nietzsche. Back at it! The coach said two words. Two words that were enough.
Payton Pritchard steps back but can't score in the second quarter! Opportunity lost!
Derrick White can't mask the disappointment! This next-level player wearing it on the sleeve!
Remember this moment! Dwight Powell is making history with a bucket!
Derrick White can't convert in the first quarter! This name that's buzzing shrinks in the moment!
Dwight Powell had the chances but couldn't convert. This seasoned vet left wanting.
Payton Pritchard lets out a nervous laugh that sends chills down your spine. Dwight Powell decides not to comment. During the timeout, I tried to do pull-ups on the edge of the broadcast booth. Zero. That's all for tonight! Coming up: 'CSI: Underground Parking Garage.' Riveting stuff.
Unstoppable vegas ends the season #7 with a 9W-6L record. Season MVP: Jayson Tatum.
Season journal Unstoppable vegas
💬 💬 Comments & Suggestions (0)
💭
No comments yet. Be the first to share your opinion!
